novelraw Chapter 973 [Chapter 5] 58
Chapter 973 [Chapter 5] 58
In the empty house, apart from his own hoarse voice that was almost unrecognizable, it was the sound of the wind passing through the walls of the dilapidated house and the cracks in the windows.
He could hear his heavy breathing, and his heartbeat that seemed to be going through his chest and jumping directly to the ground; however, he couldn't hear her heartbeat, her breathing, or her heartbeat. Seeing her kind of voice that often carries a faint smile and the ending is briskly raised upwards, just by listening to the voice, one can feel the joyful breath emanating from her whole body.
[Oh, what a pity, Severus.I thought you thought it was a good dance too. 】
[I thought that no matter how hopeless a liar is, he deserves a wonderful Christmas Eve. 】
【Maybe you don't believe it, but I care about your soul more than you can imagine, Severus. 】
【Your soul is flawless, and so is the future—even if you complete the task entrusted to you by Dumbledore. 】
[Are you afraid, Severus? 】
【It's me.Severus, everything I do is because of my own decisions. 】
……
His mind was in turmoil.Her voice sounded again and again, and countless words she had said surged up in his mind, intertwined in a chaotic manner, which made him feel dizzy and bewildered.
Those words she said at different times, he originally thought that he was full of boredom when he heard them, and he would forget them as soon as they entered his ears; but now he found that his disobedient brain had remembered these words too much. Clearly, even her demeanor when she said these words, the expression on her face, the tone of voice in her words, as well as that gentle smile and slightly bent eyes——I remember very clearly.
He shook his head hard, trying to shake those chaotic voices out of his mind temporarily—he had more important things to deal with and confirm in front of him—but those sentences refused to leave him just like that Instead, it tangled up like a ball of yarn that was wound into a ball and knotted into a dead knot. In the end, it all turned into one sentence, one voice——
"Severus! Severus! …"
It was the sound of her calling his name.She'd called him that countless times over the past 20 years; unlike Beryl—the real Lily—she rarely called him "Sev," and mostly took the trouble to call him by his full name.He suddenly couldn't remember when she gave up pretending to be the real Lily, and stopped calling him "Sev."He searched his memory blankly, and finally found an example - a trace of memory -
[Come on, Sev.Let's kiss. 】
Snape:! ! !
That should be a half-joking sentence due to the situation.However, at this moment, he suddenly jumped out of the water in his memory, but it was as if he had been given a blow to the head, and there was a heavy hit on his forehead, which made him stare at him for a while.
In an instant, the scene and environment when she said these words emerged in his mind; Snape's face turned green and white, and he tightly clenched his five fingers, as if in a short period of time. I dare not act, for fear that if I act, I will do something unimaginable to myself——
In memory, she was always so bold.However, her boldness and Beryl's straightforwardness and bravery seem to belong to two completely different categories.
Beryl—the real Lily Evans—was fully worthy of the name "Gryffindor" that the Sorting Hat called out the moment it touched her head.She is frank, frank, brave, enthusiastic, jealous, and will not hide her likes and dislikes; although sometimes she may be a little too frank and not good at understanding the helplessness and plight of others, but that kind of small weakness does not detract from her character. The flower of Lanffindor, always standing in the light and exuding brilliance.
Unlike her, however, the later Lily—whom he didn't even know her real name—was more cunning and quicker than Beryl, like she was hanging in the Muggle Studies office. The Cheshire cat in the portrait outside the door often hides its figure, leaving only a meaningful smile, is as slippery, light, cunning and intelligent, and even a little crazy, bold, ingenious and unpredictable Yes—although she doesn't want to admit it, she is indeed more understanding, more flexible, and has endlessly wonderful ideas; at the same time, she is also better at thinking from the standpoint of others, and knows how to balance "pursuing results" " and the relationship between "process justice"...
Thinking about it now, she is full of contradictions, which makes her character more multi-faceted and unfathomable than Beryl's, making one involuntarily want to find out what lies deeper behind that warm smile— —
...However, even if he found out that he had been observing her all the time, and came to many different conclusions, and discovered many aspects of her character, he didn't know her well enough as he imagined... However, what's the use of those now?
There was a long silence, and there was only a wheezing sound in the room, which was like the sound of an old locomotive when it was struggling to climb a slope.It took Snape a moment to realize that the unpleasant gasping sound was coming from himself.
His nostrils, like his throat, seemed to be clogged with tears and grief.He felt himself suffocating and had to open his mouth to breathe; and that was how the wheezing sound like a broken bellows came.
Tears blurred his vision.He knew clearly now that she was dead.There was no need to rush over to touch her icy body and pale face. He also knew that this person—to be precise, this soul—would never exist in this world again.
Unlike himself who clung to Beryl's body and wept bitterly 16 years ago, Snape found himself not rushing in to hug the body that he had been trying to make her quit so that it could be returned to Beryl. The shell of the body, the urge to cry bitterly without reason.But he also found himself as if his spine was suddenly taken away by some unknown force, and the remaining bones were not enough to support the weight of his body; he slumped on the ground and fell in front of her feet. He could reach out and touch her slender ankle—but he never did.
...Because he knew in his heart that he was afraid.He was scared to death.He was afraid that as soon as he reached out and touched that slender and cold ankle, he would prove her death and the cruel fact that she would never come back——
[Everything will be fine, Severus.I promise. 】
Suddenly, her voice emerged from his dazed, grief-stricken mind.That was what she had said the last time they talked in the Room of Requirement before the final battle broke out.
How...how is it possible...? !
Such a big talk, so taken for granted...But in the end, what...how can she guarantee that "everything will be fine"? !
In the end, she still lied to him—the note she left him was the latest lie!That wasn't the last time she lied to him at all, it was now!
She disappeared from this world.It's never going to get better.
is everything.
Everything.
Snape heard himself let out a distorted, monster-like growl.He was very surprised that his choked throat could still make such a sound; but in the next second, his body moved on its own, and even he couldn't help being surprised by what he did——
He didn't try to stand up again and put on a better posture, but he moved forward a few steps like crawling, and finally stretched out his hand towards her——he grabbed her The wrist at the waist.
A cold breath was transmitted from their touching skin almost immediately.Nothing proved to him more directly than that—that what lay there now was at last an empty shell again; that funny, cunning, brave, laughing soul had never The body disappeared.Even if he turned to Merlin for help, it might be impossible to find him again.
He heard his own voice that was hoarse almost as if it was about to break, and it sounded low in this dilapidated, empty room.
"No... Lily..."
He wanted to say that he never expected today's scene to really happen, never really expected her soul to withdraw from this world; After 20 years, he never expected that when everything was over, she would die as a farewell.
He originally thought that there was a way for his good friend to regain this body, but what about her—she could also appear in front of him with her true face, so that everyone could know her real name, her real life experience and story , praising all the virtues represented behind that real name, not just after "Lily Evans" and the illusory image and established impression represented by this name.
He opened his mouth, wanting to say "I never wanted you like this", "I hope it's me who died", and even more want to say "If this is the only way to get back that body, then you just keep going like this When Lily is all right."But in the end, he couldn't say anything.
There seemed to be a mist of pain in front of his eyes, and the functioning of his brain almost stopped; his reaction was slow, and his reason collapsed; although the last bit of rationality was still telling himself tenaciously, maybe he should go back to Hogg immediately Watts went, went to Dumbledore, and saw if Dumbledore could do anything else, but such a clear thought—the last hope of solving the problem— seemed to take a long time to come from him. The place in the brain where the thought arises extends to the entire brain.
Go back to Hogwarts—take her, this empty, cold body—maybe there is a way—if you give up here, there is really no hope—
Reason forcibly supported his will, so that he would not collapse like he did after witnessing the tragic scene in this room 16 years ago; however, his consciousness seemed to have been stripped from his body, floating in the space between him and her. Looking down at them lying on the floor among the ruins from the high air of their bodies.
Hogwarts - the word once again emerged from his bewildered mind.The term, however, no longer offered him any hope.Now when he thinks of the magnificent, ancient, and majestic magic castle represented by this term, he finds that the sense of belonging, protection, and peace of mind that the castle could give him in the past have all disappeared. All that remains in my mind are the gray-black buildings and walls, the gloomy and oppressive atmosphere, the long corridors that seem endless, those noisy and confusing magic portraits...
Then he suddenly understood something.
The sense of belonging, shelter, and peace of mind that the castle once provided him was, in the final analysis, only because of what the people who lived in the castle brought to him.At that time, Dumbledore, who was also a teacher and a father to him, was still alive; for him, he could suddenly dispel the depressing darkness in the huge castle and the sense of decay brought by the ancient buildings, and follow the corridors of the castle. The man who sang Christmas carols with the armor on his back, and brought life, vitality, and a touch of color to the gloomy castle, is also alive.
Now, however, they have all disappeared.From that great old castle, from this suddenly strange and inhospitable world, disappeared.
Hogwarts was the first and best home he had ever known.Whether it was him, or Harry Potter, or even Tom Riddle, those abandoned boys found a home there.
But now, in that family, no one is there anymore.Only then did he understand that only a place where dear and important people live can truly be called a home.Without the existence of those people, no matter how splendid, magnificent, famous, or magnificent a building is, it is just an ordinary, insignificant big house.
Snape reached into his pocket with the other hand that was not holding Lily, groped around, and took out a two-way mirror.
It was given to him by Sirius Black when he left Hogwarts to find Lily here.The stupid dog said that this thing allows the two people who hold it to communicate anytime and anywhere, and it may be useful for his trip to Godric's Hollow.
This was the first time he had accepted something from the stupid dog—and now he really needed it to contact the stupid dog and Dumbledore who was still waiting for news at Hogwarts.
See if there are any other methods that can be used—he stared at the double-sided mirror, and although he was suspicious of the strange props that Sirius Black brought out, he still told the mirror all about the stupid dog. name.
Because she once said—
You can doubt that the stars are fire, that the sun moves, that truth is a lie...
At that time, he had doubts in his heart, and he had something to do that needed to be done, so he didn't really listen to her; then, let's start now.
The author has something to say:
February 6:
Ah, I've exhausted my blood and blue bars【.
Regarding the real Lily question, whether it is her motives or her future development, you don't need to fill in those parts that are quite Ky, because they are not true.
What the professor wants to say in this chapter, "I hope I am the one who dies", is what he said in the original work when he talked with Deng Xiaoping after Lily died.Then Deng Xiaoping let him live to protect Harry.
The paragraph "Hogwarts is the home of those abandoned boys", in the original work, was Harry's idea after seeing the Pensieve before he planned to go to the Forbidden Forest to die.
Next update: It is still tentatively scheduled for tomorrow at midnight.The current party can't afford to hurt [to finger