The System is Abstract, Luckily, So Am I

Chapter 166 : Compensate Me with Your Youth

"You're right, they really are all little black stick figures. So the Boss has been using this method to silently protect us all along? Is there a safety sign warning us to watch out for helicopters?"

Lin Li looked at the black stick figures on the signs and spoke with deep emotion.

A dusty Bai Bufan stared at Lin Li with wide eyes. How did this animal in front of him manage to seamlessly transition back to the topic from a few minutes ago right after ruthlessly ravaging him?

Was the fact that he just got beaten up going to be glossed over just like that?

It seemed it really was.

Endure. The day I successfully abstain from lust will be the day Lin Li dies.

Will I win? I will win.

Transferring his hatred from the person to the topic, Bai Bufan dusted himself off and sneered, "You fake fans who only know Kobe memes the moment you see a black guy are so annoying. The Boss has 5 championships, 2 FMVPs, 1 MVP, and 30,000 career points. What do you have? Heh."

"A pulse," Lin Li answered calmly.

"..."

Such an abrupt yet serious answer made Bai Bufan himself burst out laughing first.

"Hehe, what a coincidence, me too." Sweeping his gaze around, Bai Bufan pointed not far away and said, "But there really is a number 24 over there."

There was an illuminated basketball court near South Lake Park. The sound of basketball shoes squeaking against the ground, the thud of the ball, and the shouts of the boys drifted over faintly.

And the person Bai Bufan was pointing at was someone playing on the court wearing an Iced Tea jersey.

"Damn, guys who dare to play basketball on an open public court are always so skilled. Someone like me really wouldn't dare to embarrass myself in front of a crowd."

After watching their skills from afar for a while, Bai Bufan did his classic fadeaway jump shot into the air and said enviously.

Although Lin Li and Bai Bufan were among the tallest in Class 4, Grade 10, Bai Bufan's basketball skills were very average, and Lin Li's were absolute garbage.

Lin Li only played with his classmates during P.E. class, and usually, when playing half-court 3v3, he was just dragged into the paint and told to grab rebounds because of his height.

Previously, due to his poor athletic ability, he couldn't even grab many rebounds. He didn't know what his level would be now.

As for the phrase, "You're so tall, why don't you play basketball?", Lin Li was sick and tired of hearing it.

Since they were just taking a walk anyway, and hearing Lin Li and Bai Bufan talking about it, the girls leading the way slightly changed direction and moved closer to the court. The music fountain started on the hour, so there was no rush.

Through the chain-link fence set up to stop balls from rolling onto the road, they watched the people inside sweating it out.

Number 24's movements were very clean, almost out of character for a street game.

"Damn winner in life. I wonder whose girlfriend that is, she's so pretty," Bai Bufan said with envy, jealousy, and hatred as he stared at a woman sitting on a bench by the court, who was suspected to be the girlfriend of someone playing.

"Why don't you cure your gynophobia first before worrying about that?" Lin Li said, amused.

"Is Feifei doing okay? The monthly exams are almost over, she should be coming out soon, right?" Bai Bufan's tone turned deep and solemn.

"Who is Feifei?" Bai Bufan hadn't lowered his voice much, so Qu Wanqiu asked curiously.

"Someone I will never see again."

"...I'm sorry."

Bai Bufan let out a long sigh of relief. Good thing she didn't ask further.

"Being good at basketball really is a huge plus," Ding Sihan rested her hands on the chain-link fence, looking at the court with a dreamy expression. "I think probably every girl has fantasized about this scenario: getting hit by a basketball thrown by a tall, handsome boy, and then he chooses to compensate her with his entire bright, sunny youth."

"Was it a shot put?" Lin Li asked.

Ding Sihan: "?"

The romance story instantly turned into a murder mystery.

"...A basketball!" Ding Sihan corrected.

"But a basketball wouldn't land him in prison, right? And for his entire youth? That punishment is way too severe," Lin Li was even more confused, feeling it was a grave injustice just thinking about it. "Ding Sihan, are you really unwilling to sign a letter of forgiveness? You're being a bit unreasonable."

Ding Sihan looked at Lin Li, her face turning red.

From anger.

She took a deep breath, pointed her finger at Lin Li with super force, and said furiously, "Lin Li! You atmosphere destroyer! You really don't understand romance at all! 'Compensating with his youth' is metaphorical, not literal! Your top priority right now is to read more romance stories and cultivate your emotional intelligence and sense of romance!

"Otherwise, a guy like you is destined to die alone!"

Chen Yuying's gaze followed the basketball in the distance, watching it swish through the net with a pleasant sound. Listening to the conversation coming from her left and right, she covered her mouth and laughed softly.

Lin Li was most likely doing it on purpose. After all, a Lin Li who wasn't being a troll wasn't Lin Li. Sihan actually knew this too. Despite looking furious right now, she wasn't actually repulsed at all. In private, she had spoken highly of Lin Li to Chen Yuying many times, finding him very interesting.

Thinking about it, keeping a creature like Lin Li around would indeed be quite fun, wouldn't it?

"Romance stories? I read them all the time. I have one fresh in my memory right now, want me to share it with you?" Lin Li pondered for a moment, then raised an index finger to the sky like an idea guy.

The three girls all turned to look at Lin Li. Although they knew perfectly well that nothing resembling a good romance story would likely come out of his mouth, they were still curious and urged, "Let's hear it."

"Once upon a time, there was a Bai Bufan who suffered from depression. He really liked a tree, so he confessed his love to the tree. But the tree didn't give a clear answer; it just kept hanging him along." Lin Li's romance story was very short, finished in a single sentence.

What a tragic love story.

Bai, Chen, Ding, Qu: "..."

Chen Yuying pursed her lips, suddenly turned her head, and buried her face in Ding Sihan's shoulder, her body trembling slightly.

Wuwuwu, all the good karma I've painstakingly accumulated over the past fifteen years is going to be completely deducted after getting close to Lin Li.

Lin Li is so annoying.

"If you're going to tell it like that, I have a romance story too," Bai Bufan also raised an index finger to the sky, transforming into an idea guy and drawing inferences. "Once upon a time, there was a piece of crap named Lin Li who loved exploring. While exploring, he met a snake. The snake really liked Lin Li, but Lin Li rejected its confession. However, the snake refused to give up, so it kept pestering him." (Translator's Note: "Pestering him" also means "constricting/strangling him").

Hearing this, Lin Li turned his head. His eyes met Bai Bufan's with a look of mutual appreciation, and the two bros tacitly high-fived.

I am not alone on this path.

"I have another romance story, do you guys still want to hear it?" After the three girls recovered, Lin Li continued asking with a beaming smile.

"No, we're not listening! What you're telling aren't romance stories at all!" Ding Sihan firmly covered her ears and shook her head.

Lin Li felt a bit unwilling. Not being allowed to tell it was too uncomfortable, so he added, "This time it's a fairy tale. The ending is the princess and the prince living happily ever after, and it's true, pure happiness, I swear."

Ding Sihan narrowed her eyes, looking at Lin Li with slight suspicion. She found it hard to imagine hearing such a fairy tale from Lin Li's mouth. Although she knew curiosity killed the karma, she couldn't help but nod:

"I'll trust you one more time. Tell it."

"One day, an old grandpa and an old grandma were rowing a boat on a lake. The old grandma accidentally fell into the water.

"At this time, a goddess rose from the lake and asked the old grandpa, 'Was it a princess or an old grandma who just fell in?' The old grandpa naturally answered honestly that it was an old grandma. The goddess was greatly pleased. 'You are truly an honest man. I shall give you the princess.'

"As soon as the princess appeared, she immediately kicked the old grandpa off the boat.

"At this time, a goddess rose from the lake and asked the princess, 'Was it a prince or an old grandpa who just fell in?' The princess also answered honestly that it was an old grandpa. The goddess was greatly pleased. 'You are truly an honest person. I shall give you the prince.'

"From then on, the princess and the prince lived happily ever after, until the end of time."

Lin Li, with a fairy-tale-like dreamy smile, slowly narrated this story with a happy ending.

Bai, Chen, Ding, Qu: "..."

The ending seemed happy enough, but something felt very wrong.

"What about the old grandpa and the old grandma?" Qu Wanqiu asked.

"Glub, glub, glub," Lin Li immediately made the onomatopoeia.

Qu Wanqiu: "..."

Glub glub glub my ass, I can already picture them sinking to the bottom.

Turning into pond mud to better feed the fishes.

"Ahhh!" Ding Sihan started slapping her own cheeks. "This is what I get for wanting to hear Lin Li's stories! This is what I get for wanting to hear Lin Li's stories! My mind has been polluted! I totally deserve this!"

"Teacher Ding, don't do this! Teacher Ding, don't do this!" Lin Li tried his best to stop her verbally, while physically cheering her on.

Slapping herself like that wouldn't kill anyone.

After watching for a while, the five of them left the public court. Before they left, someone even came up and asked Lin Li and Bai Bufan if they wanted to join in, probably because they were short on players.

There really were a lot of good people on the basketball court.

If the guy hadn't been staring at Chen Yuying while inviting them, Lin Li might have actually gone up and embarrassed himself.

This time, he managed to dodge an elbow.

The court was near the park, so it didn't take long to reach the park area.

The park was very lively, completely incomparable to the park in Lin Li's neighborhood. Many people had set up stalls here, selling food, decorations, toys, phone cases, and screen protectors. In the central stone-paved plaza, there were even those large toy cars for kids to drive.

Many children were in the plaza, launching flashing shuttlecocks or bamboo copters into the sky.

That realm of vibrant vitality and all things competing to thrive was right before their eyes.

Since their goal was to see the music fountain, the group crossed the plaza toward South Lake.

"There's a colored contact lens stall over there, want to go take a look?" The path to their destination was indeed fraught with thorns. Halfway across the plaza, Ding Sihan suggested it.

And so they changed lanes.

Lin Li and Bai Bufan followed along, but their eyes remained fixed on the large toy cars in the plaza. They exchanged a glance and nodded simultaneously: "Wanna drive."

Especially since you could crash into other kids while driving. If the seats weren't too small to fit their butts, they would have already excitedly gone over to bully the children.

What a pity.

Bai Bufan went to look at other stalls, while Lin Li's attention returned to the contact lens stall. After a few glances, he only felt confused.

Were these contact lens colors named by humans?

Shark Tears, Basque Ice Blue, Sky Gray, Neon Purple, Android Green.

Anyone who could read these names and imagine the corresponding contact lens color was truly a god.

"Which color do you guys think looks best?" Qu Wanqiu picked through them and curiously asked for everyone's opinion.

"Sky Gray."

"Peacock Brown."

"Roland Purple."

"Luosifen."

The gazes of the three girls and the stall owner all snapped toward the atmosphere destroyer, Lin Li.

He was the one who said Luosifen (River Snail Rice Noodle).

Lin Li raised his hands and took two steps back to show his surrender.

"Lin Li, Lin Li, come look, there's a story here!" Bai Bufan suddenly waved at Lin Li from a short distance away with great enthusiasm, signaling him to come over.

Lin Li walked over and asked, "What's up?"

"Look at this!" Bai Bufan lowered his voice and pointed at a stall.

It seemed to be a tailoring stall, taking orders for clothing alterations, selling fabric, and mending tears. What Bai Bufan was pointing at was a newly added, abrupt notice on the sign, which read: "When getting your crotch sewn, please wash them first before bringing them in. Thank you for your cooperation."

Lin Li stared at it, pondered for two seconds, and then lowered his voice and started laughing maniacally.

Behind every rule, there is an untold story.

When the tailor auntie bit the thread to break it, the sky must have collapsed for her.

(End of Chapter)