She Wants to Divorce Me

Chapter 37

It wasn't an illusion; it was reality! It was the bloody truth she had to face after making a wrong choice. All words caught in her throat, unsure how to express them. Ji Yaoguang looked up, seeing her reflection in Chang Yu's eyes. No longer cold as before, they were as gentle as warm spring water. In her eyes, was Ji Yaoguang the entire world? Or at least, did she represent everything at this moment? Ji Yaoguang felt dazed. She reached out and gently covered Chang Yu's eyes, feeling the eyelashes brush against her palm like small brushes.

"Do you really think I'm the kind of person who would easily transfer affections to someone else?" With darkness before her eyes, Chang Yu gently held Ji Yaoguang's wrist, not stopping her action. A sigh escaped her lips. From body to soul, how had she wronged the person in front of her? Love was because of her, hate was because of her; all the emotions of this life seemed to be tied to this one person. Back then, it was those inexplicable suspicions and arguments that gradually eroded her heart. Would everything repeat itself now? Fatigue and heartache gathered at the tip of her heart; she was somewhat afraid they still couldn't overcome that hurdle.

"No," Ji Yaoguang denied quickly. "I just feel that my past self was terrible. But now, I won't randomly suspect you or pick fights because of a dream. You said before that it's best to talk things out if there's an issue."

"Yes," Chang Yu smiled gently. In darkness, other senses become particularly sensitive. Ji Yaoguang's closeness made her heart tingle, as if brushed by a feather. "What are you thinking now? What do you want to tell me? Are you going to start sulking because of that stranger?"

Putting herself in Chang Yu's shoes, Ji Yaoguang could understand her mood. Some pains were destined to be swallowed alone. Leaning forward, almost pressing against Chang Yu, Ji Yaoguang moved her hand away and met Chang Yu's calm gaze. She pouted and said, "I don't like her. She and the proprietress across the street must have a story. I think she must be behind the lack of business across the street. In short, she's not a good person. You're not allowed to go near her." Ji Yaoguang's tone was like that of someone throwing a tantrum, but the last few words carried a hint of assertiveness and indulgence.

"I don't like her either, and I won't go near her," Chang Yu's heart melted. She smiled and added, "But no matter what, she's Yu Sheng's friend. Let's not make arbitrary guesses about her story with the proprietress across the street, and don't jump to conclusions about what kind of person she is. Your impression is colored by subjective emotions and is always one-sided."

"I know, I know," Ji Yaoguang dragged out the last syllable.

Chang Yu nodded and said, "I think there's something very necessary to do now."

Ji Yaoguang froze and asked, "What?"

Chang Yu calmly replied, "Go home for a visit." With less than half a month until Spring Festival and current affairs temporarily concluded, it was better to set everything aside and walk the path that had been almost forgotten. Perhaps they should also visit Z University. Hopefully, past memories could dispel the unease deep in Ji Yaoguang's heart.

Youth truly had few worries. Her studies and work had proceeded smoothly according to plan, if she hadn't met Ji Yaoguang. Immersed in art, she also had a yearning for literature. The Literature and Art departments at Z University stood side by side, and news of genius-level individuals naturally reached her ears effortlessly. Before their actual encounter, she had already heard Ji Yaoguang's name. All professors in the Literature department praised this person endlessly, and her frequent visits to the Music Academy added a touch of legend. But who could have predicted the future trajectory?

Z University was located in S City, and they were both locals, so there were no concerns about mountains and waters separating them upon graduation. Compared to the commercially booming H City, S City had accumulated thousands of years of profound cultural heritage, with an ancient atmosphere permeating every corner. Safely emerging from the crowded airport, the bustling people focused only on their hurried steps, rarely casting glances at unrelated individuals around them. Reaching the square, Ji Yaoguang removed her sunglasses, spread her arms, making a gesture of embracing the city.

"Let's go," Chang Yu was more cautious, keeping an eye on the movements of people around them. She helped Ji Yaoguang put her sunglasses back on and held her hand to prevent her from going crazy in public. The taxi driver had the music radio on, with gentle songs occasionally interrupted by the earnest local accent. There's always an inexplicable fondness for beautiful people. Taking their luggage from the trunk, the two walked into the square courtyard. Withered vines climbed the walls, with tiny buds peeking out, hinting at the approach of spring amidst winter's desolation.

As expected, the elderly couple was still traveling somewhere unknown, and Ji Kaiyang remained in H City resolving some matters. In the vast courtyard, only the housekeeper was trimming unruly branches with scissors. Seeing Ji Yaoguang, he first froze, then pushed up his glasses, revealing an expression of wild joy. He wanted to give the little princess a warm embrace but abandoned the idea upon seeing his current attire. "Young Miss, you've finally returned? The Master and Madam have been thinking of you constantly."

"Don't joke, Uncle Tao," Ji Yaoguang stepped forward and hugged him, then laughed, "I know my parents' ways all too well. They'd probably prefer everyone to disappear from their sight, not disturbing their peaceful world for two. Don't have anyone busy themselves; we'll be going out again soon."

S City wasn't just Ji Yaoguang's hometown; returning home was a joyous occasion for her, but in some aspects, it was quite cruel for Chang Yu. It was only after dating Chang Yu for some time that she learned of that painful past. How much pain and loneliness had Chang Yu, who appeared so glamorous in others' eyes, endured alone? Driving to the cemetery, as the time for returning home approached for many, they could hardly find a parking space. The originally clear sky suddenly began to drizzle. As soon as they stepped into the cemetery, the smile vanished from Chang Yu's face, replaced by grief and solemnity.

Before turning eighteen, Chang Yu had always been happy, with open-minded parents and numerous honors that most people could only dream of. She was the focus of everyone's attention, a heavenly favored daughter. However, everything ended with the screeching of car tires. The huge sound and rising flames ended her happy life. Running frantically from school to the hospital near the college entrance exam, she could only embrace her grandfather, crying as the elderly sent off the young. She never lacked materially, but the spiritual loneliness constantly tormented her. The ordeal didn't end there. At twenty, she bid farewell to her last relative, left with only distant relatives with whom she barely had any connection. After dealing with all matters amidst false sentiments, she faced those gossiping people with a cold facade. They said things like actors were just performers, how a scholarly family produced such a shameless person, how it was all heavenly retribution— Suddenly breaking free from the memories, Chang Yu couldn't distinguish between the drizzle and tears on her face. Turning to look at the person whose eyes were full of concern, she forced a pale smile.

"Dad, Mom, and Grandpa, I will take good care of Chang Yu," Ji Yaoguang offered a bouquet of fresh flowers, pressing her palms together, her tone extremely devout and sincere. She hadn't visited the cemetery many times, and after starting work, she rarely even came to S City. However, each time she came, she made a solemn promise. In a daze, she remembered that she had accompanied Chang Yu to bid farewell to her grandfather; they were already together then. Chang Yu, who rarely showed emotions, silently cried in her arms that night. "I only have you left," Chang Yu had said. Chang Yu had completely entrusted her body and soul to her, but how had she treated her? How long had she treasured her like a precious gem? Ji Yaoguang's heart stirred, and she suddenly reached out to hold Chang Yu tightly in her arms. At this moment, all sweet words were no match for a warm embrace.

"I'm sorry," this apology was for Chang Yu, and also for the elders. She had truly been a jerk back then, resolutely signing the divorce papers and ultimately blaming her own pain on Chang Yu.

Chang Yu's hands rested on Ji Yaoguang's waist, her grip becoming stronger, as if wanting to fuse her entirely into her flesh and blood. Her face was pale, eyes misty with tears, but the smile that blossomed was fragile and heart-touching. After leaving the cemetery, she took Ji Yaoguang to her own home. With a creaking sound, they pushed open the door to be greeted by the smell of dust. She couldn't remember how long it had been since she last returned to this place. Even when she came back to S City for filming, she basically stayed at the Ji family's old residence. Gently wiping the dust off the photo frame, her fingers traced over the faces that were gradually becoming blurry in her mind. Chang Yu put down the frame and said softly, "Let's go back."

"You're not taking it with you?" Ji Yaoguang pointed at the photo frame. She had only seen Chang Yu's parents' faces in old photographs.

Chang Yu took a deep breath and shook her head, "No need, they're in my heart." She said returning to S City was to smooth out the unease in Ji Yaoguang's heart, but in the end, she was still immersed in her own emotions. S City held joy but also pain; each time it was dug out, it was raw and bleeding. She wasn't an unfeeling person; she wasn't as cold and indifferent as she appeared on the surface. She knew the root of her unhappiness, but this was something she inevitably had to face when returning to S City.

Ji Yaoguang stood still for a while, then suddenly knelt on one knee, took Chang Yu's hand, and gently placed a kiss on the back of it. It was a repetition of her proposal gesture, but her state of mind was far different from before. Her beautiful eyes reflected Chang Yu's face as she said softly, "You are my world, the most precious treasure of my life."