My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1256 - 1085: I Told You Long Ago

I remember telling you long ago that the most important thing between a husband and wife is loyalty. If the basic loyalty and honesty between two people cannot be maintained, then don’t expect others to genuinely treat you. When you exploit someone’s sincerity over and over again, what right do you have to demand that others endure being hurt by you time and time again?

"Child, do you know? The most important thing in a marriage is loyalty. If loyalty is gone, then the breakdown of marriage is not far off. I once forgot what loyalty meant; I didn’t know what loyalty truly was and hurt the one who loved me most. This is the greatest regret of my life. Why did I keep making decisions that hurt those who loved me the most? Why couldn’t I keep the people who loved me by my side, yet continually hurt and drive them away? My heart really hurts—so much that sometimes I’ve become numb. I don’t know what kind of life I truly want, or who I really want to love. I just know that I miss him terribly, and even after all these years with your father, I still long for him."

Perhaps you think I, as a mother, am a bit fickle and unfaithful to my husband. But do you know? He loved me so much; he gave up his whole world for me. I’m not heartless, nor am I unaware. Why would I want things to turn out this way?

Everything in this world is fair. Whatever you’ve done will return to you as karma; it’s inevitable. Mistakes I’ve made will come back to haunt me, no matter how big or small, as retributions spinning above my head, ensuring I’ll never be able to recover in this lifetime. My only regret is why I did those things that hurt the one who loved me so much. I lost everything, my world collapsed. Although there might have been some love with your father, it ultimately was not with the person I loved the most.

Child, remember, no matter what difficulties or temptations you encounter, do not betray the one who loves you the most.

Neither love nor marriage can withstand any betrayal. If betrayal occurs, marriage will face extinction!

During that time, I was waiting day and night for his message. I marked all his messages as most important, waiting day by day, night by night, watching my phone. I hoped he’d send me something, even if it was to scold me. But in the end, I got nothing. That’s when I knew I had truly lost him, lost the entire world!

I pleaded time and time again for him not to delete me, just to leave me with one last connection. But he heartlessly abandoned everything about me. I was truly in despair. Facing this world, I could see nothing. I only knew my mind was utterly devoid of drive, and my heart completely hollow. I only saw the darkest place; that was the territory of death!"

Zhang Yichen was utterly taken aback when his mother poured out her heart to him. He had always believed his parents had a loving relationship, never realizing it was merely an illusion. His mother had an early love, who had supposedly given her everything. He couldn’t believe his mother’s life was so blissful, or that her life had been so spent.

Perhaps, as everyone says, only you can comprehend what each phase of life brings in terms of different consequences. I don’t know what kind of ending I’ll face, just that perhaps living such a life leaves you with no way to change it. Everyone lives so hard, so weary.

"Mom, did you once feel his pace was too fast, with no way to follow him? Were you constantly stepping to his rhythm, thinking that as long as you followed in someone’s footsteps, you could be with him forever? But you didn’t expect that by giving up all your principles, and all you cared about, you repeatedly lied to your family just to be with him. In the end, you still lost him. Only after losing him did you understand he was the most important person to you. You longed for a lifetime with him, but ultimately, fate didn’t care about human plans. No one had anticipated what pain heaven would bring. You only wanted steady companionship, but God still took those chances away, leaving you with no way!"

"Deep down, you know, even if you had kept up with his pace, he might not have been yours. It’s all unknown unless you truly got engaged and walked down the aisle. No matter how good your relationship was, you might still part ways. Yet you couldn’t help but get deeper, until now your all is entwined with his. You just wish for one more glance at him, his smile brings you joy, his sorrow causes you more pain than anyone."

"But ultimately, you still lost him. Losing him was destiny, but you can never forget him, he’s indelibly imprinted in your mind. The joy he brought, the love he gave, all he did for you is deeply etched in your heart, unless you can replace your heart, or on the day you enter the coffin, then you might forget all of this. But I guess you wouldn’t want to forget, right?"

"You’re right. I’ll never forget in this lifetime. I’ll always engrave all the love he gave me in my heart. I’m not going to change my heart. Even when I’m laid to rest, I’ll carry it with me, because he’s the only person I’ve loved in this life. Maybe my love was too abundant, causing everything to turn into disaster. But who knows, every road I’ve walked will always be embedded in my mind, never able to forget.

I walked every path alone with him, every place filled with his silhouette, with no way to erase it, even with every movement coming from the heart. Who can understand this enduring pain? A lifetime without relief, and I’d rather live in pain than ever forget him!"

"No matter how paths you’ve once traveled turned out, never try to escape what you knew before. Perhaps in your worldview, you think it’s not what you want. But at the moment others repeatedly get hurt and grieved, what do you want really? In the deep recesses of your heart, you should understand that all you’re yearning for is the most genuine affection..."