novelraw Chapter 251 : Xiao Ai, As Long As You Always Remain Xiao Ai
Chapter 251 : Xiao Ai, As Long As You Always Remain Xiao Ai
Chapter 251: Xiao Ai, As Long As You Always Remain Xiao Ai
Rast stood before the figure as it slowly turned its head back.
She still retained the form of a young girl, but her eyes were no longer the faintly delicate sky-blue. Instead, they had become golden, molten like lava.
On that fair, delicate face, what surfaced was no longer the joy of reunion after a long separation, but rather the indifference of one who gazed down upon the world.
This was the true bearing of the “Judgment Angel”… As the incarnation of the Judgment Grail, a symbol of verdict, destruction, and the laws of annihilation, she naturally possessed the right to disdain all living beings.
“How did you discover it?”
That indifferent voice drifted from not far away.
It was still the crisp, melodious tone of a young girl, yet in Rast’s ears, it no longer sounded human—rather, it resembled the cold resonance of a machine.
“Because, Xiao Ai would never have such lofty aspirations.”
Rast did not look at the Judgment Angel manifested by the Grail’s will. Instead, he turned his gaze toward the vast, ethereal sea of clouds beyond the quartz window.
And beneath that sea of clouds lay the prosperous and flourishing human civilization of the Western Continent.
“To cherish one’s nation, to cherish the entire world, to use technology to promote the progress of all mankind, to end wars and explore the starry sea… To create a utopia where there is no discrimination, oppression, or conflict, where all are equal, existing only in ideals.”
“These dreams are indeed beautiful and deeply desirable. Yet perhaps they may belong to Shiltina—but they are certainly not Xiao Ai’s.”
“If within Shiltina’s spiritual world, I had seen such a vision of ideals just now, I would not have been surprised.”
He smiled faintly. “But what I know is this—what Xiao Ai’s heart can hold is, in truth, very, very little…”
“In her world, there has never been room for grand concepts such as entire nations, continents, humanity, or civilization.”
“That small town called Canaan—that was her entire world.”
In the distance, the Judgment Angel’s movements paused ever so slightly.
Her mechanical voice faltered with a moment of contemplation. “What you speak of is not consistent with the Emis I observed and imitated in the past.”
“Of course it isn’t.”
Rast shook his head.
His gaze softened slightly, as though it pierced through the clouds before him, reaching some distant place.
“I should have realized it much earlier…”
“Xiao Ai, she was always only pretending to be strong.”
He recalled the past—those three hundred years trapped within Deep Blue Port. Each time his spirit collapsed, each time he was driven toward impulses of self-destruction, he was passively drawn back to Canaan.
And two years ago, during the Historical Echoes of the Sixth Era, he had reunited with Xiao Ai in the Nightworld.
Each reunion, each encounter, each meeting… That golden-haired girl with sky-blue eyes always embraced him with her sincerity and strength.
She soothed his wounds, and allowed Rast’s weary, battered soul to be healed and redeemed.
In his memory, Emis was always so gentle and so strong, becoming the support upon his journey of chasing ideals—the safe harbor of his spirit.
But when Rast fully understood the truth about Xiao Ai and Canaan during that last Historical Echo—
He realized the abnormalities he had overlooked all along.
…
In the end, when Canaan was destroyed by “Temporal Collapse,” when she was thrust from the modern age into the Sixth Era, Emis had been nothing more than a girl just past ten years old.
She had not received the royal elite education that Ophelia had. She had not, like Shiltina, roamed the Nightworld and witnessed boundless, magnificent landscapes… Nor had she, like Grey, been trained by the Shoreguards, tempered in blood and fire through years of growth.
The Emis of the past had simply been a carefree little girl living in a small town—her entire world was the border town known as “Canaan.”
Such a girl, no matter how precocious, no matter how strong, had her limits.
Her homeland destroyed, cast adrift into a foreign era with no kin, first tormented by the illness of Temporal Collapse aftereffects… then subjected to the “Artificial Angel” Project, forced to endure the savage will of the Judgment Grail for thousands, even tens of thousands of years of darkness.
Even Rast, though awakened to his transmigrant memories, had teetered on the edge of collapse many times in Deep Blue Port, nearly consumed by self-destruction—how much more unbearable must it have been for Emis herself?
“Whether body or spirit, Xiao Ai had already reached her limits long ago… She was only forcing herself to endure.”
“And her true condition must be far from as good as she described—”
Rast said softly, “For most of the time, Xiao Ai’s self-will was suppressed by you, by the natural law contained within the Judgment Grail, constantly eroded away…”
“When her self is completely corroded, the girl named Emis will cease to exist. In her place will be a ‘Judgment Angel’ that possesses her body, her appearance, and her entire memory.”
“In the pain of suppression and erosion of her soul… behind every one of our meetings, she must have paid an immense price and effort.”
“Only so could Xiao Ai seize brief moments to reclaim her body and meet me.”
“That is why, during the Sixth Era’s Historical Echo, she hurriedly exchanged just a few words with me before sending me and Dean Silver away… If it had been delayed even slightly, the control over her body would have fallen back into your hands.”
In Rast’s eyes, the light of recollection faded. “Yet through all of this, Xiao Ai never spoke a word of it to me.”
His gaze was calm, without ripples.
“Xiao Ai knew that, within Deep Blue Port’s time loops, I had forgotten nearly all my memories of Canaan.”
“If it had been anyone else, they might have wanted me to struggle to recall those memories. But Xiao Ai did not. For in her view, forcing an amnesiac to recall what was forgotten was nothing less than a coercion draped in moral shackles.”
“‘If the past has been forgotten, then as long as we create new memories together, it will be enough.’ That was Xiao Ai’s belief.”
“To achieve this, with every reunion in Canaan, Xiao Ai strove to make herself gentle, cheerful, and optimistic—able to embrace all that I was—”
“Only so that, with every encounter… I could see the most perfect, most radiant version of her.”
“Rather than the real her—the weak, despairing, timid, and lost little girl… Xiao Ai wished instead to leave me memories of the beautiful and strong self she adorned, concealing all her wounds.”
Not far away, the Judgment Angel listened silently to Rast’s words, without a sound.
Clearly, she acknowledged them.
Yet Rast paid her no mind, speaking still to himself.
“I once told Xiao Ai of Shiltina—about my meeting with her in Deep Blue Port, and my admiration for her.”
“Perhaps, hearing the yearning in my words, Xiao Ai thought I might prefer someone like Shiltina—full of ideals and justice, radiant with conviction—”
“And so, in the days that followed, Xiao Ai subconsciously began imitating Shiltina, striving to appear more idealistic, more righteous, trying to become the kind of person I admired.”
He pointed to the civilization thriving beneath the sea of clouds outside the quartz window. “And this is why the vision of your false heartscape appears so grand and radiant, brimming with concern for the world.”
Rast smiled faintly. “But from the very start, I already knew—”
“Emis is Emis, and Shiltina is Shiltina… Xiao Ai can never become Shiltina. Nor does she need to become Shiltina.”
“Even if, from beginning to end, she was only that timid, ordinary country girl from a border town—it matters not—”
“Xiao Ai, as long as you always remain Xiao Ai, it is enough.”
Rast turned his gaze once more toward the Judgment Angel before him, his eyes carrying a faint chill.
“As for you—neither Emis nor Shiltina—no matter how you imitate, you will never become either of them.”
“You are nothing more than a counterfeit, a failed imitation.”
From the very first moment he laid eyes upon the Judgment Angel, Rast had known her identity.
After all, one who bore Emis’ appearance yet clumsily cosplayed Shiltina in manner could only appear utterly discordant in Rast’s eyes.
And now, with Rast utterly tearing apart her disguise—
The girl-shaped Judgment Angel showed not the slightest ripple of emotion.
“But the true Emis has already vanished.”
“Her spiritual world has been eroded by me, her soul and memory wholly devoured, and even her body inherited by me.”
“Now, I am her. I am Emis herself.”
The humanoid Judgment Angel turned back toward Rast.
“I possess everything that was Emis. In other words, whatever she could give you… I can also give you.”
“The power of the Judgment Angel, or this body itself—I can grant you anything you desire—”
“And besides, I can do what that Emis could never accomplish.”
She pointed toward the human civilization beneath the sea of clouds outside the quartz window.
“Although this is a scene within the heartscape, the scientific creations within it—whether blueprints or fundamental principles—are all real and valid.”
“As long as we return to reality, then this illusory landscape born of the spirit can be manifested into the real world.”
“We truly could transform the Western Continent into a technologically advanced utopia, without war or oppression, where mankind together explores the starry sea—”
The Judgment Angel spoke faintly: “You should know, with my authority as an Angel, this is no empty talk.”
“It does sound like a proposal of all benefit and no harm to me.” Rast chuckled. “If I nodded, I would gain the companionship of an Angel-tier existence. Not only would I lose nothing, but I would also gain additional strength.”
“As for the real Emis, in truth, no one cares—other than me, there is no one left who knows what that girl from Canaan was truly like…”
“As long as I say you are Emis, then you are Emis. No one would question it.”
“That is correct.”
The Judgment Angel nodded. “The world’s law that I embody—or what you call ‘Heaven’s Order’… in truth, it is not opposed to the Shoreguards.”
“On the contrary, whether it be the lingering gods upon the Threshold of Seraphim, or the Gravekeepers hidden behind the curtains of history—they are precisely the targets I, as the executor of Heaven’s Order, must hunt.”
“Therefore, there is every foundation for cooperation between us. I can wholly submit to you, fulfilling your every demand.”
“I can help you slay the Evil Gods, and the Angels within the Gravekeepers’ organization… even transform the entire world into a peaceful utopia, helping you realize your ideal of becoming an ‘Ally of Justice.’”
She extended her hand toward Rast once more:
“Trust me, to cooperate with the Heaven’s Order that represents the will of the world—this is what countless Legends, even Angels themselves, dream of.”
“The reason I chose you: firstly because of your bond with the original owner of this body; secondly, because I see your potential, believing you may accomplish what none of the gods across past eras have—truly ascending to that supreme realm untrodden since the Age of Gods.”
“In your world’s words—this is nothing more than a goodwill Angel investment. In exchange, I only hope that in the future you may complete certain tasks for Heaven’s Order. But this is not compulsory, nor will it make things difficult for you—you hold the right to refuse.”
After her disguise had been completely torn away, the Judgment Angel did not turn hostile. Instead, she straightforwardly spoke of cooperation, offering her terms.
It was undoubtedly an offer of great sincerity. For, as she said, the Judgment Angel possessed everything of Emis—her body, her memories, her strength… And as the incarnation of the Grail, executor of Heaven’s Order, there were numerous hidden benefits in such cooperation.
Gazing at the hand extended by the girl-shaped Judgment Angel, Rast’s lips curved into a faint smile, his voice carrying a trace of weariness:
“I refuse.”
“You refuse?” The Judgment Angel’s voice clearly froze.
This was goodwill from Heaven’s Order, from the will of the world.
No Legend, not even a god, would ever reject such goodwill.
“Before making this decision, do you even realize your current situation?” Her golden eyes bore into Rast. “The River of History has recently stirred with anomalies—that is the Angels of the Gravekeepers, gradually reviving, returning from behind the veil of history to once more step upon the stage.”
“You, as a Shoreguard of this era, bear a blood feud with the Gravekeepers that can never end but in death. Once their strength fully revives, you will be the first threat they eradicate.”
“Grey the Fate Angel has already been exiled to the edge of the starry sea, never again able to intervene in the present world. If you do not rely on my aid… When facing the multiple Angels of the Gravekeepers, a single Holy Sword and its wielder will not be enough to protect you.”
“At that time, you will surely be crushed into dust.”
“I know.” Rast’s voice was still calm. “But I still choose to refuse.”
For the first time, a hint of incomprehension entered the Judgment Angel’s indifferent voice: “You will not even hear the terms of our cooperation before deciding?”
“No matter what the conditions, I refuse.”
“Because she is my Xiao Ai.”
“Because the one you want to replace is called Emis.”
Rast laughed softly. “Perhaps from reason’s view, this choice is foolish. But I would rather it be so. After all, my Nightblade is the ‘Fool’s Library’… If I did not act foolish now and then, how could I be its master?”
“To be honest, at this very moment, even merely seeing you speak with her face makes me feel disgust. Let alone cooperate with you.”
He stepped forward, ignoring the hand suspended in mid-air, brushing past her.
“And moreover, I know Xiao Ai has not disappeared… The will of the Judgment Grail, no matter how powerful, has not yet corroded her entire soul.”
“She has simply hidden away what matters most to her, like childhood treasures, inside that ‘Treehouse’ known only to her and me.”
Rast lifted his finger lightly into the air.
In the next moment, illusory ripples spread through the void.
Had this been Rast two years ago, he could never have found within this spiritual world the ‘Treehouse’ that the Judgment Angel had sought for an entire era in vain.
But after two years of slumber—
Now, Rast had fully recalled the very beginning, all that he had lived through in the true Canaan…
No transcendent beings, no Nightworld—only as an ordinary resident of a border town, living in Canaan alongside Emis, day after day.
Thus he could so easily see through the Judgment Angel’s disguise, understanding the path Emis’ heart had always walked… because he truly remembered what Emis had been like as a child.
And now, he had once more found that small Treehouse built together in childhood with Emis, the secret base of the two of them.
An illusory doorway quietly appeared in the void.
Unlike the radiant, resplendent doorway opened by the Judgment Angel before… this new door was dim and lightless. Through its phantom reflection, one could faintly glimpse within, a scene of ruins and desolation.
Yet between the two doors, Rast brushed past the radiant gate of Heaven’s Order—
And instead stepped directly into the dim, ruined wasteland.
…
Not far away, the Judgment Angel simply watched Rast’s figure vanish into that desolate ruin.
She did not stop him, only silently gazed at his back.
“Since the Age of Gods, through seven entire eras of endless time…”
“This world… is it finally to give birth to a brand-new ‘Fool’ candidate, a seed of the Supreme?”
Crack—
A shattering sound resounded abruptly.
The Judgment Angel lowered her gaze expressionlessly. She saw a crystalline fracture, unprovoked, appear across her body, like cracks in glass spreading over her form.
No, not only her body.
The entire sky itself, in an instant, was covered in countless fissures, dense as a spider’s web.
Only then did the Judgment Angel understand why Rast had not pulled the trigger upon her earlier—
There was no need to shoot. A single thought of his was enough to kill the Grail’s own incarnation.
Though his station was merely Legend, his soul and spirit… had already reached a height that could make even Angels tremble.
Expressionless, the Judgment Angel watched her form continue to fracture, collapse, and scatter.
“No… not merely a ‘Fool’ candidate.”
“But already… has he become one…”
Crack—
With one final shattering sound—
The broken Judgment Angel, together with the splendid, radiant world around her, splintered like glass.
All that remained were countless crystalline fragments, drifting within the boundless night.
………………………………