Inner Demons

Chapter 146: The First Tear

The beggar, or rather, Qingliangzi, frowned slightly. "You demon, since you knew I was coming to kill you and couldn't escape just now, you're quite calm at this moment."

Li Yunxin, reeking of alcohol, smiled. "The question is, how do you know I couldn't escape, and wasn't waiting for you to walk into a trap?"

Qingliangzi put his hands behind his back and slowly walked forward. As he walked, he felt the restriction he had placed on the street—a restriction set by a True Realm master with the power of the Manifestation Realm peak was not so easily broken. He believed Yue Yunzi could use a magic treasure to break it within half an hour, but he didn't believe a demon could do it.

But demons were cruel and cunning, and he had slain great demons before. So he believed she was bluffing now, plotting something—the restriction he had set was still intact, though he knew some subtle streams of magical power had broken through it.

She was probably trying to summon or contact someone.

Perhaps summoning Bai Yunxin, but the flow of magical power had not left the city, but was lurking near this street.

Qingliangzi didn't know where this demon got her confidence. He decided to find her hidden move.

He walked to within ten steps of Li Yunxin and stood still. With a shake of his hands, a green glow lit up both ends of the street. Then, the two of them were sealed within this short section of the street by mist from both sides. No sound or light could pass through; he could do as he pleased.

So he said, "If you tell me a few more things, or kill yourself, I can leave you with a whole corpse."

Li Yunxin thought for a moment. "Why do you want to kill me?""Because you asked things you shouldn't have," Qingliangzi said. "But that's not important... I was going to kill you sooner or later. I've taken a liking to your demon body. I can't leave a whole corpse of a demon that's too strong, and I don't care for demons that are too weak. Someone like you—at the peak of the Manifestation Realm but with only the strength of the Illusory Realm, is most suitable—ha, you see, I was right."

"You talk a lot of nonsense, much like myself," Li Yunxin said, finishing the jar of wine. He tossed it aside, and it rolled into the shadows of the steps with a clatter. Qingliangzi glanced over; there were already seven or eight jars piled in the shadows.

So she was a demon who loved wine. Or perhaps she was drinking for courage.

Then he heard Li Yunxin say, "So when you killed Li Chunfeng and his wife, did you have the guts to talk so much nonsense?"

Qingliangzi frowned at this. "Just now, you demon were asking about Li Chunfeng and his wife, and now you're still asking as you face death. What exactly do you want to know?"

But Li Yunxin just smiled faintly, and with a wave of his hand, another jar of wine flew out from the inner hall of the Wood South Residence. He broke the mud seal and took another drink, looking at Qingliangzi with a smile. "When I asked you about the Mutual Aid Society just now, you told me everything. Although I know you wanted to kill me for a long time, you still talked too much nonsense. Let me tell you why—you're in the same situation as me."

"You're about to go crazy from holding it in."

"You have a big secret in your heart, so you desperately want to find someone to tell. But if you find a common person on the street to tell, they have no idea what you're talking about. So you find it meaningless too. But to tell someone who can truly understand... that would be a disaster, as that person might leak the secret."

"So, like me, you become a chatterbox before you decide to finish off a worthy opponent, wishing you could pour out all your secrets."

Qingliangzi's face turned ugly. "What a sharp-tongued demon, you're the one talking too much nonsense now!"

Li Yunxin nodded happily. "Yes, yes. I'm so grateful you gave me this opportunity. You have to know... you are my obsession."

"I, in my past life, couldn't feel others' emotions, and it's the same in this life, but at least I can understand them. So I can understand things like love and affection, and I can even feel... because an old man at a certain moment greatly resembled someone I cared about a lot in my past life."

"My god. And I can really feel that I'm moved." Li Yunxin held the wine jar, frowned in thought for a moment, and tilted his head. "Do you think this is a good thing or a bad thing? I personally think it's a good thing—I seem to have opened the door to a new world and experienced new emotions."

"And because of that... I just realized another thing." Li Yunxin sighed. "Before, I was born from a woman, and raised by this woman and that man for over a decade—this is an experience I never had in my past life. I called this woman 'mother,' and that man 'father'."

"Although I'm not a normal person, when others are good to me, I feel happy too. Sometimes I ask myself, after coming to this world for so many years, why do I still remember things from before? Why, when I speak, do I still like to use words from that world? For example, right now I really want to call you an idiot. Why?"

Li Yunxin threw away the wine jar, clasped his hands behind his back, and paced a few steps with his head down. "I never dared to think about this question carefully before. But after seeing you tonight, I understand."

"This is a kind of self-defense mechanism of mine."

"I experienced unimaginable darkness in my previous life and did unimaginable bad things—judging solely by the tolerance of the society and civilization at that time for those bad things... friend, when it comes to crime, I am your ancestor. Therefore, I can't trust others, and I don't want to trust others."

"Then I came to this world with clear memories. And I felt what you call fatherly and motherly love. This feeling... was very strong, very powerful. I was almost conquered by this feeling, thinking, 'Hmm, it's not bad to live a life like this.' At that time, ah, I read, fished, played chess, practiced calligraphy, my god... I was practically a sage."

"But even in those days, I stubbornly clung to the things and lifestyle of my past life in my heart."

"Because my psychological defense mechanism, my subconsciousness, didn't want me to trust anyone, didn't want me to invest emotions in anyone. So they tried to isolate me from this real world, from that man, from that woman. The most direct method was not to forget the past."

"I was actually controlled by my own defense mechanism for so long, and only tonight, seeing you again, did I understand." Li Yunxin stood still, no longer pacing. "It's because they realized, my god... I actually developed feelings for that man, that woman... And this feeling could put me in danger, so... they wouldn't let me forget the things from the past!"

Then he looked up at Qingliangzi. "I'm really happy, friend—meeting you today, knowing some truths, I finally realized... I love them, I can really love them. I can actually... feel that kind of emotion! Not for any purpose!"

Li Yunxin raised his hand and wiped the corner of his eye with a finger. Then he laughed and held out his hand to show Qingliangzi. "Look... hahaha! I shed a tear for them! I can really love someone!"

Seeing Li Yunxin's moist fingertip under the moonlight, a chill... slowly rose up Qingliangzi's spine.

He suddenly felt a strong and sharp sense of danger—because of this crazed person before him.

...He looked just like a madman!

The cultivator frowned and slowly inhaled. "You're not Bai Yunxin's maid. You're a madman! Who on earth are you?"

Li Yunxin smiled at him for a moment, then said, "You finally realize it... friend. I am indeed not some maid of Bai Yunxin. And I am indeed a madman."

"I am Li Yunxin." In the darkness, his smile suddenly vanished, his eyes burning like a wild beast's as he stared at Qingliangzi. "My father is Li Chunfeng, my mother is Shangguan Yue. Whom you claim to have honorably slain."

"So tonight, I will avenge my father and mother here."

"Honorably—and grind you into a pulp!"

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