Immortality Is No Easy Task

Chapter 10

Remove my eyes?

Right.

How could I have forgotten?

The exhilaration that his experience had brought…

Made him forget every bit of things.

The experience was truly wondrous.

Wondrous enough to forget all meaning and purpose.

The only way Qi Chen could do the experience justice was by describing it as ‘ascension’.

If ascension existed, the feeling he felt, the feeling that everything couldn't be more obvious and clear, that must have been ascension.

Drunk with that feeling coursing through his existence, he has never felt everything to be so tiny, every existence, every being, no matter how big or small, every single thing felt like ants.

Everything was inconsequential.

Be it life.

Be it death.

Be it even the ‘knowledge’ he had spent his whole life seeking.

Every single bit, everything was clear.

He understood everything at that moment.

Mortal wishes, mortal struggles, compared to that sight…

They felt worthless.

He felt that feeling, the feeling of being above everything.

The feeling where nothing could affect you in the slightest bit again.

Beautiful.

To have forgotten the very reason I even went through it…

It truly is…

Terrifyingly beautiful.

“Get ready!”

Her tone was painted in her usual playfulness, not one bit different.

Yet he was still stuck in the past.

That feeling.

That bit.

If I could feel it again…

Just once.

Once again.

To be pulled back to an endless void within a shell where he could neither move nor feel, from the previous transcendental state felt no less like a fallen god.

A fall from godhood, a fall from heaven to the ground.

For a moment he was everything and now he was absolutely nothing.

Do it!

He chanted in his head, it wasn't for anything, merely to add some courage into his soul.

It was far from easy to part with so many things in one day.

First movement and now sight.

But it will be worth it.

Forget half my lifespan.

Be it all.

Should the price be of eternal damnation, bless me.

Bless me with this sight.

Knowledge.

I will die for it.

‘Pop!’

It wasn't a feeling, it wasn't a sound.

It is a connection to his soul.

It was something he could feel, yet could not pinpoint where it was from.

Like a weird feeling in the back of your head, something you can explain, yet clearly, you felt something.

A creeping cold climbed up, into what felt like to be his eyes.

It was an unsettling coldness that crept within.

A sharp, unsettling tug could be felt, it wasn't painful, nor was it pleasure.

It was nothing, yet felt as if there was something.

Right…

My eyes.

A feeling as if an anchor who had been there for the longest time has been lifted, and unhesitatingly, violently and uncaringly wrenched away.

Set sail.

His mind felt stretched, it was hazy, not painful, but felt airy, he felt like he could lose consciousness any moment.

The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation.

“I almost forgot something!”

“You may feel something, and you must hold on!”

“After all, eyes are the windows to the soul, removing them will make your soul have some…”

“Interesting effects.”

Why couldn't she say it earlier?

By that time, his mind was just like earlier.

He could barely think, yet he could clearly feel he was not fading.

Rather his body was fighting.

Desperately fighting, wanting to escape, rattling against the chains.

It was tearing open the corridors of perception, leaving him dangling in-between.

He couldn't control himself, as if his mind was being meddled with, he was as if an idiot floating upwards and downwards, trapped by the uncaring, cruel chains.

Escape!

I must escape!

Leave this wretched body!

I must run!

It was a run or flight response.

My soul was telling me, shouting into my ears.

Run for my life.

The remaining eye!

I must escape through it, if not, I will be stuck in this body.

The fear, that primal urge.

He fiercely resisted.

Escaping the body was his first thought, else not, when the second eye is also removed he will be stuck in this corpse for eternity.

The eyes are the windows of the soul.

The eyes are the bridge between the soul and the body, on death, the soul leaves the body by the eyes.

Removing them is akin to trapping the soul in the body, never to see the light of the day again.

The trapping of the soul, is the denial of reincarnation, to prevent this fate, the soul would instinctively fight.

Fight their way out of this accursed shell that no longer served even a trace of purpose.

The body, upon death, is pure dead weight.

To fight against an instinct as primal as a baby crying was far from an easy feat.

Willpower was secondary.

Obsession was the force that drove him.

To prevent his soul from moving an inch was as if controlling a foreign body, utterly stupid.

Yet his will resisted.

Interesting effects…

Damn her.

It felt like an eternity, holding against a tsunami as a mere mortal, merely slowing down his soul by a bit, like holding it back with paper, ultimately inconsequential.

“All right, the second one!”

It was another dissociative ‘pop’ sound.

His soul stopped moving.

Rather, it uncontrollably vibrated, fixed in place, as if wailing for its doomed fate.

The feeling this time was much different from the last, rather it had changed everything.

What felt like being trapped in an inanimate object, was now the complete absence and void of existence.

He had doubts he still existed, an eternal void, and endless void.

Thinking has ceased, or rather slowed.

It took forever to even think about his existence.

It was as if he had resettled to an old stage, before birth when he was nothing but a wisp awaiting his reincarnation.

Except he felt a crushing despair, an intense feeling of sadness.

Thoughts formed as slow as a snail, thinking any complex thoughts were beyond him, it was a long torture, even seconds felt like forever.

A soul trapped in a dead body.

Unable to leave, even when the body is burned or destroyed, they are bonded to the ashes.

A cruel, cruel fate that no one would wish for except upon their biggest enemies.

It wasn't pain, not sadness, but an utter void, a hopeless despair and a thoughtless bubble.

Anything, any stimulation would be the greatest salvation.

“You really held on!”

“I thought you would fail, and have your soul escape, entering the sea of reincarnation, waiting endlessly for your turn at reincarnation.”

“Right, it must be hard for you to think now, but you should be able to register and remember my words.”

“So let's chat when I implant the first eye, Mr. Scholar.”

“By then, I am sure you have much more to say.”

The voice was…

Enchantingly beautiful.

Like the prettiest melody that has ever befalled on him.

If he had tears, perhaps they would trickle down his face.

Salvation.

Truly.

The single thought of not being alone…

Even for a small moment….

No matter how primitive his thoughts…

Joy could still be felt.

Thank you.

‘Squelch!’

‘Pop!’

A miraculous feeling has swerved into his mind, a weird object in a socket that has once felt empty.

He suddenly did not feel so lonely.

A new hope crept up his heart.

A warm, lovely hope, a rare beacon of light in the eternal raft of darkness.

His thoughts were still slow, he could barely form anything, yet that feeling, a feeling of something present in an absence…

It was something even an idiot could feel.

“I am going to connect the circuits into your body and soul right now.”

“It may be…”

“Slightly painful.”

He could barely understand her words, yet he flinched instinctively at the word ‘painful’.

A word so foreign yet so intimate, sending a wave of fear into his soul.

Burn.

An intense sense of burning seared even his soul, at that moment, he fully felt the form of his soul.

A humanoid form, and the area around his eyes burned.

Not a normal burn, it was as if his soul was sliced into a billion pieces, burned all while he was alive and kicking.

Even if he had no voice, he must scream.

The pain is too overbearing, too tyrannical, too ruthless.

Soul pain was unlike anything physical.

A physical pain, no matter how painful, was barely scratching the surface of true pain.

True pain is…

As beautiful as it is painful.

Ahhh…

It was a scream of both pain and pleasure.

A pleasure at the sheer beauty of pain.

Pain is often…

Beautiful.

The pain of a soul, and the death of a body.

These experiences are all ‘knowledge’.

Even as a mere, pathetic soul who is incapable of much thought, a scholar never forgets.

The unbearable urge and yearn for the beautiful being known as knowledge.

If there is one thing he loved, it is knowledge.

The pain of his soul, the searing sight, was akin to being reminded, circuits were being carved into his soul, at the area of his left eye.

Something was coming.

He could feel it.

An instinct more than a feeling.

His soul was feeling it.

A sight would finally enter his eyes, something he had never seen before.

Physical senses were returning.

He was once again regaining the very basic feeling of pain.

The first thing that hit him was pain.

Yet the slow, gradual regain of thoughts was far more euphoric than a mere pathetic bit of pain.

Pain is worthless.

In front of the priceless gain of sense, thoughts and most importantly ‘self’.

“Wha-”

He attempted to speak before a quick finger was brought to his mouth, while he has yet to open his eyes, the cold touch awakened his senses.

“Unless you want to die right now, do not open your left eye.”

“The other eye has yet to be implanted. The left eye has also yet to be settled.”

“By opening it right now, your soul could very well be destroyed by the lingering hatred of the Nascent Soul cultivator.”

“Now let me find the other eye.”

Her words made him doubt her process even more.

Find the other eye?

Did you just have a Nascent Soul eye lying around?

Could you not at least give me a pair?

That said his left eye indeed felt as if it had a will of its own.

It was squirming in his eye, making her words much more convincing.

Obliterate my soul…

That is quite an experience.

He lightly licked his lips, moisturising the dry walls of it.

“Where is it…”

“It is so annoying.”

“It is going to break free quite soon, and kill you if I can't find the eye in time.”

“What is it?”

“The remnant hatred of the Nascent Soul cultivator, I already forgot her name, so it shouldn't make much difference.”

“Kill me?”

“Yeah.”

“What do you mean break free?”

“By itself, the eye is much more rampant due to its fear and uncertainty.”

“It is a remnant hatred, not a will capable of thinking.”

“It can only act on instinct, it is afraid and uncertain.”

“I am merely suppressing the will, since it has fused with you, I can no longer interfere as much.”

She gave a soft sigh.

“What should I do?”

“Think of something quick.”

Her tone made him on the edge of his seat, he was afraid.

Of course he was afraid.

Fear was given.

He could die any moment and she was merely lightly annoyed.

“Wait. Let me find it.”

The eye was starting to hurt, and he could feel a small bit of him was starting to be attacked, as if bitten.

“Faster!”

“Fine, fine.”

A quick squelch could be heard.

A quick splatter of a cold liquid hit his skin, one even landing on the edge of his lips.

“This should work.”

“You better be grateful.”