Chased By My Billionaire Ex-husband

Chapter 201: If He Wanted to Live?

Author’s POV

Evander had heard enough.

He didn’t want to stand there anymore or hear another word. He couldn’t digest what he had just heard. It was too much for him, and he was having a hard time breathing.

All this time, he thought Elijah died trying to protect him and had always felt guilty that he died instead of him. But now... He couldn’t tell if he had stolen Elijah’s life!

If not for him... Elijah would still be alive and well. He would have been the one taking care of his kids and...

It felt like someone had dug their hands inside his chest and twisted his heart to the point that he was bleeding. He wanted to scream, break something or just kill everyone who had harmed his brother to the point that he was no longer in this world.

The people he cherished the most were gone... just to keep him safe!

But was he wanted to be saved? After everything, wasn’t it better that he had died instead?

"Evan..." Caspian called, his voice low as he wasn’t sure how to comfort him and take all his pain away.

He stood there, frozen as his eyes were locked on his friend’s back.

He knew what he’d done. He had hidden the truth from his best friends, the only family he had in this world. Evander and Damian lived their lives not knowing anything about the person who had been with them from the start.

But he couldn’t say it.

How could he possibly tell them when he wasn’t even sure if he could bare the pain of losing them?

Caspian had already been treated like shit for who he was. He was ridiculed and laughed at for his sexual preferences. He had spent years pretending and hiding everything so that Evander and Damian wouldn’t notice it.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to tell them... It’s just... they were all he had left. If they turned away from him too... he didn’t think he’d survive in this world.

"I... I want to be alone," Evander muttered in a hoarse voice, as he took a shaky step forward.

But Caspian couldn’t let him leave before telling everything he had to tell.

"I... I still have a lot of things that I want to tell you," he said quickly, trying to stop him.

Evander didn’t even look back. He just raised his hand, stopping him.

"You can say whatever you want to... later," he whispered. "But if I listen to anything more right now... I might lose my mind and couldn’t go on normally."

Caspian froze. His fingers kept rubbing against each other, trying to find the right words that could comfort his friend, but he couldn’t say anything even if he wanted to say more.

But when his eyes drifted toward Claire, who stood beside Evander, holding onto him, keeping him steady when he looked like he could fall apart any second, it made something in Caspian’s worry settle a little.

"Let me take you to your room," Claire said gently, her hand slipping into Evander’s, trying to steady him from his staggering steps.

He didn’t say a word as Claire was there for him.

Caspian just let her guide him forward away from himself.

And Caspian just stood there, watching his friend disappear down the hallway, wondering if he had already lost him or if there was some hope left for him.

"Are you alright?" Damian’s voice came from behind. It was low and uncertain. "I’m really sorry... I didn’t know anything and just blurted things out."

Caspian didn’t move.

He stood there, still as stone and frozen. Caspian was ready for being judged, being punched, cursed at, hated for the lies he’d buried and the truth he had never had the guts to reveal.

"I..." Damian tried again when Caspian didn’t reply. He still wanted to say something but...

Caspian still didn’t turn around.

Damian’s shoulders sank as he looked down. He didn’t know how to express what he was feeling.

He should’ve noticed things that were right in front of him.

But all he’d ever been was a nuisance in their lives. And when they needed someone who could actually help, he only disappointed them.

He was still caught in his thoughts when a body slammed into him from nowhere, knocking the air out of his chest and forcing him a few steps back.

Damian stumbled a few steps back and steadied himself, and caught Caspain firmly in his arms.

"You... don’t have to say sorry!" Caspian muttered as tears started streaming out of his eyes. "But... But I loved him! I loved him so much!"

"Yes, Yes, I know..." Damian slowly patted Caspian’s back while Sissy looked at them in shock.

Sissy had still not recovered from the shock after what she had heard.

First of all, she shouldn’t be there listening to all these things, but now that she had... She didn’t know who had suffered more in this relationship.

They all had suffered badly, not telling each other about their pain.

Caspain slowly pulled back from Damian’s arms and glanced at him with glistening eyes and a tear-stained face.

"Are you not disgusted by the fact that I don’t like women? Instead, men?" Caspian asked as he composed himself, feeling embarrassed for acting this way.

"You are our friend, and we didn’t befriend you because we were interested in your preferences!" Damian pronounced. "We have been through so much in this life together that no matter what... We are part of each other’s lives, and other than that, nothing matters!"

Caspian was relieved. He was so happy to hear that, but he still wanted to hear such words from Evander’s mouth. He glanced toward the place where Evander had left.

"Give him some time," Damian said, patting his back.

"I understand, but I hope he would have heard everything that I have to say," Caspian said in a low voice, thinking he still had a lot to reveal.