Apocalypse Survival Guide

Chapter 166 : Rescue Fantasy (37)

Rescue Fantasy (37)

'...... Is he asleep?'

Celestia quietly got up and went over to where Lee Hyun-woo was. She checked on his condition.

Because he had pushed himself too much, Hyun-woo was sleeping very deeply. Noticing that his bulky suit with thick gloves had been changed for something much lighter, she guessed that someone must have helped him while he was asleep.

The same was true for her. Her clothes were now lighter. The weight of the suit that had been pressing down on her body was gone, but strangely, she felt a suffocating tightness inside.

'Hoo...'

Celestia sighed quietly to herself, trying to relieve even a bit of this tightness, as she sat beside the makeshift bed where Lee Hyun-woo was lying. She gazed quietly at him.

What should she say? No, how should she think about it?

Celestia recalled what had happened in the underground sector beneath the mining base Heaven. When she was trapped in memories of the past by a mysterious fragment in the laboratory, she had been so exhausted that she'd almost given up on life.

It hadn't been enough to finally face the past she'd been avoiding; she was pulled into it so completely that her mind couldn't take it.

In that moment, right on the brink of death, Hyun-woo had saved her. He had even said exactly the words she most needed to hear. After that, everything had felt strange, almost as if it were a dream.

To be precise, only Celestia had felt that way.

Hyun-woo had simply done everything he could to escape, while she'd felt confused because of something Hyun-woo had said so casually.

That confusion had begun when Hyun-woo said he knew this place. That he knew. Just those few words, yet they had sent huge ripples through her.

'How?'

How did he know? That was the place where Celestia had spent her childhood. It had been a safe house that Myosotis had prepared on Earth.

Because of that, no one but a person of Myosotis would know its location—in fact, the very existence of the place was a secret.

So how could Hyun-woo possibly know it? She considered the possibility that he was simply mistaken, confusing it with somewhere else, but she couldn't deny it. After all, Hyun-woo had clearly known the geography around them.

Even though he hadn't found the door to the basement, up to that point he had walked onward without hesitation. That meant he really did know the way.

Thanks to several hours of sleep, the fog in Celestia's mind had gradually cleared, but her confusion remained. If anything, it grew stronger every time she looked at Hyun-woo.

"Who...are you, really...?"

Celestia gently caressed Hyun-woo's cheek as he breathed softly. She felt the warmth that lingered inside the tent soften his skin.

Her tangled thoughts gave her a headache, as if her mind was a knot of yarn. She couldn't even say where it had gotten tangled; pulling on just one stray piece dragged the whole knot along, but she began unraveling it anyway, piece by piece. She had to, no matter what.

She decided she would not run away anymore. She'd realized too many times how great the cost was for turning away from her past.

Always think. That was what Celestia had told Hyun-woo. If she didn't follow her own advice, what meaning did those words have?

First thread: The lakeside, the mansion, and the circumstances she had seen in the underground sector—they were from her childhood, the day Myosotis had fallen to an unknown power.

Now she knew that those people were pureblood supremacists, and that Myosotis had always had some connection to them.

The pureblood supremacists had declared that Myosotis was worthless, and as a result, Myosotis collapsed in vain.

The only official survivor: Celestia Myosotis. Information about the safe house sank below the surface. She was the only one who knew of its existence.

Second thread: Hyun-woo had told her directly that he knew about that place. He'd said that thanks to that memory, he was able to guess where she was.

Thinking about it, his words hadn't been a lie. The small cabin where she had been was well hidden. Finding it so quickly on that vast estate would not have been easy.

Speaking about that memory, Hyun-woo had said it was there from the moment he'd opened his eyes. As he talked about Earth. When she first heard it, it hadn't seemed strange, but now the situation was different.

Hyun-woo had failed the Myosotis authentication. So how did he know about Myosotis's safe house?

That memory—or rather, why it was just that memory that he had, he himself didn't know. He wanted to go to Earth to find out why.

Third thread: Hyun-woo and Ian disappeared from the laboratory around the same time. They had both been test subjects at the same research facility.

Although her older brother Ian had been discarded, and Hyun-woo had been transferred elsewhere for management, as Hyun-woo himself said, records could be altered as easily as needed.

It was possible that Hyun-woo had gone with her brother. But if they had gone together, where was Ian now? Why was only Hyun-woo discarded in the residential area, while Ian was disposed of?

What was the difference between the two of them?

Fourth thread: According to Cystus, Hyun-woo was Lobelia's toy, and Lobelia herself had said Hyun-woo was not her toy, but her gift.

Lobelia hadn't denied doing something to Hyun-woo. On the contrary, she had affirmed it, even showing signs that she meant to reveal it on purpose by dropping them into the underground sector. She could have killed them but hadn't.

'... It's not enough.'

There were missing links. But Celestia didn't let herself get hung up on that. She simply cut away any unresolved questions.

She wove together only the pieces she thought of as truth. It didn't matter if it wasn't perfect. She knew she'd never get total closure anyway.

'There's something more.'

Suddenly a scene flashed into Celestia's mind.

What had Lobelia said when she watched them fall?

The whole area had been so chaotic that her memory was almost gone, but she managed to recall it at last. By continuously reaching for the memory, she finally pulled it forth.

The fifth thread: Lobelia's words.

― It's best if you get out quickly. If you want to save that person you're so desperate to save.

And what followed:

― And you too, Myosotis. ... Oh, actually, there's no need to make that distinction. I'd like you to be ready next time I see you.

Distinction. Dividing things that are not the same. Lobelia had said there was no need to distinguish. She had looked at both her and Hyun-woo as she said it.

Saying there's no need for distinction meant there was no difference between them, or that there was no dividing line. That meant...

'Think. Keep thinking.'

The sound of her heartbeat gradually filled the surroundings. Without realizing it, her breathing quickened, echoing in the air. The tension in her body became so intense she couldn't even blink.

Lobelia, who kept Whiteout and Blackout as if they were pets, had wanted to tell them something. She didn't say it outright, but they had gathered a lot of information from the laboratory.

Celestia didn't think Lobelia would say something pointless. The look in her eyes back then had been playful, but beneath it, there was seriousness.

If not needing to distinguish between them was intended as a hint from Lobelia—if she had let the answer slip on purpose—

"...!"

Celestia was shocked by the conclusion that suddenly arrived. She jumped to her feet. The chair she had been sitting on scraped backward from the force, out of its place. The noise was quite loud, but Celestia didn't care.

Her racing thoughts hijacked all her senses. Her heart pounded wildly. Her trembling eyes fixed on Hyun-woo, as if only the two of them remained in the world.

"... Hyun-woo."

Ian. That was the conclusion, and at the same time, Celestia instinctively rejected it. Even though this was the reasoning she had arrived at herself, she couldn't believe it.

'It's too much of a leap.'

There were too many implausible points. Lee Hyun-woo and Ian. She did have evidence of connections between them, but there was none that proved the two were one and the same.

'It doesn't make sense.'

No matter how advanced cloning technology was, she'd never heard of transferring memories. And there was no evidence of Hyun-woo's body being a clone.

'... No.'

Celestia realized, too late, that discussing what made sense was pointless. The reality she was dealing with was already far from 'reasonable'.

Are ghouls reasonable? Are mimics? Was it reasonable for countless people to die as part of the pureblood supremacist plan?

No. Every one of these was beyond reason. So too were all the things she had endured. Celestia considered one possibility.

'Was a miracle involved?'

She knew the ultimate aim of the pureblood supremacists. They worshipped the Holy Tree and sought the power of Miracles or supernatural powers.

Indeed, the underground laboratory existed for that purpose. The clone growth facility was to supply test subjects. There was even a training room for awakening Miracles, wasn't there?

According to the laboratory's data, miracles were powers that overturned common sense. The mere existence of the Blue Crystal was evidence. The energy it contained, in defiance of its size, not only violated physical laws—it outright negated them.

'The two disappeared at the same time.'

Celestia returned to the third thread.

Ian and Hyun-woo were in the same laboratory. Ian was discarded; Hyun-woo was transferred for management. Lobelia was their handler.

Lobelia seemed to side with no one. Yet she paid special attention to Hyun-woo. She was expecting something from him.

She didn't know the specifics for lack of information, but this much was clear. Hyun-woo awoke in the residential area at the same time he was transferred to Lobelia's care, and Lobelia said there was no need to distinguish between him and Myosotis. She even acted as if she didn't recognize the name Ian.

Perhaps, by means of a Miracle, Lee Hyun-woo and Ian had been merged, or Ian's mind had been placed inside Hyun-woo's body.

It was a huge leap. But if she was right—

'Maybe.'

My brother is Hyun-woo. No, Hyun-woo is my brother. The possibility was growing stronger. But there was still a problem.

Hyun-woo possessed some of Ian's memories but didn't have Myosotis authorization. That meant his body had completely changed—even down to a single drop of blood from Ian's body.

Was it just Ian Myosotis's memories that had been transplanted? Even those transplanted memories were incomplete. So could she really call that "Ian"?

It was entirely up to her how she judged this. If she believed Hyun-woo was Ian, then he would be. If she denied it, then Hyun-woo could never be Ian. He had lost everything that made up Ian.

The Ian who resembled her, whom she wanted to be like—no longer existed. But Hyun-woo, who sometimes acted like Ian, was there.

She couldn't accept it. She must not. This wasn't from guilt or resentment at herself for not realizing sooner.

Ian was the one who had sacrificed himself for her to the very end. If she just convinced herself and made a decision alone, it would be no different from insulting Ian.

So she must not accept it. She needed time to cool down.

'... I...'

Even as her mind struggled to deny it, Celestia realized, belatedly, that her feelings were already changing.

As she reached the same conclusion again, a strong vertigo hit her. She collapsed back into her chair. Her head hurt badly. She realized her body was not in a normal state now.

"... Haha."

A feeble laugh slipped out. Had she lost her mind? To have such an absurd conclusion.

'This isn't right.'

Was she simply trying to find a replacement for Ian now that she knew her brother was truly gone? Was her heart, battered beyond repair, just looking for a place to rest—something that felt like a home similar to what she wished for?

Unexpected luck—serendipity—had already come her way. She couldn't control the urge to believe, even as her reason struggled against it. It was the path of least resistance. The easy way.

"Hyun-woo..."

Celestia lowered the hands that covered her throbbing head and looked at Hyun-woo, her gaze clouded with complicated emotions. She recalled the first time she'd seen him.

Because Celestia bore the pureblood supremacist mark, he'd looked at her with great wariness. She was used to such looks, but that day, it had nagged at her, and she'd watched him closely.

His growing suspicion, for some reason, made her feel unusually hurt, so she had turned away. Then, after a few days, she met him again at the central tower in the residential area. Perhaps because she'd once saved him and left a good impression, his suspicion had lessened noticeably.

When she asked for help, he had helped her, as if he had no choice. That had continued to this day. How many times had Hyun-woo's presence saved her life?

'Still...'

Even Eric would have done the same. If it had been Eric by her side instead of Hyun-woo, she told herself, he would have done the same. She repeated it obsessively.

If she judged Hyun-woo to be Ian, what would change? How could she explain? In fact, the memories you have are Ian's. You inherited part of them. So you could be my brother.

If she said it that way, what would change? Hyun-woo would never accept it, and even if he did, she herself could not accept it.

With sad eyes, she opened her lips.

"Hyun-woo, tell me. ... No, tell me—are you my brother? If it's true, how much is left in there?"

If your memory were to return, would I still exist inside you? She swallowed that question. Celestia quietly wiped the moisture from her eyes.

Her feelings were too complex to separate out just one. Yet out of all of them, guilt was the largest.

"What should I do? I wish you were my brother. I want to call you that. But I can't—not right now, at least."

Even knowing her heart was leaning that way, Celestia wanted certain proof. After all, it could all be a trick Lobelia had set up. The slightest doubt left her paralyzed.

"I wish I could say that, even though you were right in front of me, I was looking somewhere else. That I was a fool. That I was looking for you—and now, once again, you came to find me. ... Just a little longer, let's wait a little longer."

As if promising herself, Celestia murmured. She dreamed of the beautiful future waiting for her. She knew it was more than she deserved, but she couldn't stop fantasizing.

Her long-suppressed desires—or maybe her space psychosis—had burst free, and now they were almost beyond control.

"If you really are my brother, there's nothing I wouldn't do. For you, for your sake—anything..."

Celestia pulled her shirt slightly. The nape of her neck was revealed. Celestia quietly stood, making no sound at all. She herself did not know why she stood, or why she lowered her head. No—she averted her gaze from reality for a moment and looked into a fantasy.

'It's just for a moment, just to check...'

What was she confirming? She had already checked that there was no trace of Ian's body on Hyun-woo. Doubts like that didn't even rise to the surface.

In the moment when even Saturn's presence was covered in darkness, two shadows merged into one. The thinnest, softest skin pressed close.

Celestia recalled every time she had kissed him. Even if it had been in a crisis, a kiss was still a kiss.

Hyun-woo claimed he didn't remember, but in truth, she remembered everything. Even if it had been for survival, they'd both felt awkward mentioning it and so they'd avoided the topic.

Eventually, as quietly as she had gotten up, Celestia returned to the makeshift bed. She pulled the blanket over her head, so that the sound of her heart pounding in her ears—like someone pounding at the door—would not escape.

-------------= Clacky's Corner -------------=

Celestia, you bad bad girl.

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