Yellow Skinned Taoist Master

Chapter 76: My Surname Is Chen Too!

A dream is still a dream. No matter how beautiful — eventually you wake from it.

Chen Huangpi opened his eyes. He saw the brass oil lamp and the Life-reaping Ghost, Golden-Horn and the Fox Mountain God — all of them looking at him with concern and relief.

He also saw — standing inside the main hall, on the verge of growing a third head — his master.

"Master..."

Chen Huangpi murmured quietly, his expression complicated.

The Fox Mountain God hurried to say: "When I woke up, Guanzhu had already become like this. Don't blame me."

"I'm not blaming you."

Chen Huangpi shook his head: "I just had a dream — a dream about my master. I was momentarily moved, that's all."

"What dream?" The brass oil lamp asked curiously.

"My master and I share the same surname.""Obviously!"

Golden-Horn said with contempt: "You're Guanzhu's disciple — of course you take your master's surname. What, would you take Huang Er's surname instead?"

"Wouldn't that make it a lowly surname!"

"Lowly? You're calling me lowly?"

The brass oil lamp's eyes went ablaze, its desire to destroy Golden-Horn barely contained.

Golden-Horn declared with complete entitlement: "You're wrong — not only is your surname lowly, so is that skull's, and so is that fox's. All lowly. Whereas I, Elder, am different. I am a Son of Diting. My surname is naturally a noble one."

What an indiscriminate sweep of insults.

With the exception of Chen Huangpi, both the Life-reaping Ghost and the Fox Mountain God darkened significantly in expression.

"Golden-Horn — you can't be so unreasonable."

Chen Huangpi's brow creased.

Earlier in the Old Temple, this Golden-Horn had looked perfectly loyal. The moment it was out — its true character came barreling out immediately. The time to use it wasn't yet here, but if it kept up like this when that time came, the disadvantages would outweigh the benefits.

With that thought, Chen Huangpi's mind moved. The Soul-Hooking Register slipped out from inside his clothes on its own.

The Soul-Hooking Register contained the Yellow Spring Domain inside it — it could hold many things.

Golden-Horn felt Chen Huangpi's displeasure, hadn't even had time to argue in its defense, and was instantly collected inside the Soul-Hooking Register.

"A'Gui!"

Chen Huangpi turned to the Life-reaping Ghost and said seriously: "You know what to do?"

"One day. All I need is one day, and I'll cure that mouth of its."

Saying that, the Life-reaping Ghost gave a vicious smile and disappeared back into the Soul-Hooking Register.

"Hit hard!"

The brass oil lamp said in fury: "Should have just brought Silver-Horn out instead."

"Silver-Horn..."

Chen Huangpi hesitated, then shook his head: "Silver-Horn's head is empty — easy to manipulate. But Golden-Horn has stronger follow-through. Let A'Gui fix its mouth and it'll be fine."

Done with that.

Chen Huangpi paused, then asked: "Fox Mountain God, Huang Er — there's something I want to ask you both."

"What is it?"

"Ask away."

Both the brass oil lamp and the Fox Mountain God were willing.

Chen Huangpi said: "Can things from dreams be taken seriously?"

The brass oil lamp said: "Dreams are absurd and unrestrained. They can't be taken seriously."

The Fox Mountain God said: "But no matter how absurd a dream is — it can't fabricate things out of nothing. It won't go beyond reality."

"Understood."

Chen Huangpi asked again: "Then — if in my dream there was a person who called me worthless, but that person was also my master's brother — should I be angry?"

"Of course you should be angry!"

"I don't think so."

The brass oil lamp looked at the Fox Mountain God with displeasure: "Guanzhu is Guanzhu — his brother is not Guanzhu. What gives him the right to call Chen Huangpi worthless?"

But the Fox Mountain God didn't answer that. Instead, it asked Chen Huangpi: "Was the relationship between Guanzhu and his brother a good one?"

Chen Huangpi said: "It must have been very good."

If it hadn't been, the Emperor of the Great Qian Immortal Dynasty wouldn't have been so reluctant to let his master come to the Hundred Thousand Mountains.

The Fox Mountain God nodded and said: "If the relationship was very good — then all the more reason not to be angry."

"When someone insults you and you insult them back — that's just trading blows. It doesn't feel satisfying."

"Then what does feel satisfying?"

"Simple. Wait until he's dead. Take his entire estate and inheritance. Wipe out his line completely."

"That's good — that's very good!"

Chen Huangpi's face lit up immediately. He clapped his hands in delight, as if hearing the most brilliant advice imaginable.

The brass oil lamp, however, was unimpressed.

This silly fox only knew how to tell Chen Huangpi what he wanted to hear. It could even spin something out of a dream that didn't exist into some absurd logic. It never stopped to think — what was Guanzhu's cultivation level? What brother could he possibly have? Even if he did — they were likely long dead by now.

The Fox Mountain God, however, felt quietly pleased with itself. It found itself thinking: "This Huang Er, though it has a relationship with Chen Huangpi as close as brothers — it doesn't know how to read the room. What matters isn't what you say, but what Chen Huangpi wants to hear. It won't be long before I work my way into Chen Huangpi's inner circle."

And just at this moment — Chen Huangpi suddenly said offhandedly: "I wonder where My Great Qian Immortal Dynasty has ended up, and what that seal is like. When I've saved Master later, I'll ask him how to break the seal..."

At those words, both the brass oil lamp and the Fox Mountain God went silent.

What did he mean — "My Great Qian Immortal Dynasty?" — did that mean Guanzhu's brother was the Emperor of the Great Qian Immortal Dynasty?

"That's not..."

The Fox Mountain God began: "Chen Huangpi — I don't know where the Great Qian Immortal Dynasty is, but I do know that to the east of the Hundred Thousand Mountains there's a Da Kang kingdom. Succession only passes in one of two ways: father to son, or elder brother to younger brother. Someone like you wouldn't be able to inherit the Great Qian Immortal Dynasty."

"Is that so..."

Chen Huangpi looked toward his master with a thoughtful expression.

The brass oil lamp, seeing that look, immediately understood what Chen Huangpi was thinking.

It was entirely the Fox Mountain God's fault for explaining things so precisely. Father to son, elder brother to younger brother — didn't it know that Guanzhu had raised Chen Huangpi as his own son? A son-in-blood is a son — and isn't a disciple-as-son also a son?

The brass oil lamp quickly said: "Chen Huangpi — you're still young. There's all the time in the world. This can't be rushed. Really, it can't."

The Great Qian Immortal Dynasty had only been sealed by Emperor Chen Huang — it hadn't been destroyed. If Chen Huangpi were to walk up there and start using the imperial "I" for himself — who knew whether the Great Qian Immortal Dynasty would treat him as a rebel and have him executed? The Great Qian Immortal Dynasty was not the Da Kang kingdom. An Immortal Dynasty — the name didn't lie. There were genuine immortals in it.

……

Early the next morning, the base of Mount Yuqiong was in cheerful chaos.

Granny Tang and the community of remnant survivors had made their home at the mountain's foot, building a new village. It was called Huanghu Village now, not Hugou Village as before. The Huang in the name came from Chen Huangpi's Huangpi.

The reason for this name was simple. The remnant survivors felt gratitude for Chen Huangpi saving their lives. Unable to repay him in any substantial way for the time being, this was how they chose to show it.

"Granny Tang! Granny Tang!"

Chen Huangpi called out as soon as he entered the village.

"Coming, coming."

Granny Tang came out of the village shrine, leaning on her walking staff, coughing a few times as she did.

"Granny Tang, you're coughing very badly — are you ill?"

"Yes..."

Granny Tang smiled warmly: "At my age — sickness comes easily. Look — so much of my hair has gone white."

Chen Huangpi noticed it for the first time — Granny Tang's previously lead-grey hair had turned mostly white. She looked as if she had aged a decade or more in a short span of time.

"Granny Tang."

Chen Huangpi thought a moment and said: "When you're sick you need medicine. When I've dealt with what I need to deal with — I'll brew you some herbs. Take them and you'll get better."

"..."

Granny Tang smiled bitterly: "No, little sir — my stomach can't handle your medicines. I'll be better on my own in a few days."

She was a Golden Core cultivator. She didn't get sick in the ordinary sense. The truth was simply that her time was nearly up.

But for Granny Tang, this wasn't particularly terrible. Her only granddaughter had been devoured by the Yellow Peril. The only things she still felt attached to were these remnant villagers. Now that Huanghu Village had been rebuilt once more — when she died, she would die in peace.

Chen Huangpi knew all living things aged and died. He knew even his master would eventually pass on. But he had never witnessed it himself. So when Granny Tang spoke this way, he simply believed her.

In his mind though, he was actually thinking: "Granny Tang doesn't know medicine. When you're sick you need medicine. Without medicine you can't get better. She must not want to owe me any more money and thinks I'm obsessed with profit. She really underestimates me."

"When I come back from the Yellow Springs and the Yin Lands — I'll bring the medicine to her myself. That'll make her see me differently!"

Chen Huangpi had two hearts. One that was kind, one that was crafty. Good people could see his kind heart. Cunning people could see his other side.

At this point, Granny Tang asked: "So, little sir — you called for me so early in the morning. What is it you need?"

Chen Huangpi said: "I came to borrow something. I need nails and a hammer."

"Those I do have."

Granny Tang led Chen Huangpi into the shrine.

"Wait here a moment — I'll go get them for you."

"Thank you, Granny Tang."

Chen Huangpi stood in the shrine and looked around. The shrine was quite simple. The offering table held nothing at all — not even a deity statue. Only two plates of offerings had been placed there instead.

Before long, Granny Tang came back out with the items in hand: nails, a hammer — and a set of Daoist robes.

Chen Huangpi looked at the robes and was immediately taken aback: "Granny Tang — what is this?"

Granny Tang smiled and said: "The Daoist robes you've been wearing are torn and ragged and no longer fitting. And since Guanzhu has gone mad — I took the liberty of making you a new set. I meant to make them a bit large so you could wear them for more years, but you're growing so fast it'll probably be ill-fitting again soon enough."

"My sewing isn't very good either — please don't find fault with them."

"I won't find fault at all."

Chen Huangpi received the robe with delight. It was rough to the touch, not fine fabric — nothing like the one he wore now. But the fit was right.

And most importantly — the color and cut were exactly the same as his current robe. Dark blue-black, with red plum blossoms embroidered on it, and black edging.

He put on the new robe, tied back his hair, and threaded a Demon Tree branch through it. Immediately, it was as if he had become a different person. Before: a young Daoist acolyte. Now: a young man carrying himself with real bearing and grace.

The only slight issue — he was holding a hammer.

Granny Tang asked: "By the way, little sir — what do you need the nails and hammer for?"

Chen Huangpi said: "The Fox Mountain God told me Master keeps moving around at night and it gets very scared. So I'm going to nail Master to the wall — that way he can't move. Tomorrow I'm going to the God-Burying Mound, so if I don't handle this today I won't have time."

Done speaking, Chen Huangpi was off in a flash.

He left Granny Tang standing in the shrine with a thoroughly bewildered look on her face. Every word he had said — she had understood individually. Put together, they had somehow taken on a very different meaning.

Nail Guanzhu to the wall?

"Mountain God!"

Granny Tang called out in her mind to the Fox Mountain God.

The next second, the Fox Mountain God's quiet voice rose: "I only mentioned it in passing. He's the one who decided to go through with it."

Granny Tang said: "But that is Guanzhu himself — how could he be nailed to a wall?"

"Nailing to the wall is the gentle version..."

The Fox Mountain God said miserably: "If Huang Er and I hadn't stopped him — he was already planning to sharpen a peach-wood stake and give Guanzhu a good through-and-through, saying 'it's fine, we'll revive him with the Soul-Returning Jade anyway, Master won't be upset.'"

"Yes, Guanzhu wouldn't be upset with him."

"But Guanzhu is his master — not mine."