My Alleged Husband

Chapter 492 - 471 Sensible Child_1

Zhang Ni knew that his great-grandfather and his parents were all very sad, but he didn’t know what to do. He only wished his family could be happy and accompany him, watching him grow up joyfully. For him, a child, that was already enough. He was a child; he didn’t play mind games like adults, nor did he have so many extravagant desires and pursuits. All he wanted was for his family’s love for him to never change. But it seemed that for their family, this was very, very difficult. Each person had different pursuits, all thinking about how to leave this place and never considering how the ones who needed them would feel, how much it hurt inside.

When he stood outside the door and heard Old Master Zhang speaking, he knew how heartbroken his great-grandfather was, but he didn’t know how to comfort him. Maybe it was all as his parents had once said, inevitable. Often, even though he wanted to do something, he just couldn’t muster the strength, which is why many things ultimately ended in disappointment for everyone. He only wished his family could live happily around him, but this was really so tough; he had never obtained such an outcome. They were always so selfish, but he couldn’t be like his parents, couldn’t be like his grandparents. His parents had too many helpless situations, and his grandparents’ hearts were truly ruthless. So why should he become one of them? Wouldn’t that make the relatives who cared about him even sadder? There were so many things he wanted to do but was powerless to accomplish, leaving those who loved him heartbroken and himself unable to help. The feeling of wanting to console those hurt, yet not knowing the right words, was terribly painful. But what could he do? Could he just give up on this? Impossible. If he just gave up on them so easily, what right would he have to be his grandfather’s grandson, to carry on as a descendant of the Zhang family? Every generation had lived honorably. If because of his own cowardice the Zhang family’s reputation suffered, he would be willing to descend to the eighteenth layer of hell.

"Yichen, Zhihan, do you know? When your parents cruelly abandoned our family back then, how conflicted and how much pain I felt inside. I never imagined that my own son would do such a thing. I am his biological father. After his mother died early, it was always me who carefully brought him up. But in the end, I realized no matter how I treated him, I never existed in his heart. What I wanted was not much; you may feel my expectations have turned into wishful thinking, but was I really wrong? I just wanted him to stay by my side, to let me enjoy the happiness of being indulged by my children, but none was achieved. They were always so heartless, repeatedly abandoning and hurting me. Didn’t their hearts ache? I am human too; I have a soul, I have feelings. But why, when they did these things and hurt me without considering the consequences, did they feel happy? I am their elder, but is it really right for them to treat an elder this way? Aren’t they afraid of retribution? What I want is really just a little bit, and even this small hope seems eternally unattainable..."

"Grandpa, don’t talk like that. No matter where my parents are, you still have me, my wife, and my son. The three of us are with you. I asked if my parents would come back home, but we will make sure you enjoy being doted on by your family. As long as you don’t miss them as endlessly as you used to, then you can truly be happy. But I also know it’s impossible for parents not to miss their children. You, as an elder, can’t possibly forget my dad and mom. It’s precisely because of this that your heart feels so conflicted and painful, because the people you care about most have hurt you. You can’t accept such a reality! Stop missing them like you used to because in their hearts, there’s no place for us; we should learn to forget them too. Let them go if they want to struggle and drift outside. The past is like floating clouds; once gone, it’s gone. Why should we recall them with such heavy hearts? Our hearts have long left us, so why do we allow them to hurt us time and again while we never learn to protect ourselves?"

Old Master Zhang knew his grandson spoke sensibly and he understood these facts, but he couldn’t make things turn out like he imagined. He didn’t know what to do inside; it was impossible to truly forget his biological son. It was he who had painstakingly brought him up, just as he brought up his grandson. Those feelings couldn’t just be forgotten, yet his son had treated him so wrongly. What could he do? Was he really supposed to drive him out of the Zhang family? In his heart, he couldn’t bear to do that; after all, that was his own descendant from the Zhang family. How could he simply cast him out?

"You are a sensible child, and so is your son, but none of you can understand or experience the bitterness behind that; it’s not something that can be easily put into words. That kind of sadness comes from a heartfelt pain, a pain none of you will ever truly understand. The son I worked so hard to raise has been so ungrateful. Can you understand how much that hurts inside?"

Zhang Yichen knew that pain too well. Without personally experiencing it, one could never really know what it felt like.