The Carrero Effect Trilogy

Chapter 26B

A little past noon, I get up and take him the files I’ve gone through, some contracts he needs to check, a new start-up he’s interested in investing in, and some minor publicity suggestions from Wilma. He’s glaring at a document in front of him, obviously unhappy with something contained within, and it makes me smile. Despite loving him as a boyfriend, the Jake I missed most was boss Carrero and his multitude of facial expressions when he was absorbed in something mundane. He has a face that can say a million things without opening his mouth when he isn’t maintaining his poker face, that is.

“Hey,” I mutter softly, and his chin lifts to look at me.

“Hey,” he replies with a smile, getting up and coming around the desk to pull me against him. I glance back to see if anyone is watching through the open door and catch Rosalie turning away quickly. I try to push myself away, but he only tightens his grip.

“Stop caring about what people will think or say.” He nuzzles my neck, making me melt against him too readily. I have no willpower when it comes to his touch.

“It’s easy for you to say that; you intimidate everyone. No one would say a thing about you for fear of your wrath. They all think I’m some gold-digging whore who’s bedding the boss to get my job back,” I sigh. He brings his face to mine, and it’s glaringly obvious he doesn’t like what I’ve said.

“I’ll fire anyone I catch saying that,” he growls seriously, his tone a tad harsh, and sadly, I know he means every word. I push away from him and straighten my clothes, making it clear that I need to go.

“I’ve got to go to Queens to meet Sarah,” I remind him. “I need more clothes and things from the apartment and sit down and talk to her properly before she goes to work.” He steps forward, closing the gap between us again, and kisses me on the mouth, taking a moment to linger with his lips against mine. He has one hand on my face, holding me steady, and slowly grazes my lips with a brush of his tongue. It’s hard not to react when he kisses me this way; the urge to grab and kiss him harder makes my fingers twitch. He finally steps back.

“Jefferson is already waiting,” he says as he straightens my jacket and smooths down my blouse, lingering over my cleavage with a naughty smile that gains him an indulgent one back.

What am I to do with you?

“I have a meeting with my lawyer while you’re gone; we’ll eat when you’re back, dolcezza.” His fingertips touch my lower lip tenderly, his eyes focused on mine.

“She isn’t going to be too pleased when I tell her you’ve asked me to move into your apartment full-time,” I add. We briefly talked about this last night, him adamant, and even though I want nothing more than to curl up in his bed every night, a part of me knows the thought still terrifies me. Sarah will be upset, too, at the speed this is all progressing. It’s all happened so suddenly; we are moving so fast. He shrugs that infuriating mannerism of his when he couldn’t care less about someone opposing what he wants.

“She has her live-in boyfriend, and you two rarely see each other because of your work schedules.” He moves back around his desk, sits in his chair, and picks up the file he’d thrown down. “It’s going to happen, Emma, whether now or in a month or two. You think I will be happy living apart for very long?”

“You don’t think this is moving too quickly?” I query. I tried to talk this through sensibly last night, but he closed me down every time, stubborn and set on what he wanted. Typical Jake, it’s always how he wants things, and I get no say unless it is to agree.

“Nope,” he responds quickly, “We practically lived together when you were just my PA. Why is this suddenly something scary? If you don’t want to do it, then just tell me.” He sits back in agitation, a childish pout-face appearing, indicating I’ve hurt his feelings. He pushes away the file, almost like a mini temper tantrum.

Little boy Carrero.

“I do want this,” I retort quickly, trying to smooth the ruffled feathers of my man-child. “It’s just … it’s serious, Jake. What if spending all this time working and living together makes you feel caged in … restless? I want to be sure that you’ve thought about it. I mean, you went from serious man-whore to a one-woman man overnight.” I move to the chair beside his desk and sit down, leaning closer so outside ears won’t be able to hear us. “I’m just worried this is so full-on so quickly that you’ll start missing being free and single.” I look away from him to the view outside the window, cursing myself for letting Miss Insecurity show face again. He sighs, then leans forward, so our heads are close; his hand comes to find mine and pulls it between us. He starts playing with my fingers between his thumb and forefinger, dwarfing my hand.

“You’ve got to stop thinking that way. And you’ve got to stop pinpointing the start of our relationship from the night I told you I loved you. I’ve loved you for a lot longer than that; I’ve wanted you for months. Our relationship started over a year ago, Emma, not a few weeks ago. There’s nothing rushed about where we are now; if anything, I’ve had the patience of a saint to wait this long to ask you.” He smiles his killer Casanova Carrero beam, and I return it; he knows how to play me so easily.

“I don’t want you to get fed up with me. Constantly being together can’t be healthy,” I add gently.

“It won’t be like that. We’re still enjoying being together in ways we never allowed ourselves; this is the honeymoon period. When we get comfier, we’ll do some things apart, like you and Sarah, Leila … Sophie. I still want to go out with Daniel. I have other friends that you probably wouldn’t be comfortable around, friends I really wouldn’t trust near you. I’ll still have to take solo business trips when things are hectic and you’re needed here. There are no rules; we make them up as we go, il Mio Amore.” He strokes my fingers, voice low and sincere.

I know he’s not saying it, but he also means trips to LA once a month, too.

“It makes no sense to me having you beside me at work, then you going home to Queens at night. I want you home with me to kick back and unwind. Here, we’re starting to get back into our roles as boss and PA. I want my girlfriend when we’re not working.”

“Sarah’s going to try and talk me out of it,” I sigh, watching him play with my fingers one by one, enjoying the sensation. “She’ll think we’re rushing things.” I look up at him and shake my head when he shrugs, his answer to everything. It’s so infuriating.

“I’m not going to force you, Emma. Go see her, collect what you need for this week anyway, then let me know what you decide. I won’t be mad if you decide not to, but I want you to know that it will happen eventually.” He moves forward and kisses me quickly before letting me get up to leave. I ruffle my fingers lightly through his hair, smiling at how he looks up at me, and our eyes instantly connect.

A face that could melt icebergs. And it’s all mine. Stubborn to a fault.

I turn and walk off, grabbing my bag as I pass my desk. I can sense his eyes on me, but I don’t look around. I like torturing him subtly; it makes me feel good to know I have a little power over him, too. Probably more than I realize; besides, he can be so commanding sometimes that he deserves it.

I want to move in with him, but I’m terrified. It’s a huge step for me, depending on someone else: his apartment, his things, his money, his furniture, his way!

I’ve always stood on my own two feet, and what if it all goes to hell and we break up? I can’t go crawling back to Sarah, and I’d have nowhere else to go.

I go into overdrive, thinking this all through as I make my way down to the underground car park to find Jefferson, with one of Jake’s four-by-fours, parked and waiting.

* * *

“Wow. Are you sure, Emma? It’s really fast!” Sarah remarks, sitting opposite me on the couch, her eyes wide in disbelief.

“I know, it’s just … he’s right, though. We’re working side by side, spending so much time on business, flying places, and sharing rooms … we dove straight into a committed relationship and missed out on dating and going slow. It’s what he wants, and as much as it scares me, I want it too. It just feels like this is how it should be,” I answer a little stiltedly. I’d rehearsed this on the drive over; she watches me for a long time, sipping her coffee and thinking.

“But? Come on. I can hear the hesitation.” She raises an eyebrow at me. I sigh and sink back on the cushions.

“But a part of me is terrified,” I admit, “A part of me is running for the hills screaming right now. I don’t even know why; I can’t begin to analyze it.” I put my coffee mug on the table and slide off my stilettos, letting them drop to the floor as I tuck my legs under me.

“No wonder. You spent your entire life being self-reliant, your own boss, keeping people at arm’s length, so they didn’t hurt you. He’s asking you just to throw that all in and put all your trust and hopes into your relationship after, like, a week. That’s crazy,” she says, waving her hand to emphasize the point.

“Except we’ve been in love for so much longer; I can see why this isn’t fast for him. He’s that kind of impulsive person. He wants, so he takes; he’s always had things his way,” I sigh and haul a cushion onto my lap, picking at the fringe in agitation.

“I think that’s just a male trait, to be fair.” Sarah puts her mug down and mirrors my pose with her legs underneath her. She’s dressed in chef whites, ready for her afternoon shift. “So, what are you going to tell him? What are you going to do?”

“I don’t want to hurt him. He’s always been right in the past when I’ve been scared to follow. Maybe this once, I should trust that he knows best.” I rub my cheeks with my palms, frustrated at myself for feeling so torn about something that should be so simple.

“I don’t want to get another roommate,” she pouts, “What about, you move in with him, but we leave your room available for you? Like, you can leave stuff here that you wouldn’t want to take, and maybe have it ready for staying over sometimes?” she asks hopefully, her eyes almost pleading. I know her too well; she’s offering me a way out of making a final decision, and she’s offering me a backup plan. She’s that girl who always helps me figure things out, that girl I love.

“I guess that could work,” I say slowly. “It’s not like Jake will expect me to pay for anything, so I can still contribute here like I’ve always done,” I shrug, annoyed at myself for adopting his mannerism. “So technically, I’ll have moved out, but I’ll still have the option of coming back? Maybe I could spend the odd night here to catch up,” I smile, warmed by her enthusiastic nod.

I like this plan. It gives me a third option: not living solely with him or her but choosing to stay with him unless I need an out.

I’ll have this safety net should he decide the full-on committed relationship with someone so emotionally messed up isn’t so great after all. That thought makes my stomach sink with a lurch.

“Okay, sorted!” Sarah says, “So, enough about that; I only have an hour before I have to get to work, and I want all the juicy gossip. What’s it like being in love with the Jake Carrero? How good is he in bed, really? I want all the dirty, minute details,” she giggles cheekily, and I sigh. I knew this was coming the second she got me alone.

* * *

I walk out of the elevator a couple of hours later; Jefferson has dropped me back at Carrero House and is taking most of my bags straight to Jake’s apartment. I’m disappointed to see Rosalie’s desk and Jake’s office are empty, and I check my watch. It’s only mid-afternoon, so I check my iPad on the desk, pull up the schedule, and see Rosalie has added in a meeting. Jake is meeting with the legal team overseeing the Hunter-Carrero ship merger; things must be moving along with the first hotel cruiser.

I sigh and make my way back to Rosalie’s desk to collect some letters and make myself busy. All the answer machines are on, the office is deathly quiet, and even the other secretaries on this floor seem to have disappeared. I miss him already, and it makes me smile. I’ve only been gone a couple of hours, and already I’m impatient to see him again, to feel his hands on me and kiss me the way he does. I keep telling myself that it’s only been a week, that I shouldn’t be this dependent on him so soon or even at all. I’m falling too far and too deep, yet something inside me tells me to let go, trust him for once, and go with it. See where this goes.

* * *

Absorbed in an email I’m typing, I hear them finally return; it’s late in the day, and I ended up eating lunch alone when hunger made me feel faint.

“You missed an epic meeting,” Jake’s voice smooths over me deliciously. He dumps files on my desk and comes around to haul me out of my seat by the arm. He sits down on my chair, and I squeal as he tugs me back on top of him in a heap across his knee like a child as he leans back casually and swings the chair. I have to hold on for dear life. He grins childishly and lifts his legs, planting his feet on the desk, so I’m tipped closer to him, my face ending up nose to nose with him. He raises his eyebrows suggestively and then softly kisses my mouth. “I missed you, sexy.”

“Stop misbehaving,” I laugh while trying to push myself upright. He’s always so inappropriately public. I should give up trying to conceal the things he does from the floor staff; it’s like trying to swim against the tide.

“What did I miss?” I challenge playfully, giving up the fight and instead lying in his embrace, simply happy to be back in his arms while sliding my own around his neck to nuzzle closer.

“My father had a massive tantrum and glared at everyone silently throughout the meeting. Epic in every way,” he grins, obviously amused. “He still hates the fact I put this merger in place. It didn’t help that Daniel’s father was there. If looks could kill … I felt sorry for the poor guy, though.”

“Ouch,” I respond, remembering that Jake told me Carrero had an affair with Daniel’s mother years ago. The two men are still at war over it even now.

“Apart from that, everything is going to plan. They’re moving to start production on the first two ships. It’s a lengthy process, maybe two years or more, before launching our first five-star floating spa and hotel. Better book ourselves a suite now.” He can’t hide his excitement, and I congratulate him with a kiss, but as usual, he takes the opportunity to turn it into a full-on passionate embrace lasting minutes. Finally breaking away, he tilts me back to him so we’re nose to nose again.

“So? Are you going to break my heart and tell me you only brought enough clothes for a couple of nights?” he asks seriously, his eyes coming to mine; there’s something almost apprehensive about the look he’s giving me, always disarming me with that lost boy look in those deep green eyes.

“I packed up anything I want … everything I need … to stay with you indefinitely,” I smile softly, grinning as his face breaks into his famous ‘happy as Larry’ smile. “The stuff I would otherwise need to put into storage I left in my room until I decide what to do with it, with the understanding that I pay Sarah rent for it instead … in case you ever kick me out,” I giggle as he pulls me back to his mouth for a celebratory peck on the lips.

“There’s more chance of you leaving me, Bella.” He swings us back in the chair like it’s a rocker, and it creaks miserably under our combined weight. “Want to call it a day and go home with me to celebrate? There’s a huge hot tub with our name on it, and I haven’t seen you naked in seven hours; I’m getting withdrawals.” He pulls his feet off the desk, standing with me in his arms.

“Do you intend to carry me off regardless of my answer?” I laugh.

“Pretty much.” He plants a chaste kiss on the corner of my mouth and puts me on my feet. “I need to grab some files from my desk and my laptop. Get ready to go. Home it is. There are some advantages to being your boss,” he orders with a wink before stalking off to his open doorway with a smile.