How to Survive as the Second Son of a Mage Family

Chapter 335

Chapter 335

BANG―!

How was the night of the first timeline I remember for the last time?

“Leo.”

I remember the door, which was definitely locked tight, falling off due to magic. A voice that was so cracked that even pronouncing a three-letter word seemed burdensome hovered by my ears. That day was a peaceful day just one day before the strategy test, and it was a day when Lukas, who never visited me after saying the last greeting of the day, rarely intruded into my room.

“Leo.”

Lukas stood holding the door and called my name repeatedly just as I had done to him sometime in the past. I should have asked what was going on at this hour, but upon seeing his expression, I had no choice but to stiffen as I was. I creaked my head, took out the handkerchief I always carried, and approached him. The moment I saw his eyes, fragments of what he had gone through flowed into me. Memories of the next day that cannot exist for me, information of an incident that should not happen, fell and embedded themselves from somewhere. Even though I was definitely here, there was a time I was sitting in front of him bleeding. The only memory that touched me more certainly was the last moment he met me. The emotions I felt seeing Lukas who came to find me at the end raged through my whole body. That event which already happened in some world will soon become my future. My head went blank and I couldn't say anything. How much time passed? Something that sounded distantly far away like someone else's voice squeezed out of my mouth.

“Are you okay?”

There was no answer coming back. I waited, but Lukas smacked his lips for a long time and looked at the empty air. As if the answer was there, no, like a person who left something somewhere, his eyes looking at the empty air were persistent even though they held no more hope. He spoke in a low, hoarse voice without meeting my eyes until the end.

“I am glad you are alive.”In his memory, I did not die. However, I would have lost my mind and had to spend the rest of my life as Pleroma, and since I would refuse that and die before long, it was natural for him to consider me a dead person in the future. However, for me to be the person hearing that it is a relief I am alive, my head went cold at that fact without my realizing. It was absurd. In the memories I read, Lukas was dying. The incomplete scenes conveyed by sensory organs that were already not functioning properly proved it.

“That is what I should say, Lukas.”

“Sorry I couldn't come back together. I am telling you in advance because I am going to go back only with you from now on.”

“…….”

I tried to continue speaking but was beaten to the punch by him. My heart went cold at those words that he would go back only with me from now on. Yes, if Lukas does not attempt the best, the ending of my existence is fixed to only one ending, that is, being tortured to death by Pleroma hands. Even if the me of that timeline which is already finished cannot be helped, if Lukas did not turn back time in that situation, the me surviving even in another timeline would not exist. Lukas said there is a high possibility that the previous time stops as it is when he turns back time. He didn't tell me on what basis he says that, but if the previous time really stops immediately by Lukas turning back time, yes, in this case too, naturally turning back time is the best choice. I also knew that fact. Lukas apologized of his own will, but this was not something to blame Lukas for at all, and rather, I owed him my future.

However, apart from that painful fact, it was unreasonable that Lukas had to bear all the burdens. Right now, he was practically insisting that he would retrieve my artifact.

“Why do you decide that alone? You can think about it after preparing sufficiently like we have done so far.”

“I think your answer will always be the same.”

“…….”

Lukas, who finally observed my expression, smiled faintly and spoke in a whisper with a voice drained of strength.

“I turned it back leaving tight time to bring your memories this time. Even if I can't preserve the memories after the kidnapping, I should at least preserve the time spent with you after entering here for you. After that, since it hasn't been updated yet, I have to go back further while it remains. It's only twenty-two times.”

I wanted to ask what hasn't been updated and what is only twenty-two times, but Lukas seemed to be in a rush. It seemed he even brought up words he didn't intend to say to me.

“First, I am going to cancel the exam. It was nice meeting you again, and let's talk about the details next time.”

“Lukas, wait!”

I stood up from my seat to grab his arm, but Lukas warped and escaped that spot. He warped, to where? It felt like I was hit on the head with a hammer because I couldn't believe what I saw.

“…….”

Yes. I could understand. Since it was miraculous enough that he walked here intact even after seeing me like that and the dead Senior with his two eyes, I understood that he exercised the maximum consideration he could show in this situation. Since he only had thoughts of saving me, himself, and Albert Mecklenburg in his head right now, it was not unreasonable for him to move to devise a countermeasure as soon as possible.

When I opened my eyes the next day, our strategy exam had been cancelled. We, who heard the notice of indefinite postponement, stopped by the official residence again just before mobilization. And we fell into the Middle World.

Lukas turned back time before experiencing everything. This time, since it was not during an exam, I was dragged away while wearing the artifact he gave me, and the memories of the kidnapping remained even though he turned back time. I remember the short conversation I shared with him just before starting the meeting with friends. Lukas leaned against the outer wall of the meeting room, cast sound insulation magic, and spoke while looking at the empty air.

“The mages will go missing today. If blocking the exam was wrong, let's go back to the start.”

“…….”

“First of all, right. Senior Albertina Hohenzollern didn't fall with you, Leo.”

“…Right. Because you and Senior Mecklenburg interfered with the Middle World magic, we could fall into strange places together. I fell alone in the middle of enemy lines.”

“Memories?”

His interest was entirely on my memories. Looking down at those cold eyes that were noticeably dyed with hostility in the span of a day, I turned my head.

“Naturally, I didn't go to the end because you cut it off. I fought against seven Monsignors of Brandenburg, and the information cut off when I heard them requesting support.”

“Amazing. You fought seven Monsignors single-handedly?”

Well, because we prepared everything after your regression. Lukas smiled with his eyes even with a face that couldn't laugh. Even in this situation, he was gentle when treating me. Even after that, there was such peace in every interlude. Like a couple of drops of whiskey left inside a flask, that amount of peace was allowed to us. With an imminent bomb in front of us, we had no choice but to run forward knowing we would die and have to start again. No, Lukas did so, and I could only watch. That made me helpless the whole time.

It was a failure. The magic scholar disappearance case exploded again, and there was nothing we could prevent. This time, we decided to take the exam again. Just before the exam, Lukas reached out his hand to me with no expression. It was clear what he was demanding. When I answered with silence, Lukas looked into my eyes and opened his mouth slowly.

“Right, I decided to be with you. But this isn't it.”

“…….”

“I might not have said this if you had died honorably in battle. But this wasn't that. What I saw wasn't something like that. Leo, I am not saying you must always be healthy or that I will be with you only when you are like that, but….”

The end of his neat voice trembled minutely. However, those eyes were firmer than ever.

“There is no need to undergo unnecessary fatigue.”

“Then you.”

“…….”

“Is driving yourself to the extreme until you see death countless times and your senses don't function not important because you can just turn back time anyway?”

I know. This is unreasonable. I said such things knowing that. At my cold voice, Lukas smiled faintly and answered.

“You would know best of all that it's not such a simple sound. I have to turn back time no matter what I do. Someone definitely dies a few days later, and it's a situation where I can't even imagine how uncontrollably chaotic it will become later if I leave this matter as Pleroma's victory. Whether living in a world without Senior Mecklenburg or you, surviving barely while everyone is irreversibly sick, dying alone, or turning back time, I can only choose one of the four, and in a situation with only these kinds of choices, I will always turn back time no matter what happens.”

“…….”

“Look, Leo. Being able to change the future by turning back time is the most hopeful option for me. But it's not for you. The best choice remaining for me is the worst choice for you.”

Lukas's voice now unexpectedly contained laughter. While doing so, he still spoke with a voice that cracked minutely at the end.

“You have the right not to remember.”

“I won't exercise that right. You mean to leave you alone in that time? Until now….”

“Yes. I have to see you looking at the world straight with eyes like today and being alive even on the day after the exam. That is my happiness. If I say this much, can you accept it and move on?”

I did not answer. Lukas, who spoke like a rapid-fire gun while looking straight at me, now dropped his gaze downwards and spoke as if talking to himself.

“The end doesn't happen at once.”

“…….”

“It happens over a long time. Everything becomes a stepping stone heading towards the end, starting from trivial fatigue that you didn't even know was a fuse to unforgettable memories. Everything ends after that, similarly at a trivial moment. Because it rained this morning when you were only waiting to see the sun, because you had a trivial argument, because a plan that was nothing but everything went wrong, because a certain memory suddenly came to mind….”

I smacked my lips without realizing. I intuitively felt he was telling a different story. Words that were not exactly completed floated around disassembled here and there without connecting to the front. Lukas was not looking at me now.

“Even if you think you are okay, you don't know that until you go to the end of the road. The things you go through are not simply momentary pain but things that wear down the soul. Why do you have to go through such things?”

“…….”

“If you can avoid remembering, if there is such a chance, I hoped that chance would be given. I don't think you will want what I wanted, but I just hope you don't come to think the same as me. I hope you are even a little less tired.”

I looked at such a Lukas without a word. It seemed he was telling a completely different person's story, and also seemed to be telling his own story. Lukas stayed blankly as if possessed by something, then moved his gaze to me with his usual eyes when the notification for 5 minutes before the exam start was heard.

“I won't respect your intent. Hand over the artifact. If you don't give it, I will use Divine Power to knock you out.”

“…That’s funny. You’re saying that on purpose.”

Saying he wouldn't respect it;

it was a remark with zero credibility coming from him, though it might be different if it were another friend. He was a person who respected me more than anyone in the Imperial Second Academy. Lukas looked at me without a word for a long time. Only after about a few minutes passed did he barely open his mouth.

“Yes.”

Shall I speak honestly?

At those words, for a moment, I lost the confidence to look at his face. Now he would not hide his sincerity inside the consideration called a joke. I wanted that, and at the same time, did not have the courage to face it. Even so, I did not avoid Lukas's eyes as always. For the first time in my life, I saw his eyes soaked in despair.

“I want you not to remember. Please.”

I was not a person who could go against a friend's will after seeing such eyes. His method and my method were different at this moment, but it was clear that he was projecting himself onto me and fearing something, and also, that he was doing it for my safety.

I was chosen this time too….

And at the same time, I would not be chosen again.

After that, Lukas acted like a crazy person. He moved here and there recklessly without time to even see faces, and whenever he treated Albert Mecklenburg, he always stared at him intently. Until Albert Mecklenburg turned his head first with an uncomfortable expression. He turned back time continuously, turned it back, and turned it back again. On the day of the fifth failure, reading the memory of him blowing off one arm and robbing Brandenburg of information, I thought I could no longer leave him alone. And coincidentally, from the moment I decided not to hand over the earring to him, he was not seen in front of me. Yes, for the past week, he intentionally avoided me. He took leaves making trivial excuses and willfully skipped every mobilization. Twenty-two times, I repeated the words he spat out when he was frantic in my head, and every time I did, my blood dried up.

THUD―

―Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.

The Divine Power released the tension that had stiffened the whole body. A vague belief that rest would come soon dominated the mind. The hazy mind was pushed back and the things in front began to be seen clearly.

“It’s hard to see these eyes for once.”

Nicolaus's blue eyes flash receiving the light of Divine Power burning from below. Those lips were finally curved softly containing liberation and satisfaction. Now there was no desire in those eyes. As soon as I saw those irises that were exceptionally bright inside, the dozens of times he turned flashed through my head like the film of a projector winding while making a sharp sound. Twenty-two times, seventeen times…. I let out a faint laugh feeling my mind becoming distant for some reason. He spent several days in this place. The opportunity to make up for it that he mentioned must have run out now. I saw his neck and shirt soaked in blood. He looked like this in all the past numerous days, and he was like that today too. There was no place that was intact. I wanted to ask what he does to make blood flow from his ears, and if he can hear sounds. Lukas untied the cloth wrapped around my mouth and tied behind my head and threw it away. The tongue that had been pressed down had stiffened a long time ago and didn't move as I wanted. No, I thought so, but my mouth moved on its own and spat out a crooked remark.

“Satisfied?”

“…….”

Lukas opened his mouth without a word, surprised for a moment. His gaze was fixed on my eyes. Soon he smiled with a bitter face.

“Why are you crying? It’s a happy day.”

“Well, I am angry at myself.”

If I were a little stronger, this wouldn't have happened. However, there is no way that is possible without Divine Power against tens and hundreds of Pleroma. Unless there is magic close to god, magic with the property of purification that interferes with the soul-mind. To supplement the lacking Magic Power amount and aggression, what I have is only skill and effort. I know how useless and irrational it is to blame myself for things that don't change. I know clearly, but having to watch a friend suffer from that was hell. When my lack is a problem limited only to the individual called me, that no longer gives me any frustration, but the fact that a friend suffered countless times from that, that alone and nothing else made me painful.

Even if I received the artifact from him and lived through all that time together, the fact that Lukas had to turn back time this much and experience that many deaths does not change. So, this was no longer a problem of the artifact. The feeling of wanting to demand why he did that to Lukas also definitely squirmed, but that was secondary.

Lukas, who was looking down at me with surprised eyes, answered in a low voice.

“Me too.”

“…….”

“But the side that caused this mess is the other side, so why should we feel guilt? Anyway, we eventually succeeded in making this world. That is all we need to think about right now.”

Lukas smiled nonchalantly. And he pointed to my hands tied behind my back.

“Shall I take off the restraints?”

“Then are you going to go without taking them off?”

“Your wrists are choked, and it still hurts, so I'm worried what to do.”

“…….”

Spouting nonsense. Attacks received in Mimesis disappear as they are. When I narrowed my eyes containing such meaning, Lukas laughed as if he understood and rummaged through the clothes of a fallen Pleroma. He approached throwing something like a magnet lightly upward.

“Before, another Pleroma also carried this in his jacket inner pocket, the method is similar. At that time you came to save me, remember?”

“Was it December last year?”

“Probably. The situation has become opposite to that time…. Only I hear this all the time, so I wanted to try saying this once too.”

What words? I looked up at him with my eyes still narrowed.

CLANG―

The sound of restraints falling was heard. Lukas cleared his throat and said with a playful smile.

“Let's go back.”

***

“Luka present~!”

As I was lying on the hospital room bed blinking only my eyes, Elias tore a newspaper in half and threw it into the air. Grey paper flew around and fell onto the bed and floor. I jumped up, snatched the paper trying to fall on my face, and said.

“What kind of behavior is this?”

“It flies well if you tear it.”

“Are you kidding….”

After finishing the procedures, I slept for a whole day straight and woke up, and now was a moment 12 hours passed even from then. It was after everything was finished. I pieced together the newspaper and read the letters.

[Pleroma Brandenburg Archdiocese Priests 199 Captured Alive]

[Pleroma Brandenburg Archdiocese-Hamburg Archdiocese-Mölitz Diocese Bishop Corps 2 Killed, 13 Captured… Discussion on Disposition Underway]

[German Empire Special Operations Command, Destruction of Brandenburg Archdiocese]

“Destruction? They say it like this?”

“Hahahaha!”

At my reluctant reaction, Elias sat with his arms crossed and burst into laughter. I read all of the first page of the newspaper which was decorated unnecessarily grandly as if we had won a war or something and lay down again.

It was really the end. The time I was there felt like a lie now. The smell of blood and everything felt only distant now. The friends except me were all roaming around energetically without being hospitalized, and looking at Elias right now would give the answer. Narce was called regarding the loss of the Holy Nail when the portal opened and hasn't returned yet.

Now the problem was Leo. After I woke up, he looked at my face without a word and went outside without greeting me and wasn't coming back. It wasn't that I didn't know the reason. The moment he saw me, he must have read all the time I went through. I already knew well that even if I tried to hide the time I passed in front of him, I couldn't. Furthermore…. Since I avoided him the whole time in this timeline, even if he holds memories of the previous timeline, it was understandable for him to be angry about that. Feeling my insides clogged up tight, I asked.

“Eli. Where is Leo?”

“There is a day you ask where Leo is. Pay attention to me who is in front of your eyes too~”

“I am paying attention. To cleaning up the newspaper.”

“Ah~ it shouldn't be this direction.”

Elias laughed lightly, brought his body close to me, and spoke seriously.

“Luka, listen well. Leo said he's pissed off and not coming.”

CREAK―

“What are you talking about.”

It wasn't me who spoke. I turned my head to the opened door. Leo, who entered saying that, did not greet me even though our gazes met. For some reason he was wearing a short-sleeved shirt, and perhaps because he had an injury on his forearm, a bandage was wrapped around it. He approached with a face calmer than usual, sat down, and spoke quietly.

“How is it? The feeling.”

“…….”

I bit my lip slightly.

‘It feels helpless already.’

To speak honestly, my breath is getting blocked. At that rescue site, he couldn't have been saying all his thoughts and inner feelings in a row, but now is different. It was sufficiently his turn to interrogate me about everything. I opened my mouth to say something, stopped, and opened my mouth again.

“You hurt your arm.”

“Huh? Ah, yes.”

Leo answered flatly and smiled faintly. Since neither he nor Elias said any more words, I was about to give up speaking too, but feeling that this atmosphere would freeze uncontrollably if I did, I examined Leo's appearance from the head to bring up a topic to divert attention appropriately.

“Um, where did the artifact on your ear go?”

“Which one.”

“The one I gave you.”

“…Oh~”

Elias exclaimed with strangely crinkled eyes. Leo did not answer. Instead, he only stared at me intently while shrugging his shoulders with his arms crossed.

“…….”

For some reason, I felt a strange anxiety instinctively. Even while knowing well that I was thinking crazy thoughts myself, I slowly reached out my hand. Leo moved as I turned his head if I turned it. Really, there was only a piercing mark on his ear and no artifact. I grabbed his collar and checked if there was a necklace hanging. Naturally, there wasn't.

Thoughts bounced increasingly in another direction. I only now recalled that Leo wearing a short-sleeved shirt that didn't fit the season, and beyond that, him entering here wearing only a shirt when he always even wears a jacket, was quite strange behavior. Surely not, it couldn't be, but surely not….

GRAB―

I grabbed the bandage on his forearm. Only then did Leo smirk and speak.

“It hurts.”

The ‘surely not’ actually happened. I looked blankly at his face and shook my head.

“…You are really crazy.”

“More than you?”

“I….”

“You did it several times.”

My speech was blocked shut. A vain laugh squeezed out of my mouth. I felt Elias, who didn't know the meaning of his words, looking at Leo with a puzzled face only now. Only then did Leo smile his characteristic fishy smile and speak.

“Now there is no way to back out? Unless you slice my arm open with a knife.”