My Alleged Husband

Chapter 302 - 282: Ruthless_1

Zhang Yichen heard his mother say this, and now he began to understand something. It turned out that not all things were done by his mother alone; his father had also been involved. However, his father had not chosen to take responsibility for any of the faults. Instead, he had pushed all the blame onto his mother’s shoulders, choosing to have her bear all the undesirable consequences. At this moment, Zhang Yichen realized what kind of person his father really was – a cowardly and fearful man who never wanted to take responsibility for his own mistakes, always seeking to push his wrongdoings onto his wife, the one closest to him. He had never imagined his father to be such a person. In his heart, every father should be the greatest, willing to do anything to protect his wife, his father and his children. So why was his father the exact opposite of everyone else’s? Could his father really abandon his own parents, his wife, and his son just for his own benefit? Was that really so important to him? Was his life meant to be spent with nothing but the pursuit of gains? If that was the case, then why had he chosen to come back? Was his choice to return just to hurt him, to hurt him with words, to hurt the woman he cherished the most? No, he was unwilling to accept this cruel reality, and yet it was too much for him to bear. No matter how much his father had hurt him, he had always felt that his father was the greatest. But for the image of a great father to suddenly collapse in the heart of a weak child was truly a devastating blow to that child.

"Mom, after hearing what you’ve just said, I particularly want to understand one thing: for every single thing you and my beloved woman have been through, was my father involved? And yet in the end, he didn’t choose to step forward and bear the consequences, instead putting all the blame on you. You ended up carrying all the responsibility. Can you tell me clearly if there’s any truth to this?" Zhang Yichen was hoping his mother would give him a negative answer. He didn’t want his father’s image to collapse completely in his heart, but the result left him devastated.

Xia Jing had not expected her son to be so perceptive. She had made some noncommittal remarks, but her son had picked up on the key points. How was she to wrap this up? Should she just plainly tell her son that things were as they were? If she did, would Zhang Zhentian’s image collapse in her son’s heart? She didn’t want that to happen, but she had no way to stop the progression of these events.

"Mom, please speak. Can you tell me if things are really like that? I don’t want you, even now, to lie to me because that would only make me more disgusted. If you truly still care about me, your son, then please tell me the truth!" Zhang Yichen pleaded with Xia Jing.

Xia Jing couldn’t bear to see her son heartbroken, so she ultimately chose to reveal the harsh truth.

"Child, your guess is not wrong. Things happened just like that. For every single thing I did to you and the girl you love the most, your father was involved. Many times, he even encouraged and supported me to do those things. But in the end, when trouble arose, he didn’t stand with me to face the consequences. He pushed all the blame onto me. I bore his faults time and time again, but I never had a place in his heart. I thought that my unconditional sacrifices for him would surely fill his heart with love for me, but it didn’t turn out that way. You should know that our relationship didn’t deteriorate to this state just because of a simple lie. In his heart, the words I said to him represented an unforgivable fault, yet he never considered whether his deeds towards me were wrong. In his eyes, I, his wife, am less important than his interests, less important than his impulses. So now I’ve come to a realization. No matter how he looks for me, no matter how much he begs, and even if he searches to the ends of the earth, I will never live with him again. Living with him, I feel suffocated!"

"Then can you tell me why you chose to abandon me along with my father at the beginning?"

This question was always the biggest knot in Zhang Yichen’s heart, and he really wanted to unravel it.

"There’s nothing wrong with speaking out now," she said, "so I’ll tell you. Actually, at the moment I gave birth to you, it wasn’t that I wanted to abandon you. Right after I delivered you, your father told me to leave you with your grandfather and to run away with him to chase freedom. I was extremely reluctant inside; how could anyone cruelly abandon their own flesh and blood, whom they carried painstakingly for ten months? I just couldn’t do it. So I negotiated with him to wait until you were a month old before leaving with him. But the day of the full month came so swiftly; in the end, I left you with him anyway. That’s why all these things happened. Child, do you hate me?"

Zhang Yichen was completely astonished. He had never imagined that his abandonment was not due to his mother’s heartlessness, but because of his own father. For all these years, he had hated his mother, only to realize he had hated the wrong person. He wished he could turn back time and keep his mother by his side to honor her properly.

"Mom, I don’t hate you. To be honest, I believed it was you who persuaded my dad to abandon me, and I truly hated you bitterly. But today, I finally understand everything. It wasn’t your fault. I now choose not to hate you. I will let go of my hatred and together with you, carry on living with love. You are my mom, and I will always keep you in my heart all my life. I love you, my mom!"

Xia Jing had waited for over a decade just to hear her own son say "I love you"! Her heart was truly thrilled. She had never expected that clearing up a misunderstanding could be so liberating, no longer having to constantly worry about her son discovering some secret. At this moment, Xia Jing suddenly realized that being transparent was indeed very relaxing. You don’t have to care about whether people can see through you because you are already transparent. When you present your transparent self to others, they won’t exhaust themselves trying to guess your thoughts or wonder about your next actions. Such a life was really good, but why had she understood this so late? If only she had understood it earlier, perhaps things wouldn’t have escalated to the point they had today.

"My dear son, mom, thank you. It took me over a decade to hear your ’I love you’. You must listen to grandpa well and not make him worry. Mom will come to see you when I have time, but I have things to do now, so I won’t say any more. Goodbye!"

After saying this, Xia Jing quickly hung up the phone and squatted down to cry alone.