The Villain’s Ending

Chapter 10

The First (10)

Several days passed.

Every morning, at almost the same time, the sound of the door opening could be heard.

That sound had now become a familiar part of daily life.

It was Seraphina.

As always, she entered the room and began tidying up the messes I had made overnight.

But now, there was almost nothing left in the room to mess up.

Empty liquor bottles no longer accumulated, and the ashtray was clean.

After all, as a heavy smoker and alcoholic, being broke had forced me into abstinence from both drinking and smoking.

She stood in the room for a moment, like someone who had lost her purpose.Then, with familiar motions, she wiped the dust from the table and smoothed out the wrinkled sheets.

And then, she ground coffee beans – I didn't know where she'd gotten them from – and brewed coffee.

Come to think of it, she used to take me to various cafes, trying to somehow change my mind.

Though I always had a sullen expression and only received nagging.

The aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the room.

It mingled with the faint scent of lilacs, creating a strange and poignant fragrance.

"The weather's nice today."

She placed the coffee cup on the table beside my bed, looked at me for a moment, and spoke.

Outside, the window was hazy and overcast, but I didn't bother to correct her.

"I've mended your uniform. I noticed a torn part yesterday."

I merely nodded.

"Let me know if you want to go to class together."

I didn't answer.

Seraphina continued to make small talk.

About the book she'd read yesterday, or the professor she'd bumped into in the hallway.

Most of her words scattered into the air.

I heard, but I didn't listen.

I merely stared blankly as the scent of lilacs filled the room and then faded away.

She gradually became less talkative, and at some point, she simply tidied the room in silence and left.

Her appearance was exactly like someone cleaning an old gravestone.

What could she have expected from me?

After all, it was she who had called me a worthless human, someone who never changed, always remaining the same.

Only after she left did I rise from my bed.

Outside, the window was always immersed in the dim light of dawn.

The coffee Seraphina brewed for me was always cold.

I thought about death.

More precisely, about suicide.

Perhaps I was living the most absurd life in this world.

To have concluded that there was no longer any meaning or value in living, blown my brains out, and then returned.

If it was truly the end after dying.

If I couldn't return to my original world, and wasn't collecting the ending, and it was literally me dying as 'Lavin', then I suppose that would be a bit troublesome.

Though, no matter how I die, it seems it'll all be a dog's death anyway.

Perhaps I was actually doing alright right now.

If I was capable of having such thoughts.

I spent a day with such meaningless thoughts, and then welcomed another.

All while supposedly diligently living my life.

At least for me, suicide wasn't a reason to abandon daily life.

If it had been 'Lavin', he would have certainly holed himself up, so 'I' had to at least be like this.

Normal, abandoning any scoundrel-like behavior, just ordinary...

It had no meaning. Yet, still.

In any case, classes were boring.

Professors wrote something on the blackboard, and students took notes.

I merely looked out the window. The sky, trapped within the rectangular window frame, always shone blue.

When classes ended, I returned straight to my dorm room.

I disliked encountering anyone, and talking was even worse.

The world continued to spin just fine without me.

It was an afternoon during which such days repeated themselves.

After my last class, upon returning to my room, I found a white envelope tucked into the doorframe.

It was a rather thick envelope, sealed with the Academy's crest.

'Final Decision Notification from the Disciplinary Committee.'

I carried it into the room.

Sitting on the sofa, I started to open the envelope, but then sighed and simply tossed it onto the table.

Then I lay down on the bed.

I closed my eyes.

I tried hard not to think of anything.

But if you tell yourself not to be conscious of blinking, you only become more conscious of it.

Because the mind is weak to negation.

About a week passed like that.

I holed myself up in my room and did nothing.

After all, if I'd been expelled, there would be no reason to attend classes.

No one came to kick me out.

Perhaps I was lucky.

Seraphina still came every morning, but now she neither brewed coffee nor spoke to me.

After all, I had never drunk the coffee she made for me, always leaving it untouched where it was.

From a certain point, she would just stand there blankly, glance around the room I hadn't messed up, and then quietly leave.

As I cowardly kept postponing the days of my death, a system message appeared before my eyes.

[Collect the Ending! 1/?]

[Reward: Return to your original world.]

As if to say, if you're going to live like that, just die quickly.

Indeed, if I'm told to do it, I have to.

Because 'Lavin' and I both used to be like that.

I got engaged because I was told to, loved because I was told to, became trash perhaps because I was called trash every day, and was told that it would be good if someone like me just died every day.

I should die then.

Well, they'll send me back on their own, won't they?

After all, dying like this, without any meaning, must surely be one of the Endings.

Seraphina might pretend to be sad for a very brief moment, but Kyle would somehow...

That's still something I'd rather not have.

Even so, I'm sure I can go back.

Definitely.

Absolutely.

I kicked off the blanket covering me, then stomped on one end to lift it, tore it in half, rolled it up like a rope, and then wove the two blanket pieces together to make a long noose.

Then I firmly tied it to the part where the wooden beam ran across the ceiling, and placed a chair underneath.

I took off my shoes and climbed onto the chair barefoot.

I took one breath in, and then let it out.

I wasn't particularly fond of pain, but surely, just like last time, I'd open my eyes to find myself back, or perhaps returned to where I originally belonged.

I'd go back just like that.

Surely, on the right side of my desk, there would be a half-melted, bland iced coffee that I hadn't even finished, and in front of me, a laptop.

What was the title? I couldn't even remember now.

Anyway, this world would be contained within that small monitor.

I put my head into the noose.

And then, someone—I didn't know who—knocked on the door at an incredibly impeccable time.

So much so that it made me wonder if someone was actually watching my room.

Knock, knock.

I didn't answer.

But the knocking didn't stop.

"Lavin Edelgard? I know you're in there."

It was Estelle's voice.

Her voice was as bright and cheerful as ever.

If I just stayed still like this, that arrogant person would probably break the door down to get in.

She was that kind of person.

A sigh escaped me involuntarily.

That even dying required timing was quite an exhausting matter.

I untied the rope hanging from the ceiling and casually tossed it onto the bed.

The noose unwound weakly, becoming just a dirty piece of blanket.

I kicked the chair back to its original spot.

There's a limit to how draining things can be.

Moving my creaking joints, I walked towards the entrance.

Creak.

As I opened the door, Estelle came into view, leaning against the hallway wall and crunching on an apple.

She was dressed in her white priest's attire, as always.

"Well, you came out quickly. I thought I'd have to knock for another ten minutes."

She spoke in a tone as if chiding a friend who was late for an appointment.

In one hand, she held a half-eaten apple.

"I was wondering why you weren't coming to church."

It was a tone as if chiding a friend who was late for an appointment.

Though I wasn't sure when we'd become this chummy.

"Why should I go?"

My voice didn't come out properly.

Perhaps because it was the first time I'd spoken in days, it was rough, as if mixed with sand.

"Didn't you get the notification?"

I did get it.

If the person who came to tell me to clear out was a saint, I wondered if I should be happy; it seemed like something to ponder.

"I've been put in charge of supervising your community service. I've already spoken to Levina about it."

"Community service?"

"...You didn't even read it, did you? Well, I thought as much."

Estelle chuckled.

She glanced into my room but didn't bother to step inside.

"Your eyes are full of listlessness. Is life that boring to you?"

Her fingers brushed my cheek.

"Well, if you're holed up in your room staring at the ceiling every day, I suppose that makes sense."

I didn't bother to avoid her hand.

"It's a one-month suspension and 200 hours of community service.

Quite lenient, wasn't it? Aren't you surprised?"

Her tone was full of playfulness, but her eyes weren't smiling.

"I pulled some strings, you see.

Spouting some idiotic Bible verses about how every sinner deserves a chance or whatever. Heh.

You're pitiful, aren't you? I heard you were disowned from the family.

As for the broken engagement story, well, that's a famous one."

Estelle took another bite of her apple, then grabbed my wrist, forcibly pressed the apple she was eating into my hand, and spoke.

"So, this Saint will bestow mercy upon you.

What you have to do... well, you just have to be my talking companion.

Or take walks with me. How about it, easy, right?

Don't worry, I've already marked your attendance for the past week."

Estelle winked as she spoke.

Her red eyes sparkled mischievously.

I didn't utter a single reply.

Perhaps because my head was completely filled with thoughts of dying, it felt as though my mind wasn't functioning properly.

Perhaps taking my silence as approval, Estelle wore a satisfied expression.

"Follow me."

She snatched my wrist.

Her hand was slender and white, yet surprisingly strong.

I didn't resist, and was helplessly dragged along by her.