The Bloodforged Kin

Chapter 240 - 234: Cass - A Trial of Decisions

The jaguar was next, and every bit as frustrating as the wolves - if for a different reason. He couldn't get close to it, even with his speed. It was a silent predator in life and even more so in death, able to turn off its glow at will. Over an hour of stalking it proved fruitless and Cass thumped down onto a fallen tree in irritation. He was contemplating his options when a soft glow from behind cast a shadow on the ground in front of him. His fight, flight, or freeze reflex kicked in and Cass froze, as still as a mouse that sees the shadow of a descending hawk. The light passed through him and Cass got a burst of sensations as it did - Hunt. Prey. Kill. Eat. Hunt.

That was it! It was useless to hunt a predator - he needed to be its prey. He suddenly understood that he would only remain in contact with it as long as it was standing over him, ready to bury its teeth in his throat. Fear and primal emotions surged in him - this was everything he was trying to overcome. Everything he didn't want to be. Even now the light was behind him again, and every part of him screamed to run.

I am not prey! I am not weak!

Even in his mind the words came out like the scared squeak of a mouse in a burrow as the snake closed in. He fought the urge to run, locking his muscles in place with all the will he could muster. The light passed through him again and he felt its frustration. It didn't need to stalk him, it needed to overpower him. It needed him at its mercy. That was all that would satisfy it.

Cass felt sick to his stomach as he slid off the log, crawling to the ground and flipping onto his back. He began hyperventilating as the glow approached, the jaguar's soul painted in all the detail it had in life. He began to quiver as it placed a paw onto his chest. Cass knew it was incorporeal, his eyes saw it pass through his body, but it held a soul-crushing weight that made his heart stutter an irregular beat in his chest. Bile filled his throat even as it closed up when the jaguar's head lowered towards his. Cass showed it the path and its eyes flicked to it, then back to him. It knew it was there - it always had, it just didn't care. Cass's hand twitched on the rod.

Do it! Stop it! Don't let it do this! His thoughts screamed at him.

"Show it that you are stronger!" Gabriel's voice filled his head.

"No, son, it can't hurt you. Let it get what it wants, it costs you nothing."

"It gains you nothing! Think of the power!"

"It just wants to go home. Guide it there, even if it's scary."

Cass closed his eyes and screamed, indecision and fear warring within him. He couldn't feel the jaguar, and yet, he thought he could. It was too much - no one should have to live with this kind of fear! He swung the rod.

He opened his eyes and the jaguar was gone. He stared at the rod, but its power hadn't grown. The jaguar must have gotten what it wanted from him and left. Cass should have felt contentment in that, but he didn't. He felt dirty, used, and scared. The stench of cold sweat irritated his nostrils and the ripples of fear still coursed through his body. He punched the ground again and again, angry tears falling with each strike. Eventually he climbed to his feet and collected himself, glad that no one had seen his tantrum.

Or could they? He didn't know how trials worked - was anyone watching this? Judging him? The thought made him angry, a cold rage swelling inside of him. How dare they put him in that kind of position, only to laugh at him for it? He was trying to be a good guy and they just sat up there, laughing as he almost pissed himself with fear? Laying on his back like a good little prey animal as he allowed something to have that kind of power over him? He could have used the rod in the beginning - he was fast enough to have tagged it as soon as it lunged for him. He could have played it smart and waited until it pounced…

He recognized the spiral and forcibly stopped his thoughts. No more of this bull crap, he thought. From now on you all get one chance. He was off at a run, looking for something to take his anger out on.

He found the monkeys next and was not in the mood for their games. He hated them in life and hated them even more in death. They knew what he was trying to do - he showed them the path and they saw it - they all did. They understood, they just refused. They were having too much fun playing with him, their defiance gleeful. They wanted to stay, to play their little games forever. A small part of him realized that he could convince them to move on by telling them that there was even more fun and games on the other side, but he was out of patience. Every time he approached they scattered, threw intangible feces at him, laughing in his face every time he managed to touch one.

He was done being laughed at. They were too clever, too stubborn. It all felt so pointless and such a waste of time. He just wanted to get out of this stupid level and get to the next phase. Every second was another failure. He was done being laughed at.

"You don't deserve my patience! You had your one chance!" Cass's yell was met with chittering laughter, infuriating the boy even more. Lightning lit his body and Cass moved through the trees like inevitable doom. When he left their woods the Soul Catcher had become a dull white, glowing faintly in his hand.

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Crocodiles came next and Cass didn't even waste time on them. The instant he touched one of the unmoving shapes he understood - they were patient hunters. In life they could sit under the water for days, barely moving, barely breathing. In death they were content to sit there forever, waiting for the right moment. Their instincts lingered, even in death. Cass understood that this was part of the trial - he was supposed to find what motivated each of them and help them achieve it. He even understood what the trial was trying to do - would he take the easy route to greater power or would he help those who needed it, even the stubborn and hostile ones, all without having anything to gain from it? He knew that if he took the time to truly understand these crocodiles, he'd be able to find their motivation and help them move on.

He just didn't care anymore. His patience was at an end and he'd given them one chance when he'd shown them the path. They'd chosen this, not him, and their fate was their own fault. Their glows disappeared as Cass waded through the fetid water.

The zoo was practically empty now, and the Soul Catcher was glowing a bright white, its power almost completely full. He explored one of the last enclosures and found a herd of elephants milling about in a silent circle. They swayed gently, their trunks reaching towards a small, fallen form in the center.

A baby elephant was there, confused, bleating with anguish. It didn't know what to do and the herd couldn't make it understand. How was Cass going to guide a soul that couldn't understand what was happening - that was so saturated with fear that it couldn't accept the guidance of those that loved it? He approached the baby, touching it gently. His soul was inundated with waves of violent fear and panic and he jerked backwards with a gasp, the herd watching him hopefully. He tried again but the ever-present fear rocked him backwards again. Cass turned his eyes to the expectant herd.

"What am I supposed to do? If you can't reach it, how can I? I can't communicate with it! You need to help it, you're its family!"

The eyes that met him were pleading, but silent. They needed him to do this. They could have moved on at any point, but refused to leave their scared child behind. More tears fell as Cass paced.

"How do I do this? How do I help it?" He turned to face the baby, failure filling his heart with a spiritual sludge. "HOW DO I HELP YOU? WHY WON'T YOU JUST LISTEN! JUST GO WITH THEM! JUST FOLLOW THEM! WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID??" He screamed and the baby bleated harder, its eyes wide and rolling as it stepped away from him. Cass was waving his arms frantically as he stalked the baby around the pen. "JUST GO! JUST GO DO IT! YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO, JUST GO! WHAT DO YOU EVEN WANT? JUST GO!"

Cass moved to shove the baby, his hands passing through it, forgetting that he was still holding the Soul Catcher.

As the baby elephant was pulled into the rod with a terrified scream the elephants began to trumpet their grief and fear. "No, no, no! It was an accident! I didn't mean to, I was frustrated! I'm sorry, it was an accident!"

He covered his ears against their bleats - he could feel the heartbreak in each one. The sound was crushing his soul and he couldn't bear it. His shame turned to anger. "Why didn't you save him? Why did you need me to do it? He was your child, you should have saved him! You should have been there for him! This is YOUR fault - all of your faults! YOU did this to him, not me! STOP. CRYING! STOP!"

They didn't stop.

"Just move on! Go! He's gone, there's nothing here for you anymore - just go!"

They didn't go, their grief too great for them to find eternal happiness. Cass just wanted them to stop, to give him a rest from it all. Why wouldn't they let him succeed? Why wouldn't they just stop?"

They didn't stop, so Cass made them.

He ran through the night, the wind whipping tears across his face. He knew where the exit was now, and he wanted to get out of this damned trial as quickly as he could. He was so lost in the memories of the herd that he didn't notice the glowing lights at the trial's exit. He skidded to a stop, looking around him in wonder.

There were people there, a few dozen of them. Men and women mostly, but a few children.

"Did you die here?" Cass gasped. There were silent nods and Cass realized that they couldn't speak, the discovery infuriating him as he thought back to how the elephants were allowed to bleat. He hated The System then - it was obviously trying to torture him. It let him hear their cries, but wouldn't let these people tell them what they needed. He'd have to touch each of them to find out their motivations. He took a step forward and stopped, their hopeful expressions growing confused.

What would happen when he touched a person? Sure, he'd be able to see their soul, but would they be able to see his? Was it a two-way street? Would they see who he was, deep inside? Would they feel his motivations and, more importantly, his fear?

The vulnerability of that thought crashed into him. Of course The System would put this in place. Of course it would force him to let others see the deepest, darkest parts of him. Was he supposed to weather their judgments of him? Be okay with their looks of derision and scorn? Was he just supposed to be okay with what they thought of him? He didn't even know these people - who were they to judge him? What gave them the right to see his innermost fears and decide who he was because of it? What gave them the right?

He scanned their faces, looking at each one. "I'm sorry," he said, "but you're already dead. You all did this to yourself."

One woman reached forward and mouthed "Help us!"

Cass wanted to, he really did. Maybe he could help the kids? But no, they had died because they were weak. There was nothing more to do for them. Sure, they could go to the afterlife, but then what were their deaths worth? Maybe they could serve some purpose in death that they never served in life.

Their eyes widened in fear and a few put their hands over their mouths. Mothers and fathers pushed their ghostly children behind them when they saw his face go hard.

"I'm sorry, but you failed because you were weak. You had your chance. I'm going to give you another though - you're going to help me."

They made no noise as he moved through them, but Cass heard their screams anyway.