novelraw Chapter 183 : Chapter 183
Chapter 183 : Chapter 183
Chapter 183 - The Executioner's Dilemma (7)
For a lifetime, I praised a false god, but only after shifting my gaze slightly could I see its wrongness.
I hated those who abandoned me, yet at the same time, deep in my heart, I couldn't truly hate them.
But even after facing the true god, I am slaughtering the pitiful lambs struggling in original sin.
‘It’s a funny thing.’
I could only mock my own contradiction with a dry laugh.
To say that I can't truly hate them, and yet I'm cutting them down.
But I had one point of rebuttal.
A worn-out excuse that this was an unavoidable act, done for the sake of 『Ad Astra』.
And a confession that I too, bore the form of a flawed human.
That was the gist of it.
‘I, too, am nothing more than a weak human.’
Though I sincerely wished for pity, I, too, as a flawed human, could not abandon my sense of justice.
To be precise, I couldn't abandon the honor I had as that brilliant knight.
I wish for evil to have its just retribution.
I wish for good to have its just reward.
I sincerely wish for all knights to walk the right path.
Therefore, I cut down the knight who walked the wrong path.
I know.
This is a contradiction.
I know that I myself am committing evil.
I have stained my hands with the blood of countless people, and among them were not only the wicked.
Moreover, I could not deny the reality that I was holding hands with the wicked.
However, I sincerely believe that this is something someone must do.
For the era of a god who truly pities humanity, a bloody path to the future must be drawn.
‘All for the future.’
To open the era of a truly perfect god, to commit countless evils for the countless goods that will exist in that era.
Yes.
This is a contradiction and an evil.
It would be fine to dismiss it as the ramblings of a madman who has fallen completely into evil.
However.
‘However, may all that God desires come to pass.’
All the evil committed in that process, we will embrace it and fall into hell.
That wish alone, I was hoping for with all my heart, without a doubt.
***
- I believed you would come.
I repeat.
- Why do you stand against us?
In the repetitions that have surpassed several hundred and reached a thousand, I listen to the story I've grown tired of.
- Is it your desire to protect the world? Does that noble heart whisper to you to wield your sword?
I'm sick of it. With empty eyes, I wait for the end of that story in vain.
- If not that, is it the pride of a knight? Does that pride tell you to protect the world no matter the sacrifice?
And, to that question, I answer with nothing but endless tedium and hatred.
-I simply despise you all.
Looking back, it was a completely different answer from the first time I faced Grændal.
But it was undeniable that this one was closer to the more fundamental answer.
Clang-!
The battle repeats again. I wear Grændal down.
Kaang, kang-!
I pour out all the skill within me, dragging the enemy into the mud.
And.
Crunch.
Tang-!
As always, after giving up my left hand, I lure Grændal into a trap.
A hand crushed beyond recognition, and the pain felt from that hand.
It's vivid. The sensation of fresh blood draining from the wound as my biological signals scream.
But it was only a sensation of pain, not suffering.
I know it might seem like a bizarre thing to say.
But, it was an unavoidable fact.
I heal.
And I fight again.
I trap Grændal in that pattern, ingrained in my mind through countless repetitions.
Ssssk-
I parry.
I dig in.
I dodge.
Tang-!
I fire.
…….
[ System : You have overcome deaths. ]
In the countless repetitions so far, the destination had been set.
To be hit by his 『Space Slash』 and, through death, to understand that technique.
However, for this life alone, I thought of taking a slightly different path.
Clang-!
As always, I parry his sword strike to break his posture.
Perhaps it was the fruit of practice and repetition through death, but even as I struck away the sword of a Master Knight who would be among the top tier, my awareness was clear.
‘What are the surrounding conditions?’
It was a situation where I had him backed against a wall.
The structures of the old bell tower were a mess from the aftermath of my battle with Grændal, and this wall was no exception.
There was a gaping hole in the wall, and beyond it, the ruined village, the forest, and a snowfield covered in a thick layer of snow were visible.
‘What is the best move now?’
It was certainly a repetition of what I had been doing so far.
Repeating the pattern that continued from a non-existent past, to push him until I finally understood his technique.
My reason was telling me so, but…….
‘No.’
Deep inside my head, something denied that conclusion.
And that something was telling me.
To throw myself beyond the countless repetitions, into uncertainty.
‘Now.’
Perfect timing.
Thwack-!
I couldn't perfectly understand the action I had just taken myself.
But one thing was certain: I had grabbed the collar of Grændal, whose posture was broken, and leaned my center of gravity forward.
Yes, beyond the collapsed wall of the bell tower.
“……!”
A never-before-seen panic appeared in the executioner's eyes.
Is this really an effective method?
I don't know, but, well.
I could confidently say that the sight of him flustered was definitely worth this spontaneous action.
Ah.
Come to think of it, what kind of expression am I making right now?
The curiosity that had come to mind a few times before suddenly reared its head again.
Though I couldn't find the answer this time either.
***
I'm falling.
From the top of the five-story bell tower, to the floor of the vast, sprawling snowfield.
A biting cold, a bone-chilling wind, and a somewhat pleasant feeling of falling.
The moment of the fall would surely be as short as the blink of an eye, but as I fell, the static scenery of the snowfield filled my vision.
And, after a very brief moment.
Thump-!
The sound signaling the fall was also as expected.
“Kugh…….”
Even though the thick snow below absorbed the impact, and even though I had a body that far surpassed that of an ordinary human…… since I had already consumed a considerable amount of stamina and durability, the damage from the fall was painful.
‘It feels like my whole body has been beaten.’
That sensation would have been the same for Grændal.
“……Ha.”
Grændal, who had been thrown off by the impact of the fall, let out a dry laugh as he pushed himself up from a short distance away.
“Your thoughts, I just can't seem to read them.”
And was there some admiration mixed in the following words, or was he just dumbfounded?
“⋯⋯Is that so?”
It didn't really matter, though.
“On the contrary, I can see right through your thoughts as if they were in the palm of my hand.”
“Hoh.”
Grændal, who had straightened his posture with relative ease compared to me, seemed quite interested in those words.
“Then let me hear it. These thoughts of mine that you see.”
“Very well.”
I answered Grændal's words concisely before pushing myself up from my seated position.
Crack.
A sound came from inside my body, signaling that something was wrong with my bones. It was probably a mess.
Nevertheless, I didn't show my injuries and just got up with a calm expression.
I was already a master at not revealing my weaknesses.
“You are begging.”
And, I opened my mouth.
“Begging for pity from a god⋯⋯ haha, you're begging.”
I tried to maintain my composure, but I couldn't hold back the sneer that escaped at the end of my words.
“⋯⋯.”
Seeing his expression harden at those words, and looking at the way he lived, I couldn't help but sneer.
Perhaps the man himself was just laughable.
“Did you say that the knights have forgotten their vows, and their honor has fallen to the ground?”
What the virtues of a knight are, how a knight should be, what the merits of a knight are.
None of that mattered. I didn't even have a shred of interest. To me, being a knight was just a convenient title to use to survive.
“You're going to judge and execute knights? You? Because the knights have forgotten their purpose?”
However, on the topic that a knight should not be like that, I had one conviction.
“I'll ask you one thing.”
It was a matter of a knight's reason for existence.
“Is a knight one who begs for pity, or one who fights back?”
“⋯⋯.”
Astonishment, anger, confusion.
Mixed with various other emotions, Grændal was making an expression so subtle it was hard to describe.
The only certain thing was that he was completely unable to answer this question.
“You bastard⋯⋯.”
He was just gritting his teeth, glaring at me.
‘Pathetic.’
When I first faced him at the entrance of Ailton Hall, I felt a sense of despair from him, as if I were facing a towering snow mountain that I could never overcome.
Was it because I couldn't understand him, and therefore feared him?
But he was just this kind of person.
“To think that the one who would punish knights is such a bundle of contradictions and a weak human.”
My bones, on the verge of shattering, are screaming at every joint.
My muscles repeated contraction and expansion to their limits, as if warning that they would soon snap.
The amount of bleeding was also unusual. The sensation of that red, sticky, hot liquid flowing down my head and body was vivid.
In other words.
It was the best condition.
Clack.
I tightened my grip on the sword again, and Grændal also took a stance to rush at me.
Glaring at me while gritting his teeth.
A perfect standoff.
It was a touch-and-go situation, but something I wanted to try suddenly came to mind.
“Ah, by the way, was it like this⋯⋯?”
With a mumble, I raise my sword towards Grændal.
If it were just that, it might have looked like a stance preparing for the final battle, but⋯⋯.
“Ha.”
I mutter with a burst of dry laughter.
“To the sinner who has forgotten the knight's vow, judgment.”
“⋯⋯!”
The eyes of the man who had just been glaring at me flew open with a flash of anger at being fundamentally mocked.
And, he shouted.
“You bastard⋯⋯!!!”
Tak-!
He is rushing at me, sword in hand.
The situation is evenly matched, a dire situation where both are covered in wounds.
Now.
All conditions are perfectly prepared, so⋯⋯.
‘Let’s end this.’
With that thought, I ran towards the center of the silent snowfield.