My Alleged Husband

Chapter 505 - 484 - Letting Go_1

"Child, Grandpa finally understands why so many issues have arisen, but now Grandpa can tell you clearly, don’t worry, I will be there for you when you need me most. When you don’t need me, I won’t interfere in your affairs by appearing before you. What I’m doing today is simply to let you know that I’m also at my wit’s end. I just want you to understand that I wish to be happily with you. Maybe to you, this seems like an indifferent attitude, but to Grandpa, it is but a wistful desire. Do you know? Grandpa won’t have too many happy moments left in this life, but Grandpa hopes that in my remaining years, my grandson can live a joyful life with me. Isn’t that enough for me? Perhaps in everyone’s eyes, in everyone’s world, this isn’t an attitude, but it is so in my heart. Maybe you’ll find me annoying, maybe you’ll think I’m ignorant. Why do I still come to you and insist on these things? But Grandpa is human too. Grandpa has children and loved ones. I too want to enjoy the joy of family life. I hope you can truly understand Grandpa and not hold these things against me anymore!"

Zhang Yichen felt very uncomfortable listening to his grandfather say such words. It wasn’t that he didn’t care about his grandfather’s feelings, but he really couldn’t manage everything. If he became like his grandfather, he would lose credibility in front of his own son, which was an incredibly difficult choice to make. Sometimes he really wanted to ask Heaven if there was any other option left for him, why he was treated this way. Did it really make them happy to treat him so? Questions upon questions lay heavy on his heart, unsure what to do, unsure who to ask. He could only struggle and suffer silently, showing everyone only his glorious side. But who could know the hardships his heart once endured? Many people think that it’s enough just to have your own children, have your own family—whether you are happy or not doesn’t matter. But can it really be like that for him? What he desired was a family that could live together happily, what he longed for was a home without family strife, for the greatest benefit of a family is harmony that leads to prosperity in all things. If the family isn’t harmonious, how could everything else go well? Why does no one understand his point of view, why can’t anyone put themselves in his shoes to consider these issues? Is everyone so selfish? Do they all want him to become like that? How he wished no one would force him anymore. Things that could’ve been happy, joyful, now corner him step by step down a dead-end path. Isn’t this like demanding his life? How he wished there were more people in the world who could truly understand him, understand him from the heart, not out of some ulterior motive. What he wanted was sincere understanding, but why is it so hard to find?

"Grandpa, I know what kind of life you desire, but often you should also be understanding of me. If I were to comply with you on everything, what about my family? Do you know? There are many things I want that are different from what you want. Maybe you think it’s not that important whether my parents come back or not. In my heart, even though I say that I don’t hope my parents will come back because I’m scared they’ll hurt me again, do I really not wish for them to return? I’m also a child, and I need the love of my parents. How could I not want them to come back? Faced with countless questions and choices, I don’t know how to choose. Some choices could numb me, but I still hope that my choices are ones I can bear. I know you hope to enjoy the joy of a family, but your idea of family joy isn’t just about being happy; your ambition can grow with time. When ambition swells to a certain degree, it’s no longer a small thing. Grandpa, what you’re thinking in your heart, you know better than I do because those are your own thoughts. You are the master of your inner desires; surely you must know what you truly think, right? But should so many things really be this way? They shouldn’t. Shouldn’t we live happily and joyfully? What I want is not much; if my family could live happily and contentedly, that would be enough. If sometimes I overlook your thoughts, your feelings, I hope you can understand me, forgive me. Truth is, I’m also very tired at times. Every day I must choose between my family and my career, because once I relax, the family will quarrel, and in the company, there are those lurking, ready to betray me, to unseat me. Aren’t I walking on thin ice every day? Every day, I’m worried about betrayal. Although no one dares, the fear of it is there. Sometimes isn’t the betrayal of a loved one even more painful? Looking back, no one knows why I argue with my wife, but deep down, I know she’s starting to hatch plans to betray me. Her betrayal tears me apart—she’s my wife, how could she betray me? With her betrayal, can her heart truly be happy?"

"Alright, now I understand all the thoughts in your heart. Rest assured, from today on I won’t meddle in your affairs anymore. You can do what makes you happy, and I hope you won’t be betrayed by your loved ones, for I know that feeling is heart-wrenching!"