The Kingpin's Possession

82: Now More Than Ever

Kim:As Kim went back to the main mansion, he let his feet move on autopilot, his mind wandering and wondering how best to handle the situation and produce the most favorable outcome.

While he didn’t feel bad about the subtle deception he performed to get to the truth of it all, he was very much bothered about Kit’s entire situation. He was worried about his teerak—it was clear he was going through a lot, burdened with the fact that his father was threatening him and all his loved ones.

What’s worse was that he was also forced to endure a severe scarcity of confidants, so much that he resorted to seeking the help of the person he was least comfortable with.

Kim couldn’t help but feel partially responsible for bringing Kit into the dangers of this world. If he hadn’t dragged Kit and his sister to this life, would they have been safer now? Would they have been happier?

But then he started to rethink these notions. If he hadn’t taken them under his wing, Ayan would still have been leeching off of them, the two siblings left under the impression that their supposedly deceased father had little to do with their financial problems and that only the debt collectors were to be blamed.

The pavement was hard under his slippers. He suddenly had the random urge to cross the freshly mowed grass to get to the main mansion faster, but then he decided to resist it, thinking that the walk would be good for him.

Hands in his pockets, he thought about how much he hated Ayan for what he did. Some people should never become fathers. In fact, some people don’t deserve to become parents, period.

People who are selfish and difficult did not deserve the privilege of having children.

But was he even qualified to say such a thing? Was he himself even qualified to be a parent? Would I be a good father?Would I be a deserving parent despite who I am?The guards bowed their heads as he headed inside. The first thing he did was go upstairs to check on Kit, and in his room, he found that the tray of food he had Aawut bring up for Kit was still untouched.

But there he was, flung upon the bed, not even hidden comfortably beneath the covers, fast asleep from the exhaustion.

Had he been crying?Heart swelling, Kim fixed Kit up so he had the covers warmly over him. But he froze when something caught his eyes—hand marks around Kit’s neck, large and constricting. Clearly, it had been an intense grip because the mark still hadn’t faded until now.

Rage burned through his blood at the thought of the bastard who had inflicted such harm on his boy. He wanted to rip Ayan to bits, but he maintained enough sense to know that this situation could never be solved in a rush. He could not afford to be impulsive and abrasive.

He had to be meticulous and precise.

Resolved to catch the son of a bitch once and for all, he kissed Kit’s forehead; just a light peck, not enough to make him stir in his sleep, worried that he would end up doing something to disrupt it.

As he closed Kit’s door behind him, Kaya happened to pass by at the exact same moment. She had her eyebrows knitted the same way Kit usually did when we were concerned.

“Oh, hey,” she said breathlessly. “Is he alright? I wanted to check on him. I’ve been worried lately…”

“Is something the matter?” Kim asked, frowning.

Kanya shook her head. “No, nothing’s wrong…” she mumbled. “It was just that… oh, I don’t know. It sounds sad.”

“Well, I suggest you visit him tomorrow. He just fell asleep in there, so you should let him have this.” Kim shrugged, placing his hands back inside his pockets.

Kanya nodded slowly, agreeing with me. “You’re right,” she said with a soft sigh. “There’s always tomorrow. I should probably let him sleep first.”

“Right…”

It was the end of their conversation, but before Kaya could leave, Kim turned around and asked, “Kaya…do you think that I’ll be a good father?”

He hoped his voice didn’t sound too optimistic or vulnerable. But if there was someone he expected to be outright honest with him, without the fear of upsetting the mafia don, then it would be his best friend.

“Eh…?” Kanya looked taken aback by the question. “Are you kidding? Why wouldn’t you be?”

“I am a mafia don,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. “My life and hands are stained with blood. But even still, would I still have the right to be a father after everything? Would I really be able to make my son feel proud of the man I am?”

She sniffed, and Kim would have thought she was crying, if it weren’t for the lack of tears. Her eyes shone, though, and Kim wondered if it was only the light or if she was actually tearing up.

“Kim…it is the child who makes a person a parent,” she ended up saying, “so I cannot consider you a bad or good father yet until you have changed a few diapers and have your kids pee in your face.”

Perhaps she had meant for that statement to land as a joke, but it didn’t seem to lighten the mood. So she continued instead, “Quips aside, I’m sure you will be a wonderful father. Wanna know why?”

Kim didn’t verbalize his curiosity but waited for her to continue.

“I know this, because you had shown Kit and I more love and compassion than what we got from even our own family,” she expressed, “and I will forever be grateful to you for that. Plus, the fact that you love Kit to bits and your willingness to stand by him no matter what happens shows your utmost devotion to my brother. So, if you ask me, I’m not worried at all about you being a good father to the child I bear now, or for the ones you might have in the future. Does that answer your question?”

“I… It does, actually…” he mumbled, feeling relieved at the outcome of his questioning.

And if that exchange between him and Kanya had done something to him, it was that he was now even more determined to put an end to Ayan. Not just for Kit’s sake, but for his whole family who have suffered enough at his hands, and need an end to his deceit once and for all.