I Am Tired Of Being A Hero

Chapter 322: Extra (ABO) Prequel: The Little Stone at Fengdu R

Alvar did not know how old he was. He was just a stone by the Fengdu River. He sat faithfully for thousands of years by the river until he gained a soul.

The spiritual energy in the Palace of Judgement was immense, allowing the stone to condense a spirit form after countless years.

When Alvar gained sentience, he had neither joy nor sorrow in his heart. His nature as a stone made him unable to be whimsical as the flowers that gained sentience near him and his towering form made them afraid to befriend him.

Alvar did not mind. Time went on.

All living things were to be subjected to trials of fate, Alvar was more than content to sit there harmlessly for over another millennium until...

He came.

A man had walked into the backyard of the Palace of Judgement and sat in his true form.

Beautiful. Was the first thought in Alvar’s head. The man was barefoot. His feet were white with a layer of light red. The delicate ankles looked as if he could grasp them with one hand. Even the toenails were particularly round and lovely, like peach blossom petals.

Alvar felt an emotion he had never felt before. He wanted to see this person. He separated from the stone and stood in front of the man, gazing unabashedly at him.

The hem of the man’s robe reached the ground; the inner white garment was embroidered with dark gold patterns. A brocade-embroidered seven-headed snake was woven on each shoulder, and the belt was ringed with ribbons.

His posture was as erect as a noble person, one hand was gathered in the sleeve, and the other slowly rolled a white jade string of beads.

The man was lean, with a high, straight nose and extremely beautiful features. His pupils were whitish grey, the same colour as his stone. That thought pleased Alvar.

His long, slightly curly hair was scattered, his appearance was stunningly beautiful.

Alvar had never seen anything as beautiful as the man in front of him.

He could not help himself.

In that instant, his hand had already reached out to the man’s face.

Fengdu felt as cool fingertips touched his cheek.

Alvar’s fingers traced from between the man’s eyebrows across his brow to his temple. The more he looked, the more his chest felt heavy.

Even though he had not felt this area since he achieved sentience, Alvar was not a fool. He had seen many officials sneak into the backyard to confess to different flowers.

He quickly put a name to the emotion he was feeling.

’Like.’

The man’s sideburns were trimmed very precisely and neatly, his skin smooth and delicate.

From the temple, his hand moved slowly to press several major acupoints at the back of his head, while his gaze remained fixed on Fengdu’s face.

The man obediently allowed him to do as he pleased and it made the feeling in his chest increase a lot more.

Like. He really liked it.

He was so fascinated that he noticed how the entire backyard that was always filled with the chattering of birds or flower spirits had gone completely silent.

The corner of the man’s lips curled slightly.

Even though Alvar didn’t know what the beautiful man was delighted with, seeing him happy, he, too, awkwardly offered him a wide smile complete with two rows of sparkling white teeth.

"I..." Alvar has never attempted to have a conversation with anyone so he was a bit lost on how to begin. In the end, he settled for honesty, "Like. I like you."

He heard the man laugh. It sounded so good.

The man moved closer to him and Alvar suddenly stepped backwards. He did not know why he felt so hot. He was a stone near the Fengdu River, he had always been cold but now, he felt like a fire was burning in his face.

"You like me? Why?" His voice was gentle and warm yet Alvar’s spine felt cold.

He pushed the feeling aside. He did not want to spend time thinking when he could be looking at the man. Why? Alvar gazed at that face again, so pretty.

"Beautiful."

"What a straightforward little fool. You must have been born quite recently."

Alvar shook his head and then smiled widely. He was not sure if he liked being called a fool, but he liked the man talking to him. He stretched his hand, wanting to touch his face again but the man held both his wrists.

Alvar frowned and tried to remove the man’s hand but he could not. The force of those delicate wrists was heavier than stones. Alvar was crestfallen, his big eyes glistened like a puppy. Since he gained sentience, he had never been bullied like this.

Why was this beautiful man bullying him?

He looked at the man and surprisingly the weight on his wrist reduced. Alvar smiled widely. Not only was this man beautiful, but he was also kind. Alvar liked it even more. His gaze towards the man was filled with stars.

"Kind? What a little fool."

Alvar used a hand to cover his mouth, not believing that he had said his thoughts out loud.

The man laughed again. "Forget it. Since you said I am kind, I would let you go. Kind people don’t bully fools after all."

The man disappeared and Alvar felt a painful lurch in his heart. The beautiful man had gone. The backyard that had always felt so comfortable to Alvar felt like something was lacking.

The next day, Alvar left the Palace of Judgement’s backyard to look for the beautiful man.

It was a very long time before Alvar met the beautiful man again and by then, he learnt the identity of the man.

King Yama, the first of the Ten Kings, King of Qin, Judge of Humans, and the Brother of the Netherworld Emperor. Fengdu.

Each title should only inspire fear but Alvar was not deterred. He joined the Netherworld army, doing everything he can to stand in front of the person he liked.

His comrades called him stubborn and pigheaded, their advice fell on deaf ears.

The more he saw him, the more he liked and the more he wanted to get closer to him.

When he got closer, the more his heart hurt, he wanted to hug him tighter.

Fengdu could be cruel and jealous. He hurts him sometimes.

One time his words hurt Alvar so much. It made him so sad that he rammed headlong into the stone crying his eyes out.

If it were someone else who had bullied him, he would’ve returned the favor tenfold. But it was FenFen who had bullied me... it was FenFen so he could only let myself be bullied. He not only couldn’t win against him, he couldn’t even let him go.

He liked him. He really liked him.

But sometimes Fengdu was so kind and he looked so lonely.

"Fenfen, I like you. I like you a lot."

Alvar’s confessions were naïve and sincere. He did not know how to flatter his lover and could only coax him simply, as if pulling out his heart to prove his sincerity.

"Fenfen! They posted me to Styx. Would you come and visit me? Promise me?"

"That is a promise."

"FenFen, they...they said that before we leave, it is good to get a token from our...our.." His entire face flushed red.

"Token?" Fengdu reached for his hair, pulling the ribbon and handing it to him.

He stayed in Styx for more than 100 years, demons from the tear continued to ascend but Fengdu never came for him.

Ghostly blades pierced his skin. Alvar held the white ribbon even tighter as he thrust his heavy spear.

He was adding injuries to injuries, his black clothes already soaked as spirit leaked from his body, dripping onto the grass.

In the haze of the violence, Alvar just yearned for one thing. Despite being injured to the point of staggering, he still stood straight, his eyes searching.

Suddenly, it was as if sunshine appeared, sprinkling over the ground, illuminating the blood red spider lilies with its radiance. It reminded Alvar of the first time he had seen Fengdu.

But it was an illusion. Fengdu is not coming. He was going to die and he would not see Fengdu again. He wanted to see him one more time. Wanted him to strike his hair gently and call him little fool one more time.

His eyes held a different kind of moisture. Tears mixed with spirit qi trickled down his cheeks, disappearing into the darkness below.

Duan Xu cried. Surging emotions suffocated his chest, he could feel it, he was dying.

But he refused to fall to the ground.

He could only sob, his voice filled with grievance, "FenFen, you promised me."