Cold Showers

Chapter Forty four

A few weeks later

Jayda couldn't help but think something was wrong with Lilian. It has been almost two weeks since She and Sebastian came back from their one week vacation and she hasn't seen Lilian.

Whenever Jayda called to greet her, She could tell something was not right and no matter how much she persuaded, Lilian would not say anything. Instead, she would give an excuse to end the call with Jay and also promise to call back but never did.

Jayda also reached out to Roman, Lily's boyfriend, maybe he would give her a hint on what was going on.

Roman assured her everything was fine but she found it hard to believe him.

Having decided that she has had enough, Jayda made up her mind to go visit Lilian; a surprise visit. She knew if she called to inform her that she was coming over, Lilian was going to make some silly excuses and give her lame reasons why she shouldn't show up.

After four rings, Lilian finally answered her door.

"W...what are y....you doing here?" She shuttered when she came face to face with her best friend.

Jayda took in her best friend's appearance and almost wondered if she was at the wrong apartment. Lilian wasn't looking like her usual self. She was putting on baggy pyjamas, her hair was in a rough messy bun and her eyes were swollen from crying.

Jayda walked into Lilian's apartment and settled on the couch without saying a word. She felt like the worst friend on earth; knowing Lilian was going through something that could make her tear up and Lilian could not talk to her about it.

Lily locked her door, made her way over to the couch and took a seat beside Jayda.

"What's wrong Lily?" Jayda asked with a heavy heart.

"Nothing" She replied, looking everywhere else except for Jayda.

She let out a sigh, "I know something is wrong, please tell me."

"Nothing is wrong, Jay!" Lilian whispered, looking down at her hands.

"You don't know how much I hate myself now because I feel like I've betrayed you. You are hurting, you need me and I've not been there for you. Please tell me what's wrong." Jayda pleaded.

A tear rolled down Lilian's cheek which she wiped away immediately with the back of her palm.

Jayda took Lilian's hands in hers and persuaded. "I've never judged you for anything and I won't start now. Please tell me what is going on."

Lilian heaved a sigh and for the first time that night, she looked into Jayda's worried eyes.

"R... Rome...Roman and I are no... no longer together." She shuttered.

A look of confusion overtook Jayda's face. She still spoke to Roman two days ago and he sounded like everything was fine.

"How??? When??? What happened?" Jayda asked after a while.

"I broke up with him," Lilian confessed with teary eyes.

Her confession made Jayda more confused. She knew Lilian and Roman were so much in love with each other and couldn't help but wonder what went wrong.

"Did he cheat on you?" Jayda asked with a heavy heart. Roman was like a brother to her, she didn't think he would stoop so low to hurt her best friend.

"No, he didn't." Lilian wiped another tear that rolled down her cheeks.

"Then what happened? Don't you love him anymore?" Jayda asked, almost in tears.

"I love Roman more than I love myself but I can't give him what he truly wants so I let him go."

"What do you mean? What does he truly want?"

Another set of tears rolled down Lilian's cheeks. This time she did not bother to wipe them off. "A baby. He wants us to have a child and since I can't give him one, I had to let him go."

Jayda was shocked by Lilian's revelation. She didn't know her best friend was going through something like this and refused to open up to her.

"Did he ever threaten to leave you?" Jayda asked with tear-filled eyes.

"He didn't. I broke up with him because I know he will eventually break up with me. We've been trying for a baby long before he left for Australia."

"While he was away, I went for check-ups, took vitamins that would boost my fertility, ate healthy and did everything that the doctor recommended. And when Roman came back, we kept trying but all the results came out negative."

As at this time, tears were rolling down Jayda's cheeks.

"Why didn't you tell me, Lilian? I'm your best friend. You were going through something this crucial and you didn't inform me." Jayda was mad at herself, perhaps if she had paid more attention, she would have noticed something wasn't right with Lilian.

"You had so much on your plate, I didn't want to bother you."

"You were always there for me Lilian, being there for you too would cost me nothing." Jayda cried. "God, I'm so sorry, Lily." Jayda pulled her best friend into a hug and they cried together.

After a while, Lily pulled away from the hug and continued where she left off. "I told Roman that we could find an alternative but he refused all my suggestions. He was against surrogacy and he wouldn't even consent for us to start an IVF journey."

"He's a brilliant and well-known Doctor, he can use his connections to fast track the process but he refused no matter how much I pleaded."

"He's scared of allowing me to go through the process, he's scared I'll be broken and probably fall into depression if the process didn't work. He said he will never stop loving me, with or without kids, he said we would keep trying and if we still can't conceive, we will opt for adoption. Because of that, we got into a fight. I accused him of being selfish because he could easily look for another woman and impregnate her."

"I feel weak Jayda, I feel useless. Roman wants a child and I can't give him one. I see the way he looks at other kids and that breaks my heart every time. I want to become a mother too. I'm almost 32, if it doesn't happen now, what hope do I have that it's going to happen in the future?" Lilian burst into another round of tears.

Jayda embraced her into a hug. She wished there was something she could do to make her best friend's pain go away.

"So I broke up with him. I can't give him what he wants so it's better for us to go our separate ways." Lilian completed.

Jayda reached for Lily's hands and looked into her swollen eyes. "We will go through this. You will get pregnant with your own baby and give birth to him or her just like how I'm going to give birth to your goddaughter."

"I will talk to Roman, we will figure out something. I will also talk to my mom, she used to be a nurse, She will tell us what to do." Jayda assured.

"For now I want you to stop crying. It's not good for your health and I don't want you to get sick. Remember, only a healthy body can carry a healthy baby so I want you to put you and your health first. Okay?"

Lilian bit her lip and nodded.

"Thank Goodness tomorrow is Saturday, I'll be staying here for the night."

"You don't have to Jayda. Your family is waiting for you at home. They need you, don't worry about me, I'll be fine." She reasoned.

Leaving Lilian right now was the last thing on Jayda's mind. She was afraid Lilian was going to hurt herself when she left so it was better she stayed back and watched over her. Lilian would have done the same thing for her."

"You need me too so I'll stay with you. Sebastian and Aaron can manage without me for tonight."

"Are you sure?" Lilian asked.

Jayda nodded. "I know you've not eaten all day. What do you feel like taking?"

"I'm not hungry," Lilian whispered.

"Will you manage a few slices of pizza? I don't want you to go to bed on an empty stomach."

"Seriously Jay! I'm okay." Lilian assured.

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that," Jayda said, reached for her phone and dialled a pizza shop.

Jayda pulled Lilian into a final hug and whispered in her ear. "Everything will be fine" She promised.

Lilian nodded. "I want to soak myself in the tub for some minutes I'll be right back."

Jayda looked at Lily with a 'please don't do anything stupid look'

"I promise not to do anything stupid." She said but Jayda was not convinced.

She accompanied Lilian to her bathroom and prepared a bath for her. Then she gave her some privacy but promised to check up on her in a few minutes.

..........

When Jayda got to the living room, she reached for her phone and dialled Sebastian.

"Hi, love." She said to the other side. From the way she sounded, Seb could tell all was not well.

"Heyy, is Lilian okay?" He asked, concerned.

"No, she's not. She and Roman are currently going through a rough patch. It's a long story, I will explain when we see. Do you mind if I stay over for the night? Lilian needs me."

"Sure, She would have done the same for you in haste. Don't worry, Aaron and I will be fine. We will come over tomorrow morning with breakfast."

"Thanks. Give Aaron a kiss for me. I'll see you guys tomorrow."

"I will. Take care of yourself and my little miracle. My regards to Lilian. I love you."

"I love you too babe, Goodnight," Jayda ended the call.