novelraw Chapter 85 The Pain That Erodes the Bones
Chapter 85 The Pain That Erodes the Bones
Gu Yanshen's aura enveloped Lu Xiran instantly, pulling her into his arms.
He rested his chin on the top of her head, "Ranran..."
It was like a whisper, or a plea, "Don't scare me."
Lu Xiran wanted to respond, but a sharp pain in her abdomen made her gasp. She could only grip his suit jacket tightly, "Uncle...my belly..."
Gu Yanshen loosened his distance slightly and looked down.
The world fell completely silent at that moment.
Dark red bloodstains spread across the hem of her off-white skirt, like poppies bursting in the snow, so glaring that it made his vision go black for a moment.
The scene from five years ago brutally shattered the barrier of reason.
He opened his mouth, but no sound came out. After three attempts, he finally managed to squeeze out two words from his torn throat: "Don't be afraid."
But he himself was trembling all over.
A wave of overwhelming fear washed over him like icy seawater, rising from his feet to his head in an instant. Gu Yanshen could even hear the sound of his own blood freezing. Almost mechanically, he sat back in the driver's seat, started the car, and dialed Xue Jingyan's number: "Jingyan... Ranran is bleeding..."
His voice was choked with uncontrollable sobs.
He hung up the phone and took her hand again. Her fingertips were cold, yet trembling slightly.
"It's okay, Ranran." He repeated these words, whether to comfort her or to convince himself.
He gripped the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles turning white.
Gu Yanshen slammed on the gas pedal, and the sports car turned into a black lightning bolt on the streets in the dead of night.
The automatic doors of the emergency room closed in front of him, swallowing Lu Xiran's figure. Gu Yanshen stood in the middle of the cold corridor, suddenly feeling a little short of breath.
When Lin Chen arrived, he saw Gu Yanshen slowly sliding to the ground, his back against the wall. This man, who always stood tall and in control, was now hunched over, his face buried deep in his palms. His shoulders were trembling violently, like a withered leaf on the verge of breaking in a storm.
"Speaking deeply..." Lin Chen squatted down.
Gu Yanshen's eyes were frighteningly red, but his face was expressionless.
That kind of extreme calm is more terrifying than a collapse.
Gu Yanshen didn't look up, but asked in a hoarse voice, "How long has she been inside?"
"Twenty minutes." Xue Jingyan glanced at his watch.
"How many times has this happened?" he asked hoarsely, as if asking Lin Chen, but also as if asking himself. "How many times have I let her get hurt right under my nose?"
Lin Chen was speechless.
Half an hour felt like an eternity.
The emergency room door finally opened.
Gu Yanshen rushed over too fast and almost bumped into Dr. He who came out.
"Mr. Gu..." Dr. He chose his words carefully, "Miss Lu is not in immediate danger, but..."
The word "speak" was squeezed out from between his teeth.
"She has a special constitution, her endometrium is very thin, and this time the bleeding was too heavy..." Dr. He paused for a moment, "It will probably be very difficult for her to conceive again in the future."
Gu Yanshen blinked, as if he didn't understand. He took a step back, then another, until he bumped into Lin Chen.
A moment later, he walked toward the ward, his steps unsteady, nearly falling several times. Lin Chen tried to help him, but he gently pushed her away.
"Leave me alone," he said.
The door to the ward was ajar. He stood outside and saw Lu Xiran lying on the hospital bed through the crack in the door. An IV tube was connected to the back of her hand, and her face was so white it was almost transparent.
He stared for a very long time, until his eyes were sore and aching, before gently pushing the door open and going in.
Every step felt like walking on a knife's edge.
He knelt down beside the bed—not sitting, but kneeling.
His knees slammed heavily onto the marble floor with a dull thud. He took her hand, the one without the IV drip, and pressed her cold fingers against his face.
"I'm sorry..." His voice trembled uncontrollably, "Ranran... I'm sorry..."
Hot tears fell onto the back of her hand, and he frantically tried to wipe them away, but the more he wiped, the more tears flowed. Finally, he lowered his head, his forehead against the edge of the bed, his shoulders trembling violently. Suppressed sobs squeezed from deep within his throat, like a wounded beast licking its wounds, each sob more desperate than the last.
"I shouldn't have met you... I shouldn't have loved you... I shouldn't have dragged you into the abyss of the Gu family..." he murmured incoherently, "From the very beginning... from the very beginning I was afraid this day would come... but I was greedy... I was greedy for your beauty..."
He knelt in that position for a long time until his legs went numb, then gently lowered her hand and carefully tucked the blanket in.
As he stood up, something in his eyes went completely extinguished.
"Take good care of her," he said to Xue Jingyan, his voice calm and even.
"Where are you going?" Lin Chen stopped him.
Gu Yanshen looked at the window at the end of the corridor. Dawn was approaching, and his appearance was reflected in the glass—his tie was crooked, his suit was wrinkled and stained with blood, and he looked like a defeated deserter.
"I'm going to take care of some things," he said.
"Gu Yanshen!" Lin Chen lowered his voice, "If she wakes up and can't see you—"
"Then don't let her see me." Gu Yanshen interrupted him, his eyes as cold as ice that had been frozen for a thousand years. "From today onwards, she will never want to see me again."
"What are you going to do?" Lin Chen had a bad feeling.
Gu Yanshen did not answer.
He walked straight into the emergency exit, descending the stairs step by step, his gait steady and unlike the man who had just collapsed. Until he got into his car and closed the door—
"Damn it!" he growled, slamming his fist on the steering wheel.
The piercing whistle of the horn cut through the night sky.
The sports car engine roared like a trapped beast on the streets in the early morning. Gu Yanshen floored the accelerator, rolled down the windows, and felt the biting wind slap his face like a blow.
He needs this pain, he needs physical agony sharper than heartache to prove that he is still alive.
He didn't turn on the lights in the villa on the cliff.
Moonlight streamed in through the French windows, casting pale patches of light on the floor. He walked to the liquor cabinet, grabbed a bottle of whiskey, and chugged it straight from the bottle. The strong liquor burned his throat, but it couldn't melt the ice in his chest.
Halfway through his drink, he suddenly swung the bottle and smashed it hard against the glass cabinet opposite.
Clang!
The deafening crash of shattering glass echoed through the empty villa. He didn't stop, grabbing anything he could smash—a celadon vase in the entryway, a crystal ornament in the living room, and decorations on the TV cabinet. The sound of breaking glass continued unabated.
Lin Chen stood at the door, not stopping them, but just watching silently.
When the room was in complete disarray, Gu Yanshen finally stopped.
He knelt amidst the shards of metal, then suddenly bowed his head and began to gag violently. His stomach was empty; he could only vomit a bitter, bile-like liquid mixed with the smell of blood.
"Tell me," he finally calmed down, his voice hoarse as if sandpaper had been scraped across his face, "first Grandma, then the children... who's next?"
Lin Chen remained silent.
"I thought I could protect her." Gu Yanshen pushed himself up from the floor and walked to the French windows. "I kept her by my side, had people guarding her, and gave her the best of everything in the world... I thought that would be enough to protect her."
He turned around, his eyes filled with a desolate emptiness: "But I know it, yet I refuse to admit it, that her danger comes from me."