My Alleged Husband

Chapter 618 - 597: Calm_1

Ran Zhihan really didn’t know how to explain this matter to her husband. Although she had made everything clear, why was it that in the end he still refused to believe her? A marriage without trust—could she truly be happy? She was constantly reflecting on herself, but each time, she pressed herself into a corner, forcing herself to make a decision, to spend her whole life with him. Yet the final result was her own deep hurt. How could his heart be at peace? After loving someone so earnestly for many years, the outcome was such treatment.

At this moment, Ran Zhihan wanted to say nothing and just walk away. But when her husband saw his wife turning to leave, he immediately felt unsettled. Did she now not even wish to explain? Why was giving an explanation so difficult? All he wanted was an explanation that could convince him. Did he no longer deserve even that in her heart?

"Where do you think you’re going? You stand right there; don’t move. We haven’t cleared things up, and you want to leave quietly on your own again? Don’t you think that’s immoral? I’ve given you so much, and yet you betray me, do these things—do you really think I don’t care? You think you can just walk away and leave me alone here, not even caring about your own son—do you think that’s what a mother should do?"

No matter what happens, at the very least you ought to give me a reasonable explanation. Otherwise, I’ll only think you’re evading, simply unwilling to tell me the truth. Do you think we can still live happily together like this? I believe you don’t want to live in agony either. Everyone’s pride is strong; you have your pride, your principles, and I have my dignity, especially as a man.

Think about it—if you were a man and knew your wife had been with another man, but you had to pretend you didn’t know, play lovey-dovey with her, wouldn’t you be disgusted?

To be honest, every time I’m intimate with you, as soon as I remember you’ve had such closeness with another man, my heart hurts. You’ve never cared about my feelings. You always think that if I say I don’t mind, it means I really don’t. But I am no saint. All I want is a whole marriage, but you’ve thoroughly disappointed me. I thought if I worked hard enough, if I could provide for you so you wouldn’t need to lift a finger your entire life, that would be enough. But reality slapped me hard. My wife spent a day and a night with another man while I could do nothing but wait at home. And when she returned, she offered not a word of explanation. What would you think?

Zhihan, I’m not made of wood. I can’t be like those ordinary men who, despite knowing their wives cheated, still go on living with them as if nothing happened. They have their reasons, but I’m different. I have everything I want now, and it all came from my efforts. My conscience is clear—I took no shortcuts. I just endured hardships from a young age and worked hard to achieve what I have now.

I believe I deserved everything I’ve worked so hard for. What have you sacrificed? You just lived with me for a few years and got everything, easily conquering the world. I, who conquered the world, was actually conquered by you, but I won’t be foolishly used by you anymore. I’m no longer the same person; I acknowledge every mistake I’ve made, which may seem insignificant to you, but to me, it’s a lifetime of hurt. Perhaps this pain will prevent me from ever holding my head high again. You live your joyful days willingly, while I suffer alone. My heart aches, yet you act unaffected. How can I come to terms with this? How can I just let it go?"

"In fact, I never spoke any other words to you; I don’t want much. You want a stable marriage, and I’ve always desired a peaceful life. Isn’t that the best for both of us? I admit I’ve done you wrong, but was that my intention? I didn’t want this to happen—it was just becoming entangled in others’ plots. Why can’t you be understanding of my feelings?

Do you think after that incident I’ve been living happily every day? You’re wrong. I’m in agony every day and can’t even imagine how I get through each one. I know this mess is my own making, and there’s no use blaming others.

I didn’t want this to happen, but now that it’s in front of me, how can I fix it? I just want your forgiveness, your sincere forgiveness, so I can stay by your side, serve you, and live with you for life. But you dwell on this incident, unable to let go—where do you place me? Don’t you know what I want?"

Zhang Yichen fell silent. How could he not know what his wife wanted? He knew her so well after all these years; it wasn’t that he was unaware, but he was unwilling to admit the truth. He didn’t want to admit he couldn’t let go of this issue, but his heart was truly in pain. Some things just can’t be let go that easily—there’s the matter of his pride, as well as the face of the entire family. All he could do was suppress everything for the sake of the family’s honor, but wouldn’t that just be an invitation for the calculating to uncover something?

In the end, his only choice was to protect his demeanor and let the matter fade without consequence.