My Alleged Husband

Chapter 360 - 340 I Regret It_1

"How can you think like that? I’ve never felt that my face is more important than you," Yichen exclaimed, his voice tinged with panic. "You silly thing, can you please not jump to such wild conclusions? Don’t you realize that when you do this, it worries me too? I’m afraid you will leave me, so I have to keep you by my side. Is it so wrong for me to do that? It’s because my love for you courses through my bones that I want to keep you by my side for a lifetime, accompanying you, taking care of you. Is that wrong? I know you might find it hard to accept right now, but shouldn’t you consider my feelings too? Do you think I wanted this? What I really wished for is that you could be with me without any conditions, justifiably and legitimately. But you saw your parents’ attitude at that time—they would never agree to us being together. They think you’re too naive, too serious, but to be able to be with you, I made this decision. I did it so we could have a happy family in the future. Is that really so wrong?"

"No, you’re not wrong, your biggest mistake was that you shouldn’t have lied to me. You have no trust in me at all," Ran Zhihan’s voice was filled with hurt. "I am your wife. Is it so hard to say a word of trust? If you had told me in advance, none of this would have happened. I have a question for you—if a couple lives their whole lives together without choosing to have children, can they still be considered a real husband and wife?"

"Don’t be angry anymore. I admit I was wrong," Yichen pleaded. "Can’t an apology make it right? If you keep being angry, you’ll grow old..."

"Sadly, I regret it now, I regret marrying you, I regret meeting you, I regret being with you. I never coveted anything from you in our relationship. I cared not for your fame, money, or status; I was with you because I liked you as a person, genuinely liked your nature, your innocence and purity. But now I realize that your heart is not as pure as I thought. You always negotiate with ulterior motives, wanting to keep everything you desire tightly in your grasp. You never consider whether what you gain is right or wrong, forever oblivious to the pain of those who care about you. In your eyes, just like your parents, you see no one else—only yourself!"

Zhang Yichen had never expected his wife to say such things to him, and it pained him deeply. Hadn’t he put in so much effort just to be with her? Why had it led to this outcome? Was it truly so heinous for him to have told a lie for the sake of being with the woman he loved?

"What do you mean by saying you regret our marriage? Is there someone else in your heart? We’ve worked so hard to get to this point today. We’ve both endured so much suffering, so much hardship, but why, now that we’re finally together, do you have to tell me you regret our union? Do you realize how much that hurts me?"

"Haha, does your heart really ache? Did you consider my feelings when you said those words, did those things?" Ran Zhihan laughed bitterly. "Did you ever think about how painful the truth would be for me? Your heart never did care how I felt. Why make me your excuse? You make me feel that you’re so fake. I treated you as the greatest love of my life, but how did you treat me? Lies after lies. Is this how you repay your wife? Is this how you treat the person beside you in bed? Yes, in my heart, I did see you as very important, but what you’ve done is just too much for me to bear. I never thought you would say or do such things to me. But today, I see that you really did them — because you don’t care anymore, your concern is only your so-called face and dignity. On the first night of our marriage, you made such unreasonable demands of me. I stayed silent. Do you know how I found out the truth? I heard every single word you said to Grandpa in the living room, crystal clear, but I kept quiet. I didn’t want Grandpa to worry because of me. I asked him about it last night, but he knew nothing. When you made that decision, you even kept it from Grandpa, who loves you the most. What do you take us for? Do you still view me as family? Don’t keep telling me I’m the person you love most, the most important to you, because you truly disgust me. Do you understand? I desperately wanted to be with you, but what I got in return was lies and deceit. Do you know what that means? It means I’m no longer in your heart."

"That’s not what it is, that’s not what I think. I regard you as the dearest person to me. Why won’t you believe me?" Yichen was almost begging. "I’ve apologized for my mistake. Isn’t that enough? What more do you want from me? Do I have to die in front of you?"

"You needn’t threaten me. Do you trust me? If you had any trust in me, you wouldn’t have said or done these things," Ran Zhihan’s tone was cutting. "You certainly would have told me the truth. But you didn’t. You chose to lie to me, your bedfellow. That means you have something to hide in your heart. And if you have something to hide, it means you’re considering straying. If you want to cheat, why be with me at all? I believe in what Grandpa said, that people in your family fall for only one person and never change. I trusted that, yet you lied to me. Once a lie is exposed, it’s a brutal sight. I need to seriously consider whether we should continue together because I don’t know what to make of you now. I don’t know why you’re with me. I need to sort out my thoughts before I can be with you again. If I can figure it out in the next few days, that would be best. If not, let’s end it here. I can hardly accept what you said on our wedding night; don’t force me into a corner. If I end up taking drastic measures, you won’t be content either. We should at least leave each other a way out. I’ll go and get some things straight with my parents. I’ll still come back to sleep here tonight, but I don’t want to sleep in the same bed with you..."

After saying her piece, Ran Zhihan left.