novelraw Chapter 257 : Chapter 257
Chapter 257 : Chapter 257
Chapter 257: Han So-hee
So-hee crossed her arms and alternated her gaze between Ho-cheol and the will.
"How about you try to explain yourself?"
So-hee's chilly expression and cold atmosphere, which I had never seen before, looked ready to grab my collar at any moment.
No, she was restraining herself by crossing her arms precisely because she wanted to grab it.
"Sss-heub."
A sound of escaping air escaped my lips.
The will I had entrusted to Wolf Fang had a significant amount of content concerning Smiley.
But since that matter was now perfectly resolved, the content needed revision.
That's why I had only brought it to modify the content, yet I got caught.
It was too late to regret not hiding it more thoroughly now.
Finally giving up on vaguely glossing over it, I sighed.
"It's a misunderstanding."
I felt a little wronged.
The title 'Will' might be unsettling, but the content was mostly composed of a firm resolution—the kind that vows to somehow return alive.
And even if I did die, it would simply be due to a lack of power.
I wished for her not to harbor regret or a desire for revenge.
Yes, I was planning a fate similar to Smiley's.
If So-hee had torn open this will and read the content, it might have been easier to explain, but by maintaining her boundary here, my situation only became more awkward.
"Because of the nature of my work. It wouldn't be strange if I died at any time, right? I thought it would be more awkward if I suddenly disappeared without a word."
"Do you think I don't know that!"
So-hee raised her voice, which was rare for her.
Her clenched fist trembled slightly.
The fact that I wrote a will, and the fact that I hid its existence, meant that I had secretly included my own death as a possibility, didn't it?
To her, I was an existence who could overcome any hardship or adversity.
She had never once considered my death.
Ho-cheol dies.
The mere absurd thought was shaking her more severely than ever before.
"…I'm sorry for shouting. But I."
So-hee also knew.
She was not normal right now.
The very act of feeling these emotions, and confronting me about it, was beyond ridiculous—it was pathetic.
But she couldn't help it.
My existence had grown too large within her, making it impossible to let it go.
It wasn't that preparing for a contingency was bad.
However, if I was truly considering that scenario, then instead of writing a few simple words and leaving them behind.
"You're writing a will because you might not be able to convey what you want to say? You could just say it to my face instead. Do you even care about the feelings of the person who is left all alone when a loved one suddenly vanishes?"
Her choked voice was filled with complex emotions.
"You're the worst. I'm not your toy."
I scratched the back of my head with a complex expression.
If I succeeded perfectly, it would be an overreaction, just instilling unnecessary worry.
This time, it was a truly pure consideration, not one of those selfish thoughts I occasionally regretted.
I never expected it to be received this way.
A person's heart was not as simple as I thought.
"I."
After a brief moment of deliberation, I opened my mouth again.
"Excluding my parents, I've gone for more than ten years, ever since I started working as a villain, without sharing feelings like love, affection, goodwill, or that kind of emotion with anyone."
Of course, there was Smiley's existence, but sadly, we parted in death before I could fully realize those feelings.
And since then, I had lived burdened by duty, responsibility, and guilt.
"So, when I encounter those kinds of emotions, I don't know how to react and how to return them."
That was also the reason why I had deliberately avoided and postponed the signals I had received numerous times from numerous people until now.
"So, I didn't know it would feel like that to you. I'm sorry."
So-hee bowed her head deeply.
She wanted to pour out an abusive stream of words.
But when I apologized like that, she had nothing to say.
No.
In fact, her being angry, regardless of the apology, was ridiculous.
Seeing So-hee struggling to breathe, I turned away.
"You don't seem like you're in a state to talk. Take some time to compose yourself."
However, just before I left the room, So-hee grabbed my wrist.
"Don't go. Don't disappear and leave me alone again."
It would have been better if she were simply brazen, but sadly, So-hee was blaming herself and feeling guilty just for honestly revealing her emotions.
I was still clumsy when dealing with other people's positive emotions, but conversely, I was more sensitive to negative emotions than anyone else.
And the current So-hee was too easily swayed and consumed by those negative emotions.
Simply letting the situation pass wouldn't do anything but make things harder for her.
Therefore, I pushed away So-hee's hand that was holding my wrist.
Instead, I lightly embraced her.
"Don't blame yourself. Everything you do is for me, from beginning to end. Would I be even slightly upset about that? If anything, I'm sorry for not recognizing it sooner."
Kwoong—
A sound of something hitting hard was heard from somewhere.
It didn't take long for her to realize that it was the sound of her own heart.
It was at this moment that So-hee finally and clearly confronted her own feelings.
Why had she reacted so sensitively to my will?
The reason was a single, simple emotion.
The situation where I might die was already too horrible for her to bear.
Me dying, me being gone, me drifting away.
She could not tolerate any of it.
She couldn't clearly define it because she was feeling it for the first time.
Until now, she had only guessed its identity by observing its vague form.
Until now, she had been moved by that emotion.
And now, even the smallest, remaining blurry part was pulled out and revealed.
This feeling was not simply goodwill, or affection, or anything so light.
Yes.
She could clearly tell.
***
The dinner table felt suffocating.
Even Ji-an, who usually chatted happily and lightened the mood, felt that something was strange today and kept glancing at the two of us.
Only the clattering of tableware broke the silence as the three of us ate.
Dinner ended in silence, and So-hee got up from her seat without her usual greeting.
She glared at me, resting her hands on the table.
She turned away, briefly glanced at Ji-an, and gestured with her chin.
Although some rice was left, Ji-an, startled by So-hee's appearance which she was seeing for the first time, put down her chopsticks and followed her out.
After the two disappeared, I let out a sigh of relief.
"I don't know if I ate with my mouth or my nose."
I thought I had successfully alleviated So-hee's guilt and negative emotions with my last remark.
However, I still couldn't figure out what that look meant.
If I tried to talk to her, she would intentionally avoid me, so I couldn't honestly talk things out with her.
However, I couldn't focus solely on her either.
I lifted my shirt and bowed my head.
The wound sustained from the fight with Yu-hwa was not just a simple injury or shock; it remained deep in my chest like a curse.
Although it had healed considerably now, I couldn't guarantee it would fully recover by the decisive battle.
The decisive battle with the monster was just a few days away.
It was meaningless to try to increase my power any further.
Instead, I had to focus on recovering this wound and raising my condition to its peak.
I lightly stretched my body and finished my light training for condition management and meditation for recovery.
Lying straight on the bed, I stared blankly at the ceiling.
Before, I barely slept 3 or 4 hours a day, and most of that was spent having nightmares, making it rare for me to have a proper night's sleep.
But at some point, the frequency of nightmares decreased, and I could sleep soundly.
And since sending Smiley away again.
After shedding all the emotions that lingered for her, I was no longer tormented by nightmares.
Was sleep always this good?
I opened my eyes.
In contrast to my usual habit of sleeping soundly in a proper posture, my current position was quite uncomfortable.
My limbs were spread out in a star shape, firmly bound and tied to all four posts of the bed.
Even lightly tugging them wouldn't break the restraints.
Judging by the material, they seemed to be closer to vines or branches.
Even in this restrained situation, I didn't panic and quickly and coldly assessed the situation.
The result was that Ji-an seemed to have caused trouble again.
"What is this now."
While I was feeling awkward about the new, unpredictable move, the door opened.
I immediately expected to scold Ji-an, but it wasn't Ji-an who entered the room.
Standing in the darkness was So-hee.
She whispered.
"…You think you can just die whenever you want. So I decided to do whatever I want too."
Saying that, So-hee walked steadily and stood next to the bed.
She took off her socks and climbed onto the bed.
More accurately, she climbed onto my body.
Supporting herself with her arms and legs, she brought her face right above mine.
"Take responsibility."
So-hee, who had never forgotten to use formal speech, spoke informally for the first time.
Before I could fully grasp the meaning of those words, So-hee bowed her head deeply.
My cheek and her cheek touched.
So-hee whispered in a very small voice.
"I know. I can't monopolize you."
Because Ho-cheol was a good person.
He probably felt it was his duty to return every positive emotion he received.
That meant that she alone could never be everything to me.
"So it's the opposite. You monopolize me. So I can never escape from you again."
This was all my fault.
For becoming such a precious and important person to her.
For making her feel these emotions, dream of a future together, and harbor desire.
"Take responsibility. Forever. By my side."
So-hee's slender fingers reached for my shoulder.
"If you hate it, you can cut me off and push me away whenever you want."
I didn't answer.
I put strength into my hands bound by the vines.
Udeuk—The bedpost bent, and the vines snapped.
After that, I easily removed the vines wrapped around my legs.
"Ah."
So-hee let out a sigh of disappointment, seeing me free from the restraints.
Was it a rejection after all?
She could understand my feelings somewhat, but she was hurt.
She quickly slumped and sighed, bowing her head deeply.
She was about to get off my body before suffering any more humiliation, but.
I quickly hugged her with both arms and laid her down beside me.
At a distance so close that our breaths touched, I stared intently at her.
"Why? Wasn't this what you wanted?"
My expression and eyes were far too serious for it to be a joke.
"No, well, that is."
So-hee, who had been in control just a moment ago, but was now lowered to the same height, felt her eyes spin.
She struggled to get up again, but I held her tight, absolutely refusing to let go.
"Trying to run away? Are you scared now that you've been caught?"
That single sentence brought her back to her senses.
She barely managed to calm her rapidly beating heart and looked straight into my eyes.
"I'm not scared."
So-hee reached out and grabbed my left hand.
She pulled my hand closer.
She slightly parted her lips and lightly bit my finger—the ring finger—through the gap.
Ha-up—She repeatedly chewed gently on the finger she had taken into her mouth.
She opened her mouth again and took out the finger.
A distinct mark was left on the underside of my ring finger.
"I. I."
So-hee, as if she had made up her mind, looked at me one last time and said.
"I love you."
A sudden confession.
But a not-so-sudden confession.
I hesitated and started to open my mouth.
No, I was about to.
So-hee shook her head, cutting me off before I could speak.
"I won't ask for an answer right now. So, this is a promise."
She stroked the back of my hand, specifically the bite mark she had made.
It wasn't a confession meant to burden me.
"You must return alive. And when you come back, give me the answer to today."
She tilted her head and rested it on my chest.
"Next time, I don't intend to end it like this, like today."
Then, as if the tension had released, she closed her eyes and immediately fell asleep.
"…Seriously."
I let out a surprised, hollow laugh.
She burst out everything she wanted to say and just fell asleep.
No, perhaps she felt this was the only answer possible.
I pulled my hand out and checked the hand she had bitten.
I stared at the bite mark, which remained as clearly as a ring, for a long time.
The situation that I could no longer postpone or avoid was imminent.
And I had already decided on the answer.