Perversions of the Flesh

Chapter 179: The Wolf’s Flock

Ann swallowed, forcing her lunch back into her stomach. She was jittery, nervous, something she was becoming increasingly familiar with. Only thing was, last time she did this resulted in a tragedy. Rationally, she knew that wasn’t really her fault, but it’d still provided the opportunity. She pushed that fear away. It wouldn’t help being scared of all public speaking. Not just because one instance got her girlfriend hurt, her dad put into a coma. Totally not letting the trauma set in.

Rowena took her arm, wrapping it warmly against her side. “Hush. This will be nothing like last time, Holiness. No big speeches. No crowds. Just you and the people as they come. I will be with you every step of the way.”

“Thanks,” Ann mumbled. “Dunno if I’ll ever be ready, but we can at least try.”

“Just try not to soil your robes with your nervousness. It would be a shame to see such beauty tarnished.”

“Aw, so considerate,” Ann snarked back.

She and Rowena entered the chapel Ann was set to appear in. The ceiling was high and vaulted, with an array of beautiful gemstone mosaics lining the walls. One of the many statues of Orenous stood at the end of the rectangular room closest to Ann, behind an altar and pulpit of rather humble materials and design. Rows of wooden pews were set in an orderly fashion approaching the altar. Worshippers sat quietly, absorbed in their own devotions. It was quiet. Peaceful.

“Go on,” Rowena encouraged, keeping her voice low. “Just mingle. I will be watching nearby. Be yourself. It is your most endearing trait.”

“Right, myself. Got it,” Ann sighed. She walked into the room, leaving the altar, and approached a middle-aged woman who seemed to be watching her. She was human, in her fifties, from what Ann could tell, and looked like she was no stranger to hard work. Sun- wrinkled skin with deep crow’s feet framed brown eyes as she regarded Ann. “Good afternoon.”

“Holiness,” the woman bowed. “I’ve been looking forward to meeting you since that tragic day. I’ve prayed for the king and princess daily and hope they make a speedy recovery.”

“I appreciate it,” Ann said, taking a seat next to the woman. “Kat, er, the princess is doing well. Just lost an eye, and she’s taking it really well. The king, well, I’m praying with you.”

“That is good to hear,” the woman said, cracking a smile. “Most of us know Princess Katlyn’s reputation. Made of stern stuff, that one. Just like her mother.”

“Too true. So, what brings you here? Can’t just be to give me your condolences.”

“Well, that is a good part of it, but I also just wanted to get a better look at you. A little hard to do when you’re out in a crowd.”

“Feel a bit like a freak show,” Ann chuckled.

“Heavens no! I mean no disrespect, but someone so different from the normal Vulhardrin is a sight to see. Not to mention that hair and fur! Purple! I know people in the cities have fun with their dyes, but this is a new one. Is that symbol on your hips dyed?”

“No, no. Honestly, I was surprised I could do that when I tried,” Ann laughed. “I’d only changed things about the overall length and colour before.”

“Ah, what a wonderful skill to have,” the woman sighed. “All mine are about farming. Useful for sure, but I wouldn’t mind a couple fun ones here and there.”

“Sorry if it was rude, but I never got your name.”

“Meredith, Holiness. Work a farm out in Thalten. Came to Korvas visiting some family during the holiday. Shame that got messed up, but we take what life throws at us. Good and bad. Bounty and famine.”

“Well, it’s good to meet you, Meredith. Don’t tell people, but I kinda hate the honorifics. Name’s Annita.”

The old lady got a twinkle in her eye and gave Ann a conspiratorial nod. “Hear you loud and clear, Annita. But back to earlier topics, no, I’m not just here to bug-eye you. Been praying to Orenous for a bit now. Got this nephew, you see. Poor fool’s hopeless with the men, and he’s getting older. My prayer is nothing special. Just that he finds someone for him soon. It’d be a crying shame for him to grow up all alone.”

“How old is he?” Ann asked, giving the woman her undivided attention.

“Twenty eight. Twenty nine next month. I know, I know, he’s got plenty of life ahead of him. I’ve heard it a thousand times,” Meredith waved a wizened hand at Ann’s presumed advice. “Doesn’t make my worrying any better. I just want him to find happiness like I did.”

“Well, you’re right in that he’s got plenty of time,” Ann nodded. “How’s he been acting about the whole situation?”

“Like I’m being a worrywart. Says he’s fine to find his own relationships and that I don’t need to worry. Kids. Never understand that telling an old lady not to worry is the best way to get her to worry. You look younger than him, doubt you’d understand.”

“You’d be surprised,” Ann grinned to herself. “Still, my mom was the same way. Talking about the cute boys, and girls when I figured that part out. When are you gonna give me some grandpups? That girl is cute. Go ask her on a hunt! I just wasn’t really ready for it yet. Yeah, there are some things I regret skipping or not experiencing, but it was my choice. I just felt like a kid, you know? I didn’t feel like I was mature enough for a relationship. Maybe he’s going through something similar?”

“Maybe. I don’t know. That’s why I’m praying for guidance. To figure out what might be best for him.”

“Even if it’s to leave him alone? Let him do his own thing?”

Meredith sighed, leaning back so that her face was raised to the ceiling. “It’s not the answer I want to hear, being honest.”

“Sometimes the truth sucks. Both of you are pretty valid for wanting things either way. I’d just say have a talk with him. Listen. Don’t try to talk over him, just listen to what he tells you. Only he knows what’s in his noggin’ and heart. Well, him and Orenous. She’s always listening, believe me.”

“Yeah? Sounds like a story.”

“Not one for polite company, let me tell you. Maybe some other time, but I’ll be keeping that one to myself for now.”

“Ah, you’re no fun for gossip,” Meredith cackled. “Alright, thanks for the advice, girl. Guess I just needed to hear it from someone else.”

“Have a blessed day,” Ann said, waving as Meredith groaned, standing up. She sat there for a minute, reflecting on the conversation. It really did feel like just giving life advice. Therapist? She didn’t really study for this. Definitely out of her depth, but if things were like Meredith, she’d be ok. She put her hands on her knees and stood to find the next person.

The room was filling up little by little with people as the populace either finished up with their days or took a break. Most prayed, while others just sat in quiet contemplation as they took in the ambience. A couple brought books or seemed to be just spending their time somewhere quiet. Considering the public parks, and the giant Eas Temple out front, Ann wondered why they chose here. After a couple quick questions, she found that they just liked the atmosphere. Quiet talking and people being around helped them relax. The clergy didn’t seem to mind, so she just left those patrons to themselves.

Next, she approached a man deep in prayer. His hands were clasped firmly, but shook slightly. He looked… normal? Middle-aged, but not on the older side like Meredith. That being said, he was a Bultrong with a bushy beard, and they were a long lived race. It was hard to guess age by a simple look. Still, he looked deep in prayer at the moment, so Ann just took a seat next to him and waited. He cracked an eye open, but returned to his prayer immediately.

Ann just sat there, waiting for him to finish up. She wasn’t in any hurry. Her afternoon was booked for this and this alone. Idly, she wondered what Kat was up to. Besides the tent and glasses, they’d sent a request to a leatherworker to get an eyepatch made for the newly cyclopsed princess. Kat had called in a couple healers to pump her full of healing while they prised a few more scales off her neck. Apparently, she wanted the thing to have her own personal touch. The process of harvesting the scales sucked, but she was more than willing to put up with the pain for the reward. After Wendyl’s tests, the Alfhindur’s mind had been on ever increasing ways to use her new natural defences. She’d tossed around the idea of using them on her shield, but Bren had shot that down. They were currently far too small, and would require too much time to pull, regrow, and repeat until the entire surface of a shield was covered. Kat, of course, had pouted at this, but agreed to wait and see if she got any patches of larger scales to use for the project. Even without external armour, she was happy that her neck now had natural protection rivalling steel. Maybe better.

“So, ye just gonna sit there like a bump on a log, lassie?” the man asked.

Ann started as her daydream shattered. “Sorry, got lost in thought. I’m Annita, by the way.”

“Know who ye are. Be damned if the entire kingdom doesn’t wit’ the show ye put on,” the man grumbled. “Not tae mention the mess after.”

“Yeah,” Ann sighed. “Guess I’m important person numero uno.”

“Numera what?”

“Number one. Sorry, different language.”

“Never heard o’ that one. It from further south or east?”

“South, from what I was told. One of the pack ventured out and returned with a lot of information. Some of it stuck in my head.”

“Interestin’,” the Bultrong said, sitting up.

“Hey, do you mind if I ask you a question? We can trade if you’d like?”

“Dinnae see why not? Ask yer question.”

“Your accent. I was told by Kat, the princess, that it was related to some ancient Bultrong language. How many people know that anymore?”

The man sat back as he thought. He took his time, then nodded as he came to his answer. “Not many. Some o’ our sages still keep the language alive. Them an’ the Queen. Not sure how many o’ her whelps she’s taught, but she’s fluent from what I’ve heard. Good lot o’ our people, includin’ me, have the accent but don’t know the actual words. It’s a shame, but it helps everyone tae understand each other.”

“Interesting. I’ll have to check out other languages. All I know is the one we’re speaking, so if I have to travel south, that might be a problem.”

“Plannin’ on traipsin’ yer purple tail off outta the kingdom after that big speech?”

“Not on purpose. Depends on where Orenous guides me. Speaking of, what brings you to Her temple?”

“Ah, thought I’d gotten ye off me fer that. Well, it’s been a tough time. Me mind’s been leavin’ me these past few years. Thought’s not as quick as it used tae be. Gaps in me memory. Been causin’ no shortage o’ trouble fer the missus.” The man sighed, his face suddenly looking far older. “It’s somethin’ that’s afflicted me line fer as long as we remember. Skips a generation or two, but always comes back. Terrifies me, ye know? Losin’ who I am. So I pray fer healin’. Fer me family tae be spared what me Ma had tae go through wit’ me Da.”

“Degenerative brain disease,” Ann nodded grimly. “I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t need yer pity, lass. Just livin’ on hope that me prayers be answered. If ye could put in a good word fer me, I’d much appreciate it.”

“Your wife knows, I’m guessing?”

“Aye. Twas one o’ the first conversations we had back in our early days. Back when we were talkin’ about gettin’ serious. Settin’ up a home. She knew what might happen tae me, an’ still decided I was worth it.”

“Sounds like a wonderful woman,” Ann said, placing a hand gently on his shoulder. “You’re lucky to have her.”

“Sure am. Most beautiful woman in the village. This was afore we moved tae Korvas, mind. Stout, strong of arm, and quick of wit. Could talk circles around me even then. Dinnae what she saw in me, but we hit it off, an’ it’s been history.”

“Good for you. How long?”

“Hundred and thirteen years comin’ up,” the man said with a wide grin. “Hopefully many more wit’ me mind intact. Dinnae if ye contemplate it much, lass, but I hope she doesn’t have tae deal wit’ me bein’… not me fer long. Don’t want tae put ‘er through that.”

“Well, I don’t know how long I’ll live, but it’s nowhere near as long as Kat, so I’ll have to confront that eventually,” Ann sighed. “Maybe not the losing myself, though that’s a possibility. Who knows what time will do? Still, leaving her alone after however many years scares me.”

“Guess I get tae understand the life differences between us an’ ye younger peoples.”

“Perspective changes everything,” Ann nodded. “Want me to pray with you for a minute?”

“If ye would?” the man asked.

Ann offered her hand, which he took, and bowed his head. Ann did her best. She’d never been a religious person, but she might as well try here. She’d become a religious figure whether she liked it or not. Quietly, she spoke a few gentle words for the man, asking for his ailment to be slowed, if not cured. If there were no healers to fix it, then maybe Orenous could bestow a blessing. After she said her piece, a sad feeling washed over her. She knew it well. The kind of feeling where you desperately want to help someone, but can’t for whatever reason. Ann got the distinct impression that Orenous wanted to help everyone, just had limits to both Her power and what She was allowed to influence. In that moment, Ann felt extremely grateful that Orenous, of all the Gods, was the one to claim her soul. Someone compassionate enough to care about the people.

“She hears,” Ann said quietly. “She knows of your plight. Your struggles. I… I don’t think she can really do anything to stop it. I’m sorry.”

The man’s shoulders stiffened for a moment, then relaxed. “If Orenous could, I imagine she’d’ve done so a long time ago. Mortals must struggle. It’s the way o’ things. Gives us meanin’.”

“Maybe the Gods struggle too. Not with this kind of thing, but watching their children struggle and having to allow that. Don’t know how I’d be able to handle that.”

“Is it bad o’ me tae hope they do?”

“Don’t think so,” Ann shook her head. “We all want someone to commiserate with. Share the burden. Someone who understands. If we’re praying to that person, I’d hope She’d get why we’re going through bad times. That She’d give a shit even if She can’t help. Can give you my word that’s what I’m getting from Her right now.”

He gave Ann a half smile. “Well, it’s good tae know I’m heard. That’s more’n I thought I’d hear, aside from priestly platitudes. Thank ye kindly, Annita. Ye’re a good sort. Appreciate the honesty. Think I’m gonna head back tae the wife an’ spend some time. Only have so much left.”

“Yeah. Savour it. Make the most of every minute you two have. Not to mention the kiddos.”

“For sure,” the man chuckled. “Have a blessed day, Chosen.”

“You too,” Ann nodded back.

Slowly, she stood and moved on to the next person who caught her eye. She didn’t have any rhyme or reason for who she chose, but it seemed like Orenous guided her where she was needed. Not everyone was as heavy as the Bultrong man, but plenty just wanted their struggles heard. Plenty of love and laughs, but also struggles with the same. The easiest were the ones asking for blessings. She gave them freely to those who gave her good reason. The best were an adorable couple asking to get a blessing for their upcoming engagement. Ann had been all too happy to tell them to go, be free, and happy with each other.

Eventually, she felt her energy failing her, and she sought out Rowena. The Mother Superior was speaking with a visitor, so she just hung back against the wall until she finished.

“Done with your rounds for today, Holiness?” Rowena asked as she stood, lips curling around her tusks in a sweet smile.

“Yeah. Sorry, can only take hearing people’s worries so much before I’m exhausted. It’s been pretty great, actually, but I’m tired.”

“That’s why we have shifts that rotate,” Rowena smile, taking Ann’s hand. “Come. Let us feed you and then send you off for the night. We all greatly appreciate your presence.”

“I want to do this again,” Ann decided. “Not sure when I’ll get the chance to, but I wouldn’t mind doing this regularly.”

“Our halls are always open to one such as you, Holiness. Now, enough of the heavy talk. I hear Sara is on kitchen duty tonight, and she makes the most wonderful roasts. Best be early to get them fresh.”

An hour later, Ann left the Temple with a full belly and more stories from the priests she’d spoken with at dinner. She felt the good kind of tired. Where you’d done a lot and just wanted to flop in bed. She hoped Kat and Rosalyn would be there. She could use some company.