My Alleged Husband

Chapter 665 - 638 Admission of Wrongdoing_3

The me that once harbored a 10 out of 10 level of extravagant hope, wished for my mom and dad to return to my side, but now I no longer hold such extravagant hopes, because I know, whether my mom and dad will be by my side or not, there’s nothing I can do to live a happy life throughout my life. Only with my parents continuing at my side could I live a happy life, but I later found that this isn’t the case. Whether my mom and dad are with me or not, I can still live a happy life, because I have my grandfather. With my grandfather, it’s like having the whole world.

I used to think that losing my mom and dad was the same as losing the whole world, but now I no longer think that way.

I’ve come to understand that as long as Grandpa is with me, even if I lose the whole world, what does it matter? At least my grandpa truly loves me, at least he holds me deep in his heart, at least he can give up the whole world for me, even his own life. That’s enough for me alone, I’m not the greedy type, just a tiny bit of kindness from others is enough for me. But you couldn’t give me even that in your whole life. In your eyes, maybe I am nothing, but I really, really wanted the love of my own parents. Yet time and again, you chose to hurt me. Where do you place me, what do you think I am? How could my heart not ache?"

"Child, we’ve said before..."

"Please don’t come to me with these things again, because every promise you utter, I take seriously, and then I bury it in my heart time and again, only for you not to fulfill your promises, leaving me in agony. I don’t want to accept this anymore, do you understand?

Time is a cheat; it has turned promises into lies. The longer time goes by, the less you will remember what you promised, you only know how much pain those repeated decisions caused you, how unbearable. Do you know how distressed I am, how much pain I’m in? As a descendant, how could my heart not care about these matters, these pains? You never cared about what I felt in my heart. I have considered so much for you time and again, but what about you? I thought that as long as you could come back, I could forgive you without any hesitation. But now I really can’t do it anymore. I am no longer the foolish person I was before. I can’t forgive you just because of a few pleasant words, only to wait foolishly for you alone, and in the end, not even see a shadow of you. Do you know how disappointing that is? Disappointment time and again creates ultimate despair, and once a person despairs, can he still have hope for another? It’s absolutely impossible. You’ve turned my hope for you into despair time and again, how am I supposed to trust you again? How am I to believe that my mom and dad genuinely have a biological son like me? You have no right to ask for my forgiveness over and over when you’re not genuine. I am a living person too; I need my inner spirit, my ultimate solace. I can’t just watch my parents deceive me over and over again like I’m a fool..."

Old Master Zhang stood to the side, silent. He understood that his child and grandchild were discussing these issues, and knew if they weren’t properly addressed now, it would only become harder to clarify in the future. He couldn’t let those misunderstandings develop time and again; it would be too tiresome for him.

Hmm, he didn’t want his grandchild to live such a weary life. If this weariness continued, he would rather his grandchild spend his life blinded by hatred. He knew that his grandchild was the one he cherished most in his life, and what had transpired was beyond his wildest imaginings. He no longer had any way to stop whatever outcome the future might hold.

"Child, is there really no way for you to forgive us as your parents? The decisions we made were agonizing. How could we willingly abandon our child and not return home? We had our difficult reasons, unspeakable sufferings. Couldn’t you try to consider things from our perspective? Being parents is very hard, don’t you understand? You’re a parent now; you know what should be done for your child. You know that for your child, you can disregard everything. So why can’t you understand our feelings?"

Zhang Yichen found his father’s words to be quite ludicrous.

"Do you think you’ve been qualified parents? I could stop working for the sake of my child, give up my career to be by my child’s side. Could you do that? You didn’t work to earn money for your child’s milk powder. Instead, you abandoned your child for your own freedom. This is a completely different nature of things. Why do you mix them up? Do you think that by saying this we will forgive you? I am no saint; I can’t forgive, as before, naively, whatever you say, masking me over and over. I can be indifferent and not hold grudges, but I really cannot watch you hurt me time and again while offering me sweets. Do you really treat me like a three-year-old child? Do you truly think I’m unaware of everything you do, that I’d be indifferent to your actions? But that’s not the case. Many things I simply choose not to speak of, and not speaking doesn’t mean I don’t know. I keep silent to avoid embarrassing us both. You are my parents, after all, and I still consider sparing your dignity, but what about you? Have you ever considered my feelings? Not once, right?"

Since you’ve never cared about my feelings, why should I keep you deep in my heart, idolizing you like gods? Time and again, I’ve had to consider your outcomes, what awkward situations you might face. But have you ever considered for me? In making your decisions, you’ve never thought about the embarrassment and discomfort I, your son, would feel. You only thought about the freedom and joy you desired, the life you wanted to lead, where you wanted to wander. But you never considered whether you should honor the sage advice of returning to your roots, returning to your family, to be by your child’s side to make sure they could live the happy life they deserved, did you?"