novelraw Chapter 36 I have crossed mountains and seas
Chapter 36 I have crossed mountains and seas
The stage lights illuminated only that one person's space.
Chen Bo's fingers plucked the first chord on the guitar strings, clean and simple, like the first breeze that rushed in when you opened the window in the morning.
He didn't look at anyone in the audience; his gaze was fixed on a point in the void, as if there was a phonograph that only he could see, slowly projecting some faded images.
The sound of the piano fell like raindrops, one by one, in the silent studio.
He spoke, his voice, transmitted through the top-of-the-line speakers, clear as if washed by spring water, yet carrying a husky quality reminiscent of someone who has traveled a long and arduous journey:
"Wandering, on the road."
Upon hearing the first sentence, Xu Yueqing, sitting in the front row of the audience, stirred slightly.
She was wearing a mask, only her eyes were visible, and at that moment, something slowly cracked in those usually cold and aloof eyes.
This sentence is too ordinary, as ordinary as an everyday sigh.
But to Xu Yueqing, it was like an extremely fine needle piercing a corner of her memory that she had deliberately ignored.
She recalled the inexplicable flutter and vanity she felt a month ago when she received a vague poem "written for you" from Lu Ze while she was filming in another city.
That evening, Chen Bo made a video call as usual. The background was their home, and he was wearing an apron. He asked her if she had eaten and said that he had made her favorite soup and was waiting for her to come back.
What did she say?
It sounded like a perfunctory "Okay, I know, I'm busy," and then she hung up.
Before hanging up, she seemed to see a fleeting look of disappointment in Chen Bo's eyes on the screen, but she didn't pay attention to it at the time, and even thought he was a bit annoying.
It's always these trivial daily routines—making soup, asking if someone is feeling cold or warm—there's no sophisticated fun in them at all.
Now, the phrase "wandering, on the road" is like a rusty key, suddenly unlocking the guilt she had deliberately locked away.
Chen Bo continued singing on stage, his voice steady, yet every word carrying immense weight.
Are you leaving? (via via)
The guitar sound intensified slightly, like a heartbeat suddenly skipping a beat.
Xu Yueqing's breathing became rapid.
Via via… This simple onomatopoeia sounded exactly like the text message notification sounds she had sent to Chen Bo that month.
Indifferent, brief, and distant.
"Fragile, yet proud."
When Chen Bo sang this line, he slightly raised his eyes, his gaze seemingly sweeping over the audience, yet also seemingly not.
His expression was calm, without resentment or accusation, just a quiet statement.
But Xu Yueqing felt a burning sensation on her face.
He was proud—he used to be like that too, but for her sake, he retreated to obscurity and lived a life of seclusion.
She was his weakness, his vulnerability.
"That was once what I looked like too."
Chen Bo's voice carried a hint of self-deprecating laughter as he said this.
"boom--"
Something exploded in Xu Yueqing's mind.
That was once what I looked like too.
Yes, he does have dreams and ambitions.
She shattered his dreams, and then accused him of being unambitious and incompetent.
On stage, the music entered an interlude, and the guitar melody became slightly more intense, as if it were a release after suppression, but it quickly returned to calm, like a tired breath after a storm.
Chen Bo's fingers glided across the strings, his eyes remaining calm, but beneath that calm lay a turbulent storm that only he could comprehend.
The audience was completely silent, not in a polite way, but in a silence that seemed to hold their breath, a silence of intense concentration.
Even the "professional audience members" who had been somewhat distracted earlier forgot to clap according to the procedure and just stared blankly at the stage.
In the direction of the seven singers' dressing room, Wang Han, who was watching the scene through the monitor screen, had been leaning back on the sofa with his legs crossed, but now he unconsciously sat up straight.
Bai Linlin stopped touching up her makeup, staring at the screen with her lips slightly parted.
Zhang Zhenhan dropped his cool expression and tapped his fingers lightly on his knee in rhythm.
In the director's control room, Zhang Guanhai held his thermos of goji berries, his mouth agape, wide enough to fit an egg, his eyes bulging like copper bells.
The tension was much stronger than during the rehearsal.
The music director next to him, Lao Liu, was already rubbing his hands together excitedly, muttering to himself, "The energy of the performance, the power of the lyrics..."
The chorus is coming.
Chen Bo's voice suddenly rose a little higher, not a high note to show off his skills, but a natural release after his emotions were fully saturated, carrying a kind of reckless, almost tragic power.
I have crossed mountains and seas.
We also passed through crowds of people.
Everything I once had
In the blink of an eye, it all vanished like smoke.
"boom--"
This time, it was Xu Yueqing's psychological defenses that collapsed.
Mountains and sea, crowds of people...
Over the past three years, Chen Bo has accompanied her across countless mountains and seas, helping her rush from one job to another, and flying from one city to another.
What was "everything" that he once had, which also harbored a dream of music? Was it his dream?
Or is she the only person in his entire world?
And she made all of that "vanish like smoke in the blink of an eye."
It was simply because she felt he was "unworthy" of her, because she wanted a "broader spiritual world," and because of her damned "white moonlight" sentiment, which even she herself might not truly understand!
I was once lost, disappointed, and directionless.
Until I realized that ordinariness is the only answer.
"Waaah..."
A sob, though suppressed, still escaped from beneath Xu Yueqing's mask.
Tears flowed like a burst dam, instantly washing away all her pride and pretense. Her shoulders trembled violently, and she covered her face with her hands, but tears still poured out from between her fingers, quickly soaking her mask and palms.
Li Man was startled and hurriedly reached out to hug her, feeling the person in her arms trembling like a leaf in the autumn wind.
Li Man's own eyes also reddened. She wasn't the person involved, but the immense loss and struggle in the lyrics, and the almost sighing line at the end, "Ordinary is the only answer," cut into her heart like a knife.
She finally understood what kind of silent catastrophe Chen Bo had experienced over the past three years, especially in the last month or so.
Across from her, Bei Weiwei was already in tears.
She wasn't feeling guilty, but rather heartbroken.
She had been watching Chen Bo for longer and earlier than anyone else, watching how carefully he held Xu Yueqing in his hands, watching how his world gradually shrank until it consisted only of that one person.
At this moment, every line of "loss and disappointment" in the lyrics felt like a needle piercing her heart.
She bit her lip hard, trying not to cry out, but the tears just wouldn't stop.
Zhou Lingyan was also stunned. The live performance was so powerful that for the first time, a blank look of shock appeared on her usually flamboyant and beautiful face.