I PICKED UP A CHILD IN A DUMPSTER

Chapter 168: COMPLETE YAP of -

「PHASE TWO MATERIAL!! ( •̀へ •́ )」

Everyone nearby slowly looked toward Si Hon.

Then toward the white cute haired kid floating.

Then back toward Si Hon again.

Nobody spoke.

Mostly because their brains were currently liquefying in real time.

Meanwhile Si Hon completely misunderstood the silence.

(Yeah... fair enough.)

His gaze drifted toward the gigantic dragon corpse nearby, black scales still steaming beneath the rain while smoke curled upward from between shattered concrete and melted debris.

(I mean... it IS a dragon.)

He nodded then casually thought.

(Status.)

Blue translucent light immediately flickered across the rain filled air.

Not subtle light either.

It expanded outward brightly enough that everyone instinctively looked toward it, the glowing screen forming layer by layer in front of Si Hon like reality itself had opened a menu for him.

Because it did...

And instead of Mimi’s information appearing— His own status window materialized first.

────────────────────────

Name: Si Hon

Level: 56

Tendency: Careful Strategies

Job: Unemployed

Title:

Still new but hanging in there — tap for more...

Thief — tap for more...

A Clown — tap for more...

Stat Points: 103

Strength: 29 (3.2)+

Agility: 29+

Stamina: 52+

Endurance: 48+

Luck: 41+

Intelligence: 27?+

Mana: 26+

────────────────────────

Silence followed immediately afterward.

Not normal silence either.

The kind where everyone’s thoughts collectively crashed into a wall at the same time.

Rain continued falling softly across the ruined school grounds while steam hissed endlessly from the dragon corpse nearby, each raindrop evaporating the instant it touched those black scales. Somewhere farther inside the city another explosion echoed faintly beneath the storm clouds overhead.

But around Si Hon—

Nobody moved.

Because it wasn’t the dragon shocking them anymore.

It wasn’t even the absurd stats.

Not the level.

Not the weird titles, and definitely not the fact one of them literally said.

"A Clown."

No.

It was because—

They could see it.

The system.

An actual visible status screen floating openly in front of someone.

A real one.

Aeloria’s eyes widened slightly despite herself, blue hair shifting softly in the rain while her calm expression cracked for maybe half a second.

Which honestly said a lot considering she normally reacted to disaster like someone mildly inconvenienced by weather.

Seong’s expression flattened so completely it almost became art that turned black and white.

Mihu physically stopped breathing for a second.

Han and Suha meanwhile had absolutely no idea what was happening, but refused to be left out emotionally.

So both of them slowly looked at each other.

Held hands.

Then nodded very seriously like two tiny businessmen discussing the economy.

"Crazy," Han whispered.

"Yea," Suha agreed immediately. "Very crazy."

Meanwhile Jisoo’s grip around Si Hon’s wrist tightened unconsciously.

Her eyes never left the floating screen.

Shock.

Suspicion.

Confusion.

Calculation.

All layered together behind her stare while rain slid quietly down strands of her dark hair across her face.

Because this wasn’t supposed to happen.

System windows were locked in this region... or maybe because they crossed a portal they aren’t in the... that explanation could wait.

At least—

That’s how it should’ve worked.

In the other hand, Si Hon remained completely unaware that everyone behind him was experiencing catastrophic psychological damage.

Instead he squinted thoughtfully at his own stats like a tired office worker checking grocery prices.

"Agh... can’t even call status nonchalantly anymore..." he muttered while rubbing his chin. "But woah..."

His eyes narrowed harder.

"Something definitely changed, and what’s with the question mark in my intelligence?"

Nobody answered.

Mostly because nobody knew how to even BEGIN answering that.

Si Hon tilted his head slightly.

"Why’s everyone acting weird?"

Dead silence.

Seong immediately looked away toward the rain like the sky suddenly became fascinating.

Aeloria coughed softly into her hand.

"(⁠•⁠ ⁠▽⁠ ⁠•⁠;⁠)... perhaps stress."

"Yeah," Seong added instantly. "Mass hallucinations are probably happening."

"Definitely hallucinations."

Mihu nodded WAY too fast.

"YES. HALLUCINATIONS..."

Han copied her immediately.

"YEAH!"

Suha copied him.

"SUPER hallucination."

Si Hon stared at all of them.

"You guys are weird."

Meanwhile Jisoo continued staring directly at the floating system window with an unreadable expression, her brows slowly tightening while her thoughts visibly spiraled deeper and deeper into suspicion territory.

Because now she had even more questions.

Too many questions.

And every single one of them somehow pointed back toward Si Hon.

Unfortunately for her—

Si Hon casually dismissed the entire screen before she could process half of it.

The blue window vanished instantly into scattered particles of light.

Then, while everyone still stood there mentally buffering, Si Hon quietly whispered:

"Mimi status."

Another blue screen appeared immediately afterward.

And somehow—

It was worse.

Much worse.

Because unlike Si Hon’s relatively understandable status window, this one looked like somebody shoved an EXXAGERATED hardwork poured soul research paper into a microwave and called it a tutorial.

The glowing text expanded endlessly through the rain filled air.

「Name: Proto-Bond Ring — Han Gyeol Mimi

Status: Dormant Seed (Phase 1 / 8) Binding: Soul-Linked — Temporary Lock Removal: Unavailable till phase 4/8

Growth Condition. Absorption Target: Dead organic entities only. Absorption Progress: 32 / 80 Bodies. Boss-class entities: Locked. 2/8 Absorption requires direct contact.

Tips; Host is vulnerable during the process.

Passive Effects: Proto ring— Mimi can pass through the system and use it at her own will Minor. Vital Resonance. Slight fatigue suppression. Body temperature stabilization. Massive regeneration effects. Body enhancement.

Host Sync — Lv. 1 Ring(Mimi) reacts automatically to lethal intent and cannot be manually activated

Growth Inheritance. For each successful absorption: +0.1 Strength (value scales slightly with absorbed entity’s strength) Inheritance is PERMANENTLY retained. Gains are diminished for weak entities

Example: Low-tier monster → +0.1 STR Mid-tier monster → +0.2 ~ 0.3 STR High-tier monster → Locked (Phase restriction)」

Rain continued falling softly while the massive wall of glowing text kept scrolling downward... endlessly...

Growth conditions.

Body absorption.

Permanent stat inheritance.

Fatal intent synchronization.

Passives

Host vulnerability.

Every new line somehow sounded more cliche than the previous one.

Behind Si Hon, the others silently watched the horrifying system explanation unfold with the exact emotional energy of students realizing the final exam was written in a ancient demon language.

Aeloria’s expression slowly became more complicated the longer she read.