novelraw Chapter 300 - 248 - What it Means to be Weak
Chapter 300 - 248 - What it Means to be Weak
Colette stared at herself in the mirror in the MA Office bathroom. The woman who stared back looked like crap; dark bags under her eyes, her hair half white. She never considered the possibility that she was weak.
Not until today.
Scherzando were easy enough, but if they had to fight monsters like Desmond…
What was she even doing? She wasn't cut out for this kind of life. Colette just liked rhythm. She liked looking at it, sensing it, feeling it coursing through her. She was a thinker, not a fighter. Yet here she was, one of her two Resonators in a Viva Unit, after getting utterly destroyed by an earth spell of all things.
That woman… whatever her name was, apologized profusely.
After the first two fights, I thought you could handle it!
Even if she didn't normally understand people all that well, those words stung.
Weak.
That one ossia spell took so much rhythm. She watched the rest of her fellow guild members toss those around like they were nothing. Even Vince, a boy who had only been a young adult for less than a year was a rhythmic monster compared to her.
Colette never compared herself to others, she never saw the point. Watching Vince and Shouri, and then fighting the same Maestro as they did; it was all but impossible not to see the difference.
KNOCK KNOCK
"Huh?!" Colette's eyes snapped to the locked door.
"Are you okay?" Nina's reassuring voice greeted her.
"No, I'm just thinking."
"Mind if I come in?"
Colette released the lock and allowed her phoenix entry to the bathroom.
Upon seeing the state her Maestro remained in, the bird wilted, her brows perked up with worry. "Oh Colette." She shook her head. The phoenix stepped forward and hugged her Maestro. "Hold me, let me take on some of your burden," the Ethereal spoke quietly.
The Maestro obeyed, wrapping her arms around the smaller Resonator.
"How's Kaira?" Colette inquired.
"Asleep. They said one more run of that machine will have her fixed up," Nina replied.
"That's good."
Silence.
"What's wrong?" Nina dared to ask.
Colette refused the worried look of her phoenix, her head dipped in thought and shame. "Nina, am I a weak Maestro?"
The question caught the Ethereal off-guard, and she hesitated, if only for a second. "Colette, strong or weak doesn't matter to me--your safety is what matters."
It took Colette a lot longer to find the words than she cared to admit. "I see." Even then, the words weren't satisfactory in her mind. They felt hollow, feeble.
A dark cloud hung over her Maestro, that much Nina could sense. Colette did have some kind of condition, supposedly. Not one the wizened phoenix could claim familiarity with. Perhaps it was best to follow Shine's advice after all. A second Resonator would take some of the fawning she enjoyed, but ultimately, she did care for her Maestro more than petty emotions could dictate. "Let's go see her," spoke Nina.
Colette nodded slowly.
The walk from the bathroom to the back rooms felt longer than Colette remembered. Maybe it was how tired she was? That had to be it.
Her legs felt like jelly, though she only noticed how difficult walking had become as she passed by her fellow guild members. She wondered why that was, but at the same time, her fatigue dulled her curiosity. Today shouldn't have been this exhausting, yet here she was.
Nina gripped Colette's hand, squeezing it tightly with concern. The Maestro couldn't pay the gesture back, she just didn't have the energy. After the long trek to get there, however, Colette found relief in the room. Kaira dried herself off, rejuvenated after her stint in the Viva Unit. A pang of jealousy struck the Maestro as she wished she could take a bath and a jolt of rhythm therapy.
"Colette…" the jackal averted her gaze. "I'm sorry."
"For what?" asked the Maestro.
"I shouldn't have taken the hit. We could have avoided coming here entirely if I had."
Colette blinked, her bleary gaze unable to focus on the words being spoken at her.
Finally, the Blaze Lyre had enough. "I think I get what that guy was talking about," spoke the phoenix. "You have some kind of inadequacy in your rhythm. I guess the people of this era worry about that kind of thing?"
The scholar nodded. "Discordia is a recent discovery in the field of rhythmolgy. It's a simple condition that is easily treatable. Its late discovery is possibly rooted in the less strict reliance on Resonators in the modern era," Colette explained, her words coming out slower than usual. She struggled to stand straight, slightly swaying as she stood there.
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"Right, well, my point is you should probably listen to what he has to say--etude with her properly," Nina urged, motioning to Kaira.
Who had already stepped forward. The jackal grabbed the nearly catatonic Colette gently by the shoulders and ushered her to a chair. "She should sit down first."
The Maestro did as her Resonators suggested, not all there. Sitting in that plastic chair felt wonderful, the peak of coziness, really. It was comfortable enough that her empty, half-lidded gaze slowly grew dark as her head drooped. Before she submitted herself to dreamland, a certain feeling tickled her scale. It was one which she had experienced countless times before. Perhaps it was her exhaustion taking the wheel, but Colette found herself grabbing hold of this foreign sensation, greedily taking it in.
It felt… good. So very good. She gripped tighter, pulling it all into herself. It was like she had never drank water in her life and tried it for the first time. It was refreshing, rejuvenating, relieving.
What was more, when she opened her eyes new feelings flooded her mind. It was like a proverbial switch was flipped in her brain.
Kaira felt awful about their loss today, but was happy to be holding her hand. Nina was intrigued, but wanted something more. Without realizing what she was doing, Colette reached out and placed a hand on the phoenix's head, gently tousling her soft red hair with a warm smile.
The two Resonators started at their Maestro like she was a Scherzando.
Colette raised a brow. "Why do you think I'm being weird?" she wondered.
That comment only intensified the befuddlement radiating from the two Resonators.
"By the sages, he really was onto something," Nina commented.
"She was never the most uh, attentive. It's a shocking difference," Kaira added.
"What?!" Colette pouted, her brows pinching tight as she pursed her lips.
"You're etuding right, your emotion stave is properly being held up," Kaira replied.
"I-I am?" Colette felt the truth behind her Resonator's words. Admittedly, she felt great. She felt connected to just her two Resonators more so than she ever had in her life.
"Keep that feeling," Nina advised.
"Pull as hard as you want on me," Kaira pleaded.
Kaira's words stuck out so much more. The jackal was begging for this, she wanted this. Colette took a breath and did as she was told, taking in as much of her precious Resonator's rhythm as was made available to her.
"Come on," the two Resonators motioned for the door.
The poor scholar wavered as she stepped into the hallway to face her fellow guild members.
Shouri was irritated they were still here.
Pacifica kept herself busy mentally calming her Maestro.
Vince was worried about Colette, but satisfied with his own performance.
Mila felt slighted that she didn't get to fight today, but in the same respect pride welled from her.
Zephyr shared in her fellow Resonator's pride at a job well done.
And Miro… was the only one of the six who noticed Colette appraising them.
"Oh! Signora Colette!" exclaimed the Natural.
"Huh?" the group looked between the fox boy and then the scholar. The sudden wonder nearly bowled the girl over like a harsh gale. She stumbled back, steadied by Kaira both physically and emotionally.
"Nngh, not all at once," groaned the Maestro, as she gripped her head.
"What's going on?" asked Vince.
"Oh!" Mila exclaimed. "She's doing it."
It took a minute for Vince to process what his Resonator was getting at, but when it clicked, he too openly wore his surprise. "Oh!"
"How does it feel?" Shouri asked.
Colette shook her head, though she leaned on Kaira, sensing that was what the Resonator wanted. "A lot," admitted the scholar. "It's loud here," came the next admission.
"Strong emotion tends to be that way if you're not used to it," Pacifica chimed in. "Or so I'm told."
Kaira nodded in agreement.
"Cool, well let's get the hell out of here," Shouri rose from where they were seated and directed the group out.
As the rest of PTRS shuffled out of the building, Colette and her duo lagged behind. "I like this," admitted the Maestro.
"Me too, a lot." Kaira's smile was brighter than Colette had ever seen in their time together.
"Do you really not mind?"
"Of course not."
Kaira leaned into her Maestro, resting her head on the shoulder closest to her. "Please rely on me, that's why I'm here," whispered the jackal.
Colette swallowed hard. "I-if you insist!" Despite how clear everyone suddenly was to her, she couldn't get a read on herself. They were just walking down the hall. Why was her heart beating so fast? And why was she so warm?
"We'll get stronger then, right?" asked Colette.
"Of course, as long as that's what you want," Kaira spoke with a dreamy air, her tail swishing behind her.
Nina shot a glance at the pair and smirked. "Oh I see," tittered the phoenix knowingly. Neither of the other girls in her party caught wind of the Ethereal's thoughts, too wrapped up in each other to notice.