Sold as the Alpha King's Breeder

Chapter 1382 - 137 : Bending Light

*Zara*

I held my breath as I watched Noah’s face. He hid his emotions well at that moment, digesting my words. His facade was a perfect mask, his mouth tight and expressive blue eyes giving nothing away. His dark orbs scanned my face as if trying to decide if I was truly serious or not.

I couldn’t believe those words had come out of my mouth. I knew they were true and how it seemed like things needed to be, but my delivery had been off. I wondered if I should have been more gentle with my words, but it seemed like getting straight to the point was the best way. I couldn’t be selfish by beating around the bush. Noah deserved my honesty.

That felt even more true since I had to hide the strange darkness that was currently stirring inside of me.

Noah was quiet for a long time, just searching my face. He didn’t seem angry, just contemplative. Finally, his expression cracked. I saw the determination behind his mask.

“Is that truly what you want?” he asked finally, still trying to read me.

I nodded firmly. I had given it a lot of thought over the past couple of days since we arrived in Celestial Valley. I was important to these people. They depended on me. I knew there was no other choice. “These are my mother’s people,” I said with conviction. “My mother’s memories and gifts were left with me. I have a duty to share them.”

“You have given these people hope,” Noah said warmly, his eyes filled with pride as he smiled at me. He then nodded firmly. “If you and Briella belong here, I will stay too.”

I felt my jaw drop at his declaration. “Do you really want to stay here?”

Noah nodded. I could tell by the way his eyes darkened slightly that he was dead serious. “Wherever you belong is where I’ll always be,” he said. Once again, I wanted to feel touched, but I was just shocked. “Not only that, but we’ve also been away from Drogomor for so long that we may be considered fugitives.”

I didn’t have a response to that.

His lips suddenly tightened as his jaw clenched. “There’s also the matter that if we were to return to our own realm as fugitives, it could put both you and Briella in danger again.” He nearly growled the next words. “I won’t risk your safety again.”

“Thank you,” I said, still surprised that he was willing to stay just like that but also understanding his need to protect me and Briella. I was also taken aback by the relief that permeated through me at the fact that he was staying. Our bond might have been hindered, but I still didn’t want Briella to be without a father.

Noah and I were lying in bed later that night. He wrapped an arm around me, tucking me against his side before flipping over to face me. He moved slightly so that he could lightly press his lips to mine.

I debated playing along and allowing him to make love to me, but it felt wrong to do so when neither my body nor heart was reacting to his kisses and gentle caresses. I was just about to pull away when he beat me to it, sitting up in bed.

I could see his confused expression, thanks to the soft moonlight streaming into the room through a slit in the curtains. “Are you feeling alright, Zara?” he asked gently, his eyebrows furrowing. “You don’t seem like yourself.”

I hesitated briefly. I wondered if I should tell him the truth. A part of me said that I should, but a much more urgent side was rationalizing that he wouldn’t be able to do anything about it if he did know. He would likely freak out and just cause a stir among the members of Celestial Valley.

I couldn’t tell him.

“Becoming a priestess is a lot to take in,” I responded, hating how flat my voice sounded. “I suppose I’m still just getting used to the idea. I’m sorry.”

It wasn’t a lie by any means. I truly was sorry for rejecting his attempts at connecting physically. It pained me to do so, but the thought of having those relations while I felt this way seemed like a disservice to Noah.

Noah accepted my answer, but I could see the confusion and hurt in his dark eyes as he bid me good night. I felt riddled with guilt for the whole interaction but knew there wasn’t much I could do about it.

All I could do was roll over, go to sleep, and hope that tomorrow would be better.

Tomorrow wasn’t better, nor was the next day.

I forced a smile onto my face as I led the early morning ceremony. It was a sunrise ceremony meant to honor the light that poured through the veins of Celestial Valley members. It was a beautiful affair that occurred every fortnight or so. It was fairly brief but a magical time with singing and flowers strewn about.

Noah was at my side as the ceremony ended. He was watching me with such pride and love in his gaze that it caused my chest to twist up. This should have been a joyous time. I should have felt grateful to be able to pass on these traditions. Instead, I felt lost and isolated in my newly acquired role.

“You were truly made for this,” Noah said warmly as he took my hand, leading us away from the outdoor venue.

I sucked in a breath at Noah’s genuine words. I knew he meant them, but it made me feel as if a knife was being twisted in my ribcage.

“Zara?” Noah asked with concern. He stopped walking and tugged me, so I had to face him fully. “Are you alright?”

“Fine,” I managed as I had the last dozen or so times he asked the question over the past few weeks.

I had done multiple ceremonies and led several traditions, working diligently to pass on the sacred knowledge left to me by my benevolent mother. Her memories, which had originally felt magical and warm, now felt like a curse of some kind. I saw the smiling people of the valley in these visions. Although I was in their home, they felt far away.

This became even more frighteningly apparent during a special dinner, a most beloved tradition held once a year. The people of the valley told stories and shared their spiritual experiences with one another.

“This celestial orb holds many memories of our people,” Mathias explained as he held up what appeared to be a large pearl encased in a cage of golden vines. It shimmered beneath the glittering chandelier that hung above our heads. “Each time we tell a story, the orb holds on to it, allowing us to recall those memories just by touching it.”

The room murmured appreciatively.

“Let us pass this sacred relic around the table and share with it our memories so it may hold them for future generations.”

I was well aware of the Celestial Orb. It contained a high level of magic. Sadly, it stopped working after my mother passed away. There were rumors that it started to glow again when I returned to the valley.

Apparently, those rumors were true. The orb was swirling with a soft golden hue. I immediately felt an attraction toward the sacred object.

The members were urged to think of a happy time. Many of them thought of the early morning worship ceremony. I stifled a tiny gasp when I saw images of that morning start to appear in the center of the orb.

I started to panic when the orb started to get closer to me as it was passed down from person to person. A rush of darkness suddenly crashed into me, negative thoughts filling my mind. I felt like an imposter around my mother’s people. This was such a beloved ritual to these people. I just couldn’t seem to tap into the feeling of spiritual wisdom flowing in my bloodline.

The orb was just a couple of members away from me now. I gasped softly as Malphas’ frightening face filled my mind, his sinister smile and black, soulless eyes as vivid in my mind as when I had last seen him in the flesh.

I was scarred from the harrowing battle with the dark demon sorcerer. I had unknowingly tapped into tainted dark magic to bring him down. I wondered if I had doomed myself by defeating that monster using the mystical forces of another. My actions seemed to have anchored that darkness deep inside of me.

The woman next to me sighed with contentment as she finished adding her memory to the orb. She held it out to me. I felt my body freeze as I stared into the smooth, swirling surface of the relic.

I didn’t think. I knew that I had to get away. I couldn’t touch such a precious orb with these tainted hands.

I stood abruptly, mumbling something about feeling unwell before fleeing from the room. I heard Noah apologize and excuse himself. He was then running after me.

I didn’t stop and wait for him. I knew if I did, I would likely break down. The feeling twisting in my chest wasn’t just fear. It was guilt and devastation. I sprinted all the way to the guest house that was very quickly being renovated to become our own.

I burst through the door, startling the young woman we had left to care for Briella while we attended the dinner. She stared at me with wide eyes.

“Hello,” I managed. “We have returned early. You may leave now.”

Noah chose that moment to rush in, giving me a shocked look.

The sitter looked between us before bowing and slipping out the door. “Briella is already asleep in her crib,” she said before leaving us alone.

“Zara, what was that all about?” he demanded, shutting the front door before approaching me cautiously as if I were a wild animal. I certainly felt out of control like one.

“I suddenly wasn’t feeling well,” I said, which wasn’t a lie.

Noah’s eyebrows just furrowed in concern. He seemed a little more relaxed when I didn’t pull away from him as he grasped my shoulders in his strong hands. He gently caressed the side of my face, peering deeply into my eyes. “I think you’re overworking yourself,” he said finally. “Maybe you should take a few days off from your duties and rest.”

I considered arguing. There were already so many other events that I had committed to, important rituals that required someone to lead. When I thought about facing my celestial family again after my little display, my throat started to close up. I swallowed hard before nodding. “That might be best.”

Noah frowned with concern before bending slightly to kiss my forehead and stepping away from me so that we could get ready for bed.

I glanced up at my reflection in the bathroom mirror, gazing into my green eyes. They were so much like Amara’s that it hurt to look at them now. I gasped when for a brief second. My eyes flashed an icy blue color as if reflecting my changing soul.

I wondered if defeating Malphas meant that part of his soul had infected me.

I shook the horrifying thought away, pushing myself away from the bathroom counter and making my way to Briella’s room.

I was unsurprised to find my daughter wide awake. Her head was turned so she could gaze out the window at the moon. She cooed when she saw me, lifting her hands, clearly wanting to be held. I couldn’t deny her anything, so I swept her up in my arms.

I frowned with concern when Briella moved her body in my arms so she could face the streams of moonlight. She caught one in her hand and began to play with it, her hand glowing before the light bent to her will, swirling around her tiny palm.

Briella was already showing early signs of her own emerging mystical talents. It only amplified my concerns over my baby one day facing the same struggles that I now endured alone.