novelraw Chapter 49: This Is How You Deal with a Dependent Personality
Chapter 49: This Is How You Deal with a Dependent Personality
"Qian, with the status of having a mother, if you don’t back me and my brother up, I’ll have to let my dad sell the nightclub and be a hostess, and my brother will have to tattoo a dragon and collect protection fees, who knows, maybe one day, we’ll get hacked to death."
Qian’s words left Jia Xiufang pale, her lips trembling with fear.
"No, he can’t, he’s your real dad, your real dad..."
"Those who dabble in gambling, drugs, and vice, do they still have humanity? Mom, do you remember the kid from that family on the back street? He got into some stuff and sold his own 4-year-old son, what makes my dad any different from him?"
This is called concept switching, saying something right then leading someone into another notion, this is called brainwashing!
"That heartless man, how much suffering have I endured with him, it doesn’t matter if he treats me poorly, but how can he treat you and your brother like this, it’s a sin!" Jia Xiufang cried out.
Qian saw her start to cry, but wasn’t in a hurry, letting Jia Xiufang cry slowly, knowing this was her time to vent emotions, saying anything now would be useless, just wait for a few minutes.
Sure enough, when Jia Xiufang finished sobbing and wiping her tears in confusion, she muttered to herself, "What should we do, what should we do in the future..."
Qian had almost finished discrediting the deadbeat dad, so she began the second phase of suggestion for Jia Xiufang.
"Mom, my dad is already like this, sooner or later he’ll ruin this family, my brother and I are still so young, what do you think we should do?"
"That’s right, what are you going to do..." Jia Xiufang trembled while holding her daughter.
"Do you remember, one night we went shopping at the night market, and on our way back, we saw those women in ultra-short skirts outside the Night Shanghai club, with heavy makeup, some being hugged by men right away, can you remember that, mom?" Bringing up the scenery as a suggestive hint.
Sure enough, Jia Xiufang remembered, "I remember, I even spat at them, with hands and legs, what else can’t they do."
"Mom, if my dad owes a lot of money outside, can’t pay back, and they take me to the club, I’ll have to wear a short skirt and be hugged—"
"Ah!" Jia Xiufang shouted, being a conservative and decent woman, at the thought of her daughter raised to that state, her spirit crumbled.
This is exactly what Qian wanted, break down, the more broken down, the better the result later.
"Even if the trouble isn’t caused by my dad outside, but he ran off with the money, isn’t that a fact? When he gets back, you’ll see if he has any money left? A few years’ savings gone within days, will the next step be selling the daughter? After selling the daughter, sell the son, look at Di with that wild look, becoming a little delinquent—"
"Absolutely not!" Jia Xiufang ignited with a fiery determination. "As long as I’m here, you two siblings can’t live like that!"
This was the sentence she was aiming for! Qian had led her this far, and finally succeeded!
She placed her hand on Jia Xiufang’s shoulder, using stronger language to hint to her mother.
"Mom, my dad is done for, but you are still here! You have two kids, my brother and I need you! Can you watch us, my brother and me, being screwed over by my dad?"
"Not unless I’m dead!"
Jia Xiufang was now completely brainwashed by Qian.
"We need you!"
This sentence is very important, needing you.
Jia Xiufang has a dependent personality tendency, clinically manifesting as having no opinion, blindly following others’ words, but the very contradictory point is that people with dependent personality also desperately lack the feeling of being needed by others.
For the sake of pursuing this feeling of "being needed," she would even lower herself, humiliatingly pleasing others.
Just like her mom, eating leftovers, doing hard and dirty work, sacrificing herself for the family.
Overly dependent on her useless husband, while constantly lowering her position in the family, carefully pleasing her husband, just seeking that feeling of "being needed."
Qian constantly weakened the position of the deadbeat dad in her mother’s heart, while implying to Jia Xiufang that apart from marriage, she could find the sense of being needed from elsewhere, such as the "needs" of her children, which would help Jia Xiufang gradually become independent.
Especially, Qian is an exceptionally brilliant child, the daughter who is capable of getting into a top university, her strong need, gave Jia Xiufang new vigor.
"As long as I’m here, no one can drag my daughter to that place and make her an improper woman!"
A woman, apart from her love for her husband, her greatest attachment is to her children, to protect her own children, she can give everything, now Qian is trying to shift all the love her mother has for her father onto her and her wastrel brother.
Clearly, it’s very successful.
"But mom, just shouting isn’t enough, if my dad keeps on gambling and messing around with loose women, all the money you slave to earn won’t be enough, if he sells me, what should I do?"
"I..." Jia Xiufang was stumped by the question.
She only knew to protect her two kids, but hadn’t thought of how to protect them yet.
"Mom, divorce him, after divorce, fight for custody of my brother and me, I’ll help you get the house, with the house, you can support the two of us, no problem, even if the deadbeat dad owes money outside, you won’t have to repay it."
This is the ultimate goal, divorce!
"But, divorce, I, I..."
"What are you afraid of? Think about it, if you divorce him, he won’t be able to ask you for money, you can open a dry cleaning shop, support my brother and me, no problem, we won’t have to be sold off."
... Jia Xiufang was genuinely interested now.
The hints Qian previously gave already had a great effect, plus today, everything she said was specifically designed for her personality traits, every tone, content, and expression, all struck Jia Xiufang’s heart.
Words are an art, the language of a psychologist is the key to unlocking a patient’s inner world, how to find the crucial problem according to character, no one understands these better than Qian.
Jia Xiufang’s weakness lies in her dependent personality and deeply ingrained traditional beliefs, Qian now is using that kind of unconditional love a woman has for her children in traditional beliefs, to attack Jia Xiufang’s remaining little dependence on her husband, and let her deeply feel the sense of "being needed" through the process of protecting her own children.
Satisfying her dependent personality.
To achieve the goal, Qian didn’t hesitate to weaken her own strength, presenting herself as a powerless girl needing her mother’s protection, clearly, the effect was very good, Jia Xiufang was now already entertaining thoughts of divorce.
Qian continued to pour oil on the fire.
"Mom, if you don’t get a divorce, I will definitely be sold, you see, just for the betrothal gift, he could even make me marry into an infectious disease, for money, what won’t he do! Next time he owes money, he’ll definitely sell me! If you were a few years younger, he’d sell you too!"