My Fated Mate Can Have Her

Chapter 272: Watching Him Sleep

Violet

The room was dark, lit only by the faint glow of moonlight filtering through the curtains.

I lay curled against Rowan’s side, my hand resting on his chest, feeling the steady rise and fall of his breathing. His arm was wrapped around my waist, holding me close even in sleep.

His lips were slightly parted, and every so often, a quiet breath escaped him that was almost a snore.

I found myself smiling.

It felt strange, having spent most of the day in bed. We had only left to bathe and eat. I remember Telsid bringing in food twice, knocking briefly and leaving the trays outside without a word. It had been a bit funny.

My body still hummed with the memory of the day and my cheeks faintly heated from remembering it.

The soreness between my thighs, the tender spots on my neck and collarbone where his mouth had been, and the pleasant ache in my muscles from being bent and held and taken in ways I hadn’t known I wanted.

I shifted closer to him, pressing my cheek against his shoulder.

This felt nice.

Too nice.

The thought crept in before I could stop it.

What if I was falling in love with him?

My chest tightened.

I closed my eyes, trying to push the thought away, but it wouldn’t leave. It sat there, heavy and undeniable, demanding to be acknowledged.

I liked Rowan. I liked him so much it frightened me.

I liked the way he laughed, the way he looked at me, how caring he was, how persistent, and how considerate he has been, along with so many other things. I loved the small moments with him, his gentleness, and how he never demanded for me to... choose him.

And I was choosing him, wasn’t I?

Every day I stayed here, every night I spent in his arms, I was choosing him.

But what about Kael?

I felt so terrible I hadn’t even sent word to him yet. He was probably still in Fresna not knowing that I had—

Guilt churned in my stomach.

I was going to meet with Bei in the morning and ask her to help me send word to Kael. He should at least know I was safe and... what else? To tell him I was sleeping with another man? That I had spent the day in Rowan’s bed, crying out his name, and letting him fill me over and over again?

The thought made me feel terrible.

But I couldn’t keep him in the dark forever. He deserved to know. Even if it hurt him. Even if it hurt me.

Rowan wouldn’t like it. I knew that. He would be uncomfortable, maybe even upset, if I reached out to Kael.

But I owed Kael at least that much, and a part of me missed him if I was being honest.

Despite his upbringing, he still also cared about me.

I stared at the ceiling, my thoughts spiralling.

I liked them both.

The realization settled heavily over me.

Why did I have to have two mates?

Kael had done a lot for me... even if... I closed my eyes, taking in a heavy breath. The bond between us had been immediate, overwhelming, a force that had swept me off my feet before I even knew what was happening.

And I liked Rowan’s warmth. It was with a startling clarity I was realising just how at ease I felt here. Unlike Kael’s intensity, it felt like Rowan had just snuck up on me until I was tangled in it before even realising it.

’He risked his life for you...’

Two mates.

The longer I stayed here, the deeper I fell for Rowan, the more it would hurt Kael. The more it would hurt me when I finally had to face him.

Could I keep doing this?

My mind raced, grasping for solutions.

Maybe I should leave.

The thought surfaced suddenly.

I could leave Silverwood. Slip away before things got any more complicated. Follow the pull that had been tugging at me since I first felt it, and find where it was coming from.

Nothing in the lycan records I had been reading pointed to a specific pull like Bei had said. All I had read were customs and traditions which were beautiful but weren’t giving me the immediate answers I needed.

Still, it has been very pleasant learning about the remnants of my people.

I could sort that out first. Find the answers I was looking for. And then... then I could deal with the impossible choice I was going to have to make.

But how could I leave without Rowan coming after me?

The thought of leaving him made my chest ache.

I didn’t want

to leave him.

I buried my face against his side, breathing in his scent, feeling the steady thrum of his heartbeat beneath my palm.

’Stop it,’ I told myself. ’Just enjoy this. Just... be here. In this moment. With him.’

I slowly relaxed. Tomorrow I would talk to Bei and would figure out what to do.

But tonight...

Tonight, I would let myself have this.

I closed my eyes and pressed closer to him, his arm tightening around me in his sleep.

And somewhere deep in my chest, in a place I didn’t want to examine too closely, I silently hoped Kael would come.

’Why am I like this?’

[ - ]

The following morning greeted me with a shocking request from Rowan. His mother wanted to see me. I had initially panicked, thinking he might introduced me as his mate, but he had asked me if I had met and interacted with his mother when he wasn’t around because she had remembered and asked for me.

I had frozen, my mind flashing back to the darkness of the room, the tears streaming down my face, and those gentle arms wrapping around me without question.

I hadn’t told him about that.

Now, the three of us were seated at round table, my hands folded in my lap while I tried not to look as nervous as I felt.

She remembered me crying. She had held me while I sobbed like a child.

Rowan looked slightly nervous too, and I was wondering why when I realised his scent would heavily be on me.

’Oh, no...’

"You must be Violet."