novelraw Chapter 65: ✦ Unconscious Regressor [1] ✦
Chapter 65: ✦ Unconscious Regressor [1] ✦
Lee Kang-Joon did not collapse right away.
That was the strange part.
His body faltered—yes—but it didn’t betray him instantly the way it always had before. The pain came late, dull and compressed, as though someone had wrapped his heart in both hands and was slowly squeezing.
The backstage hallway smelled like sweat and hairspray.
Someone was laughing.
Someone else was crying.
The echo of the Daesang announcement still rang faintly in the building, distorted by walls and distance. Kang-Joon leaned his palm against the concrete wall, grounding himself, breathing carefully.
*Not now.*
He had thought that so many times before.
This was supposed to be different.
They had won. STEL-R stood at the top now. The scandals had passed. The rumors were quiet. The charts were stable. The fans were loyal. Everything that had killed him in other timelines had already been cleared.
There was no reason—
His vision darkened at the edges.
Kang-Joon inhaled sharply.
His legs buckled.
The world tilted sideways, and then he was on the floor, cheek pressed against cold concrete, lights blurring into long white streaks above him.
"Hyung!"
Do-Hyun’s voice.
Panicked. Close.
Hands grabbed Kang-Joon’s shoulders, shaking him lightly.
"Hyung, hey—look at me. Hyung!"
Kang-Joon wanted to answer.
He wanted to say *I’m fine*, wanted to lie the way he always did.
But his throat wouldn’t move.
His chest seized, breath stalling halfway in.
The pain sharpened—not explosive, not dramatic, but suffocating. Like drowning on dry land.
*So it’s happening again.*
The realization didn’t come with fear.
Only exhaustion.
---
The sounds around him stretched, warped, and dulled, as if someone had lowered the volume of the world.
Then—
Everything stopped.
Not darkness.
Not unconsciousness.
A pause.
A complete, unnatural stillness.
And then the system appeared.
Not as a floating window.
Not as text in front of his eyes.
It unfolded directly inside his awareness, crisp and intrusive, overriding thought itself.
---
[SYSTEM CONNECTION ESTABLISHED]
[ SUBJECT IDENTIFIED: LEE KANG-JOON]
[STATUS: NON-PRIMARY VARIABLE]
Kang-Joon felt something inside him sink.
*Non-primary?*
---
[REGRESSION COUNT: 97]
The number sat there, heavy and final.
Kang-Joon clenched his teeth.
"So I was right," he thought. "Ninety-seven."
He had stopped counting a long time ago.
---
[ERROR]
[Subject assumption incorrect]
The words appeared instantly, indifferent.
---
[CLARIFICATION]
[ Subject has experienced regression effects without ownership.]
Ownership.
The word lodged itself in his chest.
---
[PRIMARY REGRESSOR IDENTIFIED]
The screen refreshed.
For a brief, cruel moment, Kang-Joon expected his own name.
Instead—
---
[DO-HYUN]
[ROLE: PRIMARY LOOP OWNER]
---
Kang-Joon’s thoughts fractured.
"No," he tried to say.
The word never reached his mouth.
---
[NOTICE]
[ Vocal output disabled during disclosure phase]
---
Images poured into him without warning.
Not memories.
Not emotions.
Data.
Timelines stacked on top of one another like transparent film.
Do-Hyun on stage, smiling brightly under harsh lights.
Do-Hyun bowing too deeply.
Do-Hyun practicing alone long after midnight.
Do-Hyun staring at his phone in a dark dorm room.
Do-Hyun debuting.
Do-Hyun breaking.
The endings varied.
The beginning never did.
---
[PRIMARY LOOP CONDITION]
[Psychological collapse of Primary Regressor triggers reset]
Kang-Joon’s breathing stuttered.
Psychological... collapse?
---
[ADDITIONAL DATA]
[Primary Regressor does not consciously recognize regression]
[Loop activation occurs when desire to continue living as "Do-Hyun the idol" falls below survival threshold]
The words hollowed him out.
He thought of Do-Hyun’s smile.
The way he always said he was fine.
The way he tried harder every time something went wrong.
He wasn’t trying to survive.
He was trying to disappear properly.*
---
[SECONDARY VARIABLE IDENTIFIED]
[LEE KANG-JOON]
[ROLE: STABILIZING ANCHOR]
Kang-Joon laughed soundlessly.
"So that’s what I was."
---
[ANCHOR FUNCTION]
[Maintain environmental continuity and emotional balance for Primary Regressor]
[Absorb excess instability]
The deaths.
The accidents.
The poisonings.
The seizures.
None of them had been random.
---
[ANCHOR FAILURE RATE: 100%]
[CAUSE]
[ Primary Regressor’s core despair remains unresolved]
Kang-Joon’s vision shook.
"I did everything," he thought desperately.
"I fixed the schedules. I prevented scandals. I took the blame. I carried the damage."
He had bent every version of himself into something useful.
---
[SYSTEM RESPONSE]
[ Actions addressed surface variables only]
[Root cause unaltered]
---
"What is the root cause?" Kang-Joon demanded.
This time, the system answered.
---
[ROOT CAUSE]
[Primary Regressor perceives self-existence as conditional.]
[ Idol identity is treated as debt, not desire]
Kang-Joon understood immediately.
Do-Hyun didn’t want to stand on stage.
He wanted permission to stay.
---
[CURRENT REGRESSION STATUS]
[Termination confirmed]
[Reset unavoidable]
Kang-Joon’s surroundings flickered back into partial existence.
The sound of alarms.
Shouting.
Hands pressing against his chest.
Do-Hyun’s voice, breaking as he called his name.
Kang-Joon focused on that sound.
On that one, fragile constant.
---
[FINAL NOTICE]
[Anchor Variable has reached limit]
[This timeline will be discarded]
"Wait," Kang-Joon thought.
"If it resets... then at least let me—"
---
[SYSTEM INTERRUPTION]
[New condition pending approval]
[ Subject eligible for continued participation]
Kang-Joon’s consciousness jolted.
---
[CONTRACT UPDATE]
[ Anchor Variable granted limited autonomy]
[ Failure penalty revised]
---
The words shifted.
Reformatted.
---
[SHARED TERMINATION CONDITION ACTIVATED]
[I f Primary Regressor fails to complete debut cycle with stable will to exist—
Anchor Variable will be terminated permanently]
Kang-Joon went cold.
"So if he breaks..." he thought.
"I die."
---
[CONFIRMED]
---
"And if I tell him?"
---
[DISCLOSURE RESTRICTION]
[Any attempt to reveal regression mechanics to Primary Regressor will result in immediate termination]
---
[RESET INITIATING]
---
The world folded inward.
---
Kang-Joon woke up gasping.
His lungs burned as if he’d been underwater.
He rolled off the narrow bed, coughing hard, palms scraping against a familiar, rough floor.
The smell of cheap detergent hit him instantly.
The hum of an old fan.
A buzzing phone alarm.
He froze.
Slowly, dreadfully, he looked around.
The trainee dorm.
Starline Entertainment.
Years ago.
---
[REGRESSION COMPLETE]
[COUNT: 98]
[ANCHOR STATUS: ACTIVE]
Kang-Joon sat up.
His hands trembled, but his mind was terrifyingly clear.
He looked at the system again.
A new interface hovered inside his awareness.
At the center—
[DO-HYUN — WILL TO EXIST: 64%]
Below it—
[ANCHOR LINK: CONNECTED]
At the bottom—
[FAILURE THRESHOLD: 0%]
---
"So that’s it," Kang-Joon murmured.
"This is my leash."
---
[OBJECTIVE UPDATED]
[ Ensure Primary Regressor develops intrinsic motivation to debut]
[ External pressure solutions discouraged]
Kang-Joon closed his eyes.
All those timelines.
All those deaths.
He hadn’t been cursed.
He had been collateral.
---
The dorm door slid open.
"Kang-Joon hyung!"
Do-Hyun stepped inside, younger, brighter, carrying the smell of instant coffee and restless energy.
"We’re gonna be late!"
He smiled.
The number flickered.
[63%]
Kang-Joon’s chest tightened.
---
Do-Hyun didn’t know.
He would never know.
And that was the cruelest part.
Kang-Joon stood up.
His posture was different now.
No desperation.
If he carried Do-Hyun again, the loop would never end.
If he abandoned him, they would both die.
"So this time..."
Kang-Joon thought, watching the boy who had unknowingly killed him ninety-seven times.
"I don’t save you."
"I make you choose yourself."