Northeast: My Absurd Woman

Chapter 245 Auspicious Smoke Emerging from the Ancestral Grave

Du Qiu sat up, looking bewildered, and touched his legs as he looked at Yang Wu Ni.

"What are you looking at? You're not really paralyzed, you're just pretending for a few days."

As long as your mother doesn't want to take care of you, this fake paralyzed person, she'll definitely agree to your relationship with Sister Liping.

Once your mother pulls you back, your relationship will be officially recognized.

After you turn one hundred, when you die, you can be buried in your family's ancestral grave.

I thought of this trick all night; it's even more effective than having Wang Fengxian scare her.

Yang Wuni sat smugly on the edge of the kang (a heated brick bed), crossing her legs and shaking them incessantly.

"Sister-in-law Wu Ni, that's a really cunning trick of yours. Du Qiu's mother would never have imagined it."

Hou Jiu poked his head out from under the covers and gave Yang Wuni a thumbs-up.

"Haha! What's that? I'm just playing a trick on kids."

Zhang Changyao and Liao Zhi are really something else, they'll be here in a minute.

"You and Sister Liping are coming to my house too. Liao Zhi and Zhang Changyao have something good for you to handle."

Yang Wuni watched as the group got dressed and went home to wait for Zhang Changyao to come back so they could have dinner together.

"Wu Ni, nobody wanted the popcorn, so I brought it all back."

As soon as Zhang Changyao entered the room, he plopped down on the kang (a heated brick bed) and slammed his fist on it, making it slam shut.

"Zhang Changyao, why is nobody wanting the popcorn? The old lady who delivered it a couple of days ago said they didn't have enough to sell!"

Yang Wuni went outside to look at the donkey cart, patted Zhang Changyao's leg, and asked in confusion.

"I asked around, and everyone said no, saying that other people were selling the same thing as us, but for a cheaper price."

Zhang Changyao suddenly turned around and sat up, his eyes bloodshot.

"There's someone else who can make popcorn? Does that mean Wang Ga betrayed us?"

Yang Wuni's first reaction was to confront Wang Ga, so she picked up a shovel from the outer room and left.

"Wu Ni, Wu Ni, let's not rush to settle accounts with him. It's not too late to come back later."

Let me think about what to do about this; we're not in a hurry to fight.

Zhang Changyao pulled Yang Wuni, who was fiery and energetic, and unloaded the popcorn, carrying it inside for everyone to eat.

Zhang Changyao told Hou Jiu and Hou Liping what Guo Erluzi had said.

Then he told Hou Liping how to talk to Hou Da Yanjing's parents about this matter.

Let them know that without the child to keep them in check, Zheng Meizhi wouldn't stay at his house for even a day, and Hou Liping nodded repeatedly in agreement.

"Hou Jiu, the reason I sent you to find Miao Yu is not simply to help Zheng Meizhi."

Liao Zhi and I want to help you, but we don't know what your thoughts are.

You've met Miao Yu before; she's the young and beautiful director of the family planning office in the township.

Liao Zhi and I want to set you up with her. Do you agree?

Zhang Changyao drank a bowl of porridge, wiped his mouth clean with his hand, and then asked Hou Jiu.

"what?"

Hou Jiu, who was drinking porridge with his head down, had two big eyes that looked like they were about to pop out.

He kept his mouth open for a long time, probably because he didn't understand what Zhang Changyao said.

"What? You don't agree to marry Miao Yu or go to Miao Yu's house?" Yang Wuni added.

"Brother Changyao, you and Liao Zhijing are teasing me. Who is Miao Yu? How could she possibly be dating me?"

Even if my ancestral graves were emitting auspicious smoke, I still wouldn't be worthy of being a big shot like Miao Yu.

Hou Jiu shook his head vigorously and continued to drink the porridge in his bowl.

"Hou Jiu, all you know is eating. With your character, you'll never be able to hook up with Miao Yu."

Only if you listen to me and Zhang Changyao, and we help you, will you be able to win Miao Yu's heart.

"As long as you hook up with Miao Yu, you'll never have to worry about food or drink for the rest of your life."

Liao Zhi patted Hou Jiu on the back, startling Hou Jiu, who turned around sharply to look at Liao Zhi.

"What are you looking at? Haven't you ever seen a living person lying down before?" Liao Zhi raised his hand, showing it off to Hou Jiu.

"My God! You were actually pretending you couldn't move, you're really something."

Hou Jiu was too clever for his own good; he actually thought Liao Zhi had been faking illness and lying to people.

"Hou Jiu, what are you saying? It was my superior medical skills that cured Liao Zhi."

Yang Deshan quickly explained, fearing that his achievements would be ruined by Hou Jiu's words.

"Oh my! Fatty Uncle, aren't you a miracle doctor? Since you have this skill, please help me with the acupuncture too."

"Get rid of all the poverty in me, and preferably, get rid of it in a way that makes me rich."

Hou Jiu put down his rice bowl, sidled up to Yang Deshan, grabbed his hand, and begged him.

"Hou Jiu, what are you thinking? Your uncle is a doctor, not God."

If he could make people rich, would you be the first one to get it?

"I told my uncle to prick me first. As long as it makes me rich, I'll accept being pricked with holes like a sieve." Zhang Changyao teased Hou Jiu with a smile.

"Alright! I'll listen to you and Liao Zhi. If I can get my hands on Miao Yu, it'll be a stroke of good luck."

"You two tell me what to do, and I'll do it, just don't let me steal it by force."

Hou Jiu straightened his back and spread his five fingers like a comb.

I poked my hair, which I hadn't washed in ages, until it was all wrinkled.

"Hou Jiu, I'll have your sister-in-law Wu Ni find the new clothes I'm not wearing in a bit."

When you get home, wash everything inside and out, and put my clothes on the outside.

Here's a book for you to take. When you're looking for Miao Yu, read it as you walk.

When you see her, stammer and speak haltingly. If she asks you a question, just say you're nervous when you see her.

Miao Yu has always been assertive since childhood, and he likes educated, timid, and submissive pretty boys.

First, transform yourself into this kind of person, then let Liao Zhi handle the rest.

"Hou Jiu, don't rush this matter; we need to take it slowly."

Zhang Changyao glanced at the popcorn bucket on the ground and had an idea.

"Brother Changyao, Sister-in-law Wuni, my...my mother sent me to invite you over for dinner."

Ma Pengsheng entered the room and saw the empty bowls and chopsticks on the dining table. He blinked his cross-eyed eyes and scratched his head to ease the awkwardness.

"Pengsheng, we're leaving right away. You hurry home and get your things."

Zhang Changyao fed the donkey some corn feed and gave it half a basin of warm water.

Driving four people to Ganggang Village was no easy task, and he felt a little sorry for his donkey.

"Wu Ni, why aren't you changing your clothes?"

Zhang Changyao spread the mattress on the donkey cart and carried it by one side.

Waiting for Yang Wuni to get on the bus, so I could fold the blanket back and cover her legs.

"Zhang Changyao, I won't go. It's too tiring to pull these people with donkeys."

Take Du Qiu Ge home, carry him to the kang (heated brick bed), and before leaving, tell Du Qiu Ge's mother that Sister Li Ping wants to take care of Du Qiu Ge, and then you leave.

"You don't need to worry about the rest, and don't let my dad worry about it either. We'll just wait for Du Qiu's parents to come begging to us."

Du Qiu and Ma Pengsheng got into the cart, while Zhang Changyao and the other two drove the donkey cart southwards.

After entering Ganggang Village and taking Du Qiu home, Zhang Changyao finished saying what Yang Wuni had taught her, then turned and left with a cold face.

"Brother Changyao, Brother Changyao, come quick! My mom rubbed my watch off."